The Start of Something New
by janiedmbe
Summary: Caroline and Kate had been married for less than 24 hours when tragedy struck them. With Kate in a coma and a new baby to look after, Caroline is left feeling vulnerable and alone. With her ex-husband in the same situation, will this spell trouble for the newly wed? Who will she turn to when she is at her lowest ebb?
1. Chapter 1

_Kate pulled her cardigan around her and folded her arms across her chest. The surroundings were familiar to her but she didn't know where she was or what she was doing there._ _She walked a little further, smiling to herself at the spring flowers which were just pushing through the earth._

 _And then as she rounded a gentle bend in the path, she spotted a familiar figure in the distance. And she suddenly remembered why she was there._ _Her pace quickened and the smile on her face broadened._

 _She broke into a jog, her cardigan flapping behind her in the breeze, her hair slowly coming loose from its band. But she wasn't making any headway._ _If anything, she was further away._ _She stared into the distance, confused and bewildered._ _She needed to reach her, needed to be with the only person she had ever truly loved, the only person who had ever truly understood her._

 _She started running again, this time with passion and purpose. She put her head down and pumped her arms and legs._ _After a short time, she was breathless and unable to carry on any more._ _Stopping, she bent double, her hands on her waist, her chest rising rapidly._

 _Slowly, she raised her head and looked in dismay. The figure was gone and she dropped to her knees, her hands clutching her stomach._

 _"_ _No!"_

* * *

Caroline jolted awake and pulled herself upright in the chair. She angled her head and listened. Had Kate just called out? She moved forward and stood at the side of the hospital bed, lowering her ear to the breathing tube.

"It's alright Kate. I'm here. Ssshhhh. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

She carefully picked up her hand in her own and ran the palm of her other hand over her forehead, gently stroking the bridge of her nose with her little finger.

"Kate, can you hear me? Kate, it's Caroline."

Nothing.

"If you can hear me, squeeze my hand. Or open your eyes."

Still nothing.

Caroline's posture slumped and she stood looking at her wife, the tears coursing down her cheeks. She stood that way for almost an hour, speaking softly to Kate and caressing her cheek and rubbing the back of her hand. She longed for her to open her eyes so she could lose herself in the depths of them. And her heart yearned to see the twinkle that appeared when she smiled.

"Hello love. Any change?"

Caroline turned slowly at the sound of Celia's voice. The look in her daughters' eyes pained her and she walked to her side and put her arm around her.

"Not really."

"Oh love."

Celia took Caroline in her arms and gently forced her head onto her shoulder. She rubbed her back and rocked her slowly from side to side.

Her body shook as she silently sobbed in the warmth and safety of her mother's arms, a thousand words unspoken. Eventually, she pulled away and wiped her tears with the sleeve of her jumper.

"Anyway, how are you? How are the boys? And Alan? I hope they are all behaving themselves."

"Yes, they're all fine. Don't you worry about them. You concentrate on Kate and the baby. How is little Flossie?"

Caroline wandered back over to the bed and placed her hand on Kate's shoulder.

"Oh, the baby is fine. They wheeled her in here this morning and I held her and fed her. She looks so tiny. So tiny and and, well, so helpless. She still needs the incubator for a little while because of her jaundice and her low blood sugar. But you would expect that wouldn't you, you know after what she has been through. Poor little mite. I mean, it was a shock for her as well wasn't it? Let's not forget that. Being wrenched from her mother, from Kate like that. It was a million miles away from what we had planned. We wanted it to be so peaceful and calm and so, well so not like this."

"Come on love. Don't you go upsetting yourself. You need to keep your head together for both of the girls. Here, I've brought you a flask of tea and something to eat. And some clean clothes to get changed into. Why don't you go and grab a shower while I stay here?"

Caroline started to walk away from the bed and then turned and went back to be at Kate's side.

"I don't know mum. What if Kate needs me? What if something, well you know, what if something "

She paused, unable to say any more.

"Happens? Nothing is going to happen. And besides you're only down the corridor. Go on. It might make you feel better. It will certainly make you smell better."

Caroline laughed feebly and placed her hand on her hip. She raised her eyebrows at her mother.

"Are you implying that I smell?"

Celia was at her side and she took hold of her hand.

"Only ever so slightly. Now get a move on. I'll be here when you get back."

* * *

Caroline closed her eyes and tipped her head back. The water poured onto her face making it difficult for her to breath but she kept her head in the same position, allowing the water to cascade into and over her open mouth until she couldn't hold her breath any longer and she had no choice but to turn away. Her chin fell onto her chest and she panted lightly and ran both her hands through her hair, moving it off her face completely.

Less than 4 days ago, she and Kate had gotten married and they had spent the day celebrating with their friends. The day didn't go off without drama. How could it when Celia was her mother? Things were never straight forward when she was around. That said what had happened that day was all but forgotten now. Forgiven in the throes of the devastating tragedy that had beset the family less than 24 hours after the marriage ceremony.

Kate had promised to be back as soon as she had dropped the boys off. William was returning to Oxford by train and Lawrence was going round to Angus' to give Caroline and Kate time to themselves. Little did they know what was in store for them. She still remembered the knock on the door and the 2 police officers stood on the doorstep. She could still recall every word of the conversation she had had with them and every detail of the accident that Kate had been involved in. However the time that had passed between that day and now was pretty much a blur.

In times of adversity, Caroline normally went into auto pilot. She took control of the situation and commanded her resources like an army of well-trained soldiers. She was level headed and logical and formulated a plan of action quickly and succinctly. But now she was the total opposite. On the outside, she was the same Caroline. Perhaps a little dishevelled and dark eyed but to anyone who didn't know her, she was every inch the head teacher of a very successful independent school, professional to the core. However, she was like a duck swimming against the tide and under the surface of the water, she was moving nineteen to the dozen, struggling to keep her emotions in check and to keep focussed.

Caroline had a beautiful little girl who was being kept in an incubator and Kate was still in a coma under sedation while the doctors assessed her injuries. People had come and gone and offered their help and support although she remembered little of the conversations they had had. Most of it was inane drivel and she paid little attention. The only time she really listened was when the doctors or nurses came to talk about Kate.

The rift between Alan and herself and Alan and her mother was mended and she had even been open to consolation from Gillian. But none of that truly mattered now did it? None of it was important in the grand scheme of things.

Caroline turned off the shower and hurriedly dried herself. She rubbed her hair vigorously and blasted it with the hairdryer while she rifled through the bag her mum had given her and took out the change of clothes. She couldn't help smiling to herself as she caught a glance of how she looked in the full length mirror.

"Oh good lord! You didn't choose this outfit did you mum? I bet Lawrence grabbed the first thing he saw in my wardrobe."

She smoothed down the shirt and pulled her hair back into a clip, quickly applying some lipstick before leaving the shower room.

* * *

As she walked down the corridor, she spotted Celia and Alan waiting outside the room where Kate was. She stopped dead in her tracks and dropped the bag that she was carrying. It clattered loudly to the floor.

"Mum!"

It was an anguished cry and Celia hurried towards her.

"Don't worry love. It's OK. It's OK. The doctor is in with her. They asked if we would wait outside while they examined her and did some tests."

She lowered her voice, glanced over her shoulder at Alan and then looked back at Caroline.

"I think he wanted to examine her down below." She mouthed the last two words and indicated with her hands.

Caroline sighed and her body visibly relaxed.

"I thought that, oh God, I thought something had … do you think he would let me in, let me be there to see what is happening?"

Alan walked towards them.

"I'm sure he would love. You are her wife after all. Why don't you go in? He can always ask you to leave if he thinks you will be in the way."

Caroline leaned and kissed Alan on the cheek.

"Thank you Alan. I will."

She knocked gently on the door and without waiting for an answer, opened it slowly. The doctor had his back to her and he carried on looking through Kate's notes. If he had heard Caroline enter the room, he didn't acknowledge her. She stood with her back against the door waiting for the doctor to finish what he was doing and turn around, all the while staring nervously at what he was doing.

"Hi, I'm Kate's partner, err Kate's wife. Kate and I are, we are married."

She stepped forward and extended her hand which was met with a warm smile and a firm hand shake.

"Dr Malik. Pleased to meet you Miss err Mrs McKenzie."

"McKenzie-Dawson. Caroline McKenzie-Dawson."

The name still sounded strange to her.

"We haven't changed our names yet. We only got married 4 days ago. We haven't had time."

Her gaze fell to the floor and she chewed on the inside of her bottom lip while she regained her composure.

"How is she?"

Caroline's eyes pleaded with the doctor for some good news.

"Very poorly. Your wife is very poorly Caroline. May I call you Caroline?"

Holding up her hands and shrugging her shoulders, Caroline nodded.

"As you know, we had to remove her spleen which was ruptured in the accident. We also repaired damage to her stomach wall which had a small tear in it. There is some bruising to her liver which we are sure will heal in time and she also has superficial cuts and abrasions to her back. However the biggest concern for us is the cerebral contusion, or bruising of the brain tissue, which is one of the reasons why we still have her in an induced coma. We are waiting for the swelling to go down and we are monitoring that very closely. And last but not least, there is the small matter of the caesarean section that she underwent. How is your daughter?"

Caroline smiled at him.

"She is doing fine. A little underweight but she is getting stronger every day."

The doctor nodded.

"That's good. Good. Well I am pleased to say that things seem to be progressing well with Kate. Her vital signs are strong and I want to attempt to remove the breathing tube today. You might want to leave the room while I do that."

"Do I have to? Can't I be here? I promise I won't get in the way."

Dr Malik looked at her.

"Only if you are sure. Some people find it a little distressing."

She shook her head.

"No, I'll be fine."

Caroline stood in the corner of the room, her arms folded across her chest. From time to time, she chewed on her thumb nail, something she did when she was extremely agitated or nervous.

"What happens if, err well what happens when you take out the tube and she can't well, you know. Then what happens?"

The doctor had kind eyes and Caroline was drawn to him. He walked slowly across the room and put a reassuring hand on her arm.

"The ventilator is helping Kate because her injuries make it difficult for her to breathe well on her own. While she is on the ventilator, her body is able to rest so that it can heal. It isn't keeping her alive, just giving her that extra bit of help she needs. Does that make sense?"

Caroline slowly nodded.

"We want to give Kate a chance to breathe on her own. If she can do this, we will stop the ventilator. We will do a series of spontaneous breathing trials first to see if she is ready. Then we may use CPAP treatment - Continuous Positive Airway Pressure. She will still have the tube but we will be using the machine in a different way."

Caroline continued to listen intently to the doctor.

"We will wait and we will watch the monitors at the side of her bed. We will watch to see what happens to her oxygen saturation levels, to her heart rate, to her blood pressure. It may be that she just isn't quite ready. And if she isn't we will try again, perhaps tomorrow, perhaps the next day."

The nurse picked up her clipboard and stared intently at the monitors. She started writing something, glancing up and then back down to check that she had written everything right. She gave the doctor a small nod and he turned some of the dials on the machine and stood back, his hands clasped behind his back, his body straight.

"Sats have dropped to 97%. 96%. Stabilising at 96%."

The doctor walked up to the top of the bed. He started talking to Kate.

"OK Kate, this is nothing to worry about. We are just helping to make you better. There is one lovely lady, well 2 actually, that are desperate to see you again."

Caroline blushed and half smiled at the doctor. She fidgeted in the pocket of her jeans and started to make her way to the bed.

"Is she Ok?"

"She seems to be coping very well. We obviously need to keep a very close eye on her. We need to see how well she handles breathing on her own. But the initial signs are looking good. She is a very strong and determined woman, your wife. I think she will be OK."

A lone tear started to slide down Caroline's face and she concentrated on the face of the doctor.

"It is still very early days though Caroline. I need you to understand that. Kate is by no means out of the woods. The swelling on her brain is going down slowly but we won't be sure of the extent of the damage until she fully wakes up."

Her head snapped to the side.

"What do you mean, extent of the damage? What does that, oh God! Do you mean she could be brain err that her brain could be. What exactly are you trying to tell me doctor?"

"The brain is a very delicate and complex organ Caroline and Kate sustained quite a knock to it. When this happens …."

"Yes, yes, I know all about what happens to the brain when it is comes under considerable force Dr Malik."

Caroline was sharp with him but as soon as she realised, she slowly closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be snippy with you. I'm asking you to give me impossible reassurances, to confirm things when you don't know yourself aren't I?"

The doctor nodded his head and sighed.

"I understand Caroline, I do. But if you want me to be honest with you then you are right. I cannot tell you what the outcomes of this will be. I pray to your God and mine that Kate is the same old Kate when she wakes from this. But I cannot guarantee it. There are no guarantees in this life. I wish there were."


	2. Chapter 2

_She took the stairs 2 at a time and stopped on the first floor landing, tilting her head and listening for the cries of the baby. They were coming from the top floor._ _She quickly climbed the second flight of stairs and walked towards the room where the door was slightly ajar._

 _There was a crib in the far right hand corner by the window and Kate made her way towards it all the while making little crooning sounds in an attempt to soothe the crying infant. She ran her hands along the changing table and picked up a small soft rabbit, smiled then put it down again._

 _Leaning into the crib, Kate lifted up the bundle of pale yellow blankets. Putting them over her shoulder, she gently started patting and pacing the room, slowly moving her upper body up and down._

 _Within seconds, the crying stopped and Kate let the blanket drop into the crook of her arm and looked down._

 _The blanket was empty. Kate scrunched it up in her hands and then spun round, her eyes frantically scanning the room._ _Her breathing became shallow and she started to panic._ _Running over to the crib, she lifted the cot sheet but it wasn't hiding anything._ _Where was it?_ _Where was her baby?_

 _Placing her hands on the side of her head, she stared wide eyed at the open door and opened her mouth to scream. But nothing came out._

* * *

"Why don't you go home love and get some rest? Your mum and I can stop for a while, can't we Celia?"

"What? Oh sorry Alan. I was miles away. No. No, I'll stay here. Well, I might wait until they have fetched the baby down and then go home for a few hours. Will you be OK here?"

"Of course we will won't we Celia? We will keep an eye on Kate and make sure she hasn't changed her mind and leaves the minute you are in the car."

Caroline smiled at him.

"Oh Alan, if only. I wouldn't care if she said she had changed her mind and she was leaving me. At least that way I could reason with her, tell her much I love her. Hear her voice."

Celia took hold of her daughters hands in her own.

"She will wake up you know. She is a strong woman. She just needs some rest, needs to get better. She will come back to you when she is good and ready."

They were interrupted by a knock on the door and the entrance of a nurse wheeling a baby incubator in front of her.

"Look who I brought to see her mummies."

Alan looked into the incubator at the baby who was wide awake and looking around her.

"She's lovely Caroline. She looks more like Kate every day."

"I know, she does doesn't she."

Caroline felt a twinge of sadness. The baby would never look like her and that hurt more than she could ever put into words.

"How is she doing nurse?"

"Very well. In fact, we are going to take her out of the incubator today and pop her in a cot to see how she gets on. We need to chat about the next steps and getting her home. Perhaps you can think about when you will be ready to do that. I know that you weren't ready for her arrival. It was a bit unexpected wasn't it. But I think that in the next couple of days, she will be strong enough to go home. She was only very slightly underweight when she arrived and her jaundice is all but gone."

Caroline looked from Celia to Alan and back to Celia again.

"I , I, I err well, I don't know. It's just that with Kate still here I don't think, I just don't know. I'm not sure."

Celia stepped forward.

"We'll have a talk about it won't we? You need to start to think about getting back to normal now."

"Normal? I don't know what normal is any more. What exactly is normal? Would you like to enlighten me mum?"

Caroline was getting worked up and she lifted her hands above her head and then brought them down, running them through her hair before locking her fingers behind the back of her head.

"Caroline, don't go upsetting yourself or the baby. Your life will get back to what it was before you know it. Well not quite because you have Flossie now. But you will be a family again soon."

Alan's tone was soft and calming and Caroline brought her hands down to her side.

"I know. I'm just so tired. I can't think straight."

"And that is why you need to go home and get some rest. Some proper rest. A good nights sleep in your own bed. Why don't you feed the baby and then get off home?"

Caroline walked up to the incubator and looked over at the nurse.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to shout. I am trying to keep all this together but it isn't easy."

She sat in the chair and unfastened the front of her blouse, exposing her chest. She had been practicing kangaroo care since the baby was born. The feeling of having her on her chest, like a baby kangaroo in its mother's pouch was reassuring. She knew that the baby could feel her heartbeat and was slowly getting used to her smell. She no longer felt uncomfortable or awkward. And she had taken to holding the baby on Kate's chest too so that she knew who her mummies were.

The nurse lay the baby on Caroline and she gently stroked her head with her finger.

"Hello little one."

"Do you have a name for the baby? We can't keep calling her "the baby" or Flossie."

Celia stood behind Caroline and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Kate and I never talked about names. Well, we did but we never made a decision because we couldn't agree. Kate likes old fashioned names but I wanted to see what the baby looked like first. You can't call a baby Daisy when she looks like a Charlotte can you?"

The nurse handed Caroline a bottle and she gently rubbed the teat on the baby's lips, waiting for her to open her mouth. She looked like a small baby bird when she did finally realise that this was her lunch and she quickly latched onto the end and started sucking.

She gazed lovingly at the baby and snuggled her closer.

"Rosie? Grace? Eleanor? Oh, I'm no good at this. She looks like a baby. She looks like Kate. Perhaps we can call her Kate."

The nurse stood over Caroline and looked at the baby feeding.

"There really is no rush to name the baby you know. Some people don't know what they are going to call them and some people can't agree. We can just call her Baby McKenzie-Dawson for now."

"If it is OK, I'd like to wait to discuss this with Kate. After all when you name a baby the name is for life isn't it. They're stuck with it. It might as well be a name they can live with."

* * *

The house was quiet and Caroline's shoes echoed loudly on the tiled kitchen floor. She opened the cupboard, took out a bottle of wine and poured herself a large glass. Leaning on the kitchen counter, she stared out of the window and sighed.

Since Christmas last year, Caroline had really started to embrace the idea of being a mum again. OK, so it was Kate who had brought up the idea and although she wasn't too keen initially, it was something she was getting used to. She had even started to get excited about the baby and had helped Kate get ready for her arrival. They had gone shopping together for outfits, chosen the pram together, argued over the car seat. And painting the nursery was a joint effort. Well almost – Caroline had agreed the paint colour that Kate had chosen. So why was she apprehensive about bringing her home?

The sound of the door closing brought Caroline back into the room and moments later, Lawrence came bounding into the kitchen heading straight for the fridge.

"Mum!"

Caroline smiled and opened her arms to him but he just stopped dead in his tracks and stood looking at her as if she was a stranger. She was the last person he expected to see.

"Hello love. How are you?"

"Good, yeah, good. You?"

She nodded.

"Tired. But OK. Have you eaten?"

She started to walk towards Lawrence who advanced further towards the fridge.

"I'm having tea with Angus. I just came home for some things. School books, PE kit, that sort of thing."

"Oh. I see. Do you err shall I, well I can drop you back round at his house if you like in a bit."

Lawrence helped himself to a huge chunk of cheese and cut a corner off.

"No. Thanks. His mum is outside waiting. I said I would only be a minute so I'd best get my things. And I'm staying at his again tonight. So I'll get my things and I'll see you, well I'll see you."

Without waiting for Caroline to agree or respond, he went out of the room at the same speed at which he had entered.

"Oh, bye then."

Caroline topped up her glass of wine and wiped the counter top down where Lawrence had cut the cheese. She felt like she had gained a daughter but was slowly losing a son.

* * *

It was dark when Caroline opened her eyes and she turned over onto the other side of the bed,. She reached out her hand and felt nothing but empty space. She turned back and fumbled for the bedside light, squinting as she turned it on. For a moment she was confused and then she remembered. Kate wasn't there. She looked over at the clock. It was showing 0345am.

She fell back onto the pillows and rubbed her forehead. It was 730pm when she had gone to bed so she had had over 8 hours sleep. However she still felt tired, drained.

Caroline swung her legs around and sat on the edge of the bed. She rested her elbows on her knees and supported her head in her hands. She made the decision there and then to go back to the hospital. She didn't care what time it was, she just wanted to be with Kate.

The drive took her less than 20 minutes at that time of the day and she was at the nurses station just before 430am. The nurse looked surprised to see her.

"Well, you're an early bird. Is everything OK?"

Caroline leaned on the desk.

"Shouldn't I be asking that question?"

They exchanged a smile.

"Yes, everything is fine. I just went to bed too early last night and woke up too early this morning in an empty house and found myself at a loose end. I thought I might as well be awake and with my wife."

"Ahh, young loves dream eh?"

Caroline laughed.

"I wouldn't say we were young, either of us. But yes, we are very much in love. Can I go in to see her?"

"Of course you can. I'll bring you in a cup of coffee in a little while."

"Thank you."

Caroline opened the door and entered the room. She turned around and closed it behind her, placing the flat of her hand just underneath the door handle. Even though she knew she wouldn't disturb Kate, she was careful not to make a noise.

The room was bathed in the light coming from the machines. Once her eyes adjusted, Caroline was disappointed to see that Kate still had the breathing tube in her mouth. However, it didn't appear that the machine was breathing for her which gave her renewed hope.

She walked over to the side of the bed and stroked Kate's forehead. Bending forwards, she planted a kiss on the bridge of her nose.

"Hello my love. I couldn't keep away."

She picked up Kate's hand and brought it up to her cheek and gently rubbed it up and down. Bringing it down to her lips, she kissed the finger tips and sighed.

"Oh Kate. I miss you so much. The house is too quiet without you. I hate having to decide what to have for tea, what to watch on the television. I want you home. I don't think I can do this on my own. The baby needs you and I need you."

She pulled up a chair and sat down, still cradling Kate's hand in her own. She longed to lay with her, to hold her and fall asleep in her arms. Instead, she placed her head at the side of Kate's arm and stroked the back of her hand with her thumb. She had never felt so alone in her life.

* * *

The hand on her shoulder was gentle but it was enough to wake Caroline and she jolted upright.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump. How long have you been here?"

Dr Malik was standing over her.

"What time is it?"

She stretched, yawned and looked at her watch.

"Oh good Lord. I've been asleep for almost 3 hours. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be a burden, to get in the way. I just couldn't sleep and I wanted to be here and "

"It's fine Caroline. Honestly. You're not in the way. In fact you being here is probably speeding up Kate's recovery. Research tells us that the brain of someone who is in a coma is still very much aware of what is going on around. I have good news. We are going to remove Kate's breathing tube this morning. Do you remember, we talked about it yesterday?"

"Yes, yes, I do, I remember. Do you think she is ready?"

"Well, she has spent long periods of time off the ventilator since yesterday so I am confident that she will be OK. And she will be more comfortable without the tube in her mouth. Why don't you get a cup of coffee while I call the team in here to help. We will come and find you when we are done."

The look on her face told the doctor that she wasn't ready to leave. She started towards the door and then stopped.

"Go on, she'll be fine. I'll take good care of her. I promise."

Caroline smiled at him.

"Thank you doctor. Make sure you do."

* * *

She sat in the hospital canteen staring into her coffee cup. She watched the foam whirling round and slowly disappear into nowhere.

It seemed synonymous with her own life which currently made no sense at all. Her ex-husband had recently lost a child and as a consequence his life was suddenly taking a very different path. Her wife had been in an induced coma since the day after their wedding. Their new born baby had not had the start in life that either of them had wanted and was also in hospital waiting for her mummy to get her life together so she could bring her home. Her youngest son hadn't spoken to her much since the wedding and hadn't acknowledged the fact that he had a baby sister. And she was due back at work in 4 days time and had absolutely no idea how she would cope. She felt like she was in a hole full of quick sand.


	3. Chapter 3

_Kate was at Sulgrave and on her way to morning assembly. She knew that if she missed the start, Caroline would make her feel like one of her pupils for arriving late._

 _She opened the door to the main hall and slipped inside. Her plan was to walk around the edge and take her seat at the front._ _The door slammed shut behind her and she winced._ _When she looked around, the room was empty._ _No chairs, no students, no teachers._ _Just her._ _Her footsteps resonated on the wooden floor as she made her way to the stage at the front of the hall._

 _Suddenly, the piano started to play the school song. Kate spun round and stared._ _There was no one there._ _Starting to panic, she made her way to the back of the hall, anxious to get out._

 _As she got nearer to the large double door, it started to get smaller and smaller. The closer she got to it, the smaller it became until it seemed unlikely that she would be able to pass through it._ _She stood gazing at it, the music from the piano getting louder, the walls closing in on her._ _She was trapped._

 _She squeezed her eyes shut and started to count backwards from 10, a technique she had deployed as a child when she was scared._

 _"_ _3...2…1…"_

 _When Kate opened her eyes, she was stood in the middle of a forest surrounded by thick trees and bushes. She had no idea where she was but she wasn't in the hall anymore and she no longer felt afraid._ _In fact she actually felt liberated and free._

* * *

When the nurse opened the door for Caroline and she walked back into the side ward, she had to breathe deeply and swallow hard to stop herself from crying. Kate looked beautiful. With the tube and the tape gone, she looked like Kate. She looked like she was just taking a nap and she longed to shake her and wake her up.

The nurse was still in the room writing in Kate's notes.

"How'd err how how how did it go?"

She folded her arms across her body and hugged herself. And then in a nervous reaction she brought her hand to her mouth and began chewing on the outside of her thumb nail,

"As we had expected. It is very normal for a patient to cough and splutter a little when we remove the tube, even if they are still heavily sedated and that is exactly what Kate did. We gave her a quick blast from the CPAP machine but she didn't need the mask on. Her sats haven't dropped and her blood pressure is fine. All the readings on the monitor are as we would expect them to be."

"That's great. It is great isn't it? So what happens now?"

Caroline walked over to the bed and stroked Kate's cheek with the outside of her index finger.

"Yes, that is a very good sign. She will be going for a CT scan later on today so that we can measure how much the swelling on her brain has gone down. And we are already reducing the sedation meds so hopefully she will start to wake up. So it is just a matter of waiting until she is ready."

"Really? You mean … really?" Caroline smiled properly for the first time in what seemed like forever.

"Really! I know that the last 5 days have seemed like an endless type of week to you but in terms of the injuries Kate has suffered, it is no time at all. It may be another day or so before she is aware of where she is and another 3 to 4 days after that for her to be fully awake and lucid. These things take time and in these cases, patience really is a virtue. Kate will do all this in her own time."

"Thank you. And believe you me, Kate does have her own way of doing things. Did you hear that Kate? You are getting better. That means that you can finally meet the baby, our daughter. And we can give her a name. I bet she already thinks her name is Flossie the way my mother and Alan speak to her."

She heard the nurse laugh and she joined in.

"I'll bring her down if you like. Give me 10 minutes and I'll see what they say upstairs."

"Thank you. They told me yesterday that she is ready to come home but I don't know. I mean it's not like I haven't got experience of a new born baby because I have. God knows I almost brought up both of my boys single handed while my husband was off, well, while he was off doing his thing, you know writing."

She paused.

"But, well with Kate being in here and her being so poorly I just don't know if I will be able to do it. I am supposed to go back to work in 9 days time week. I love my job but I just don't think I will be any good at it if my mind and my heart are somewhere else."

The nurse looked at her sympathetically.

"I totally understand. But you need to think about the baby now. She needs to be at home and in an environment where she can start to flourish. Her time at the hospital is finished. There are other babies that need the care and attention she has just received."

Caroline turned up the side of her mouth and nodded.

"I had never thought of it like that before. But put like that, yes, yes you're right. Everything is almost ready at home. I will just need to get some last minute bits and bobs. I could take her home this evening if the nurses in peads still want me to do that."

"I think you're doing the right thing, I really do. I'll get someone to come and talk to you."

The minute the nurse had gone, Caroline sat down heavily in the chair and leaned forward. There was no going back now. The baby was coming home. But she was coming home without Kate, without her other mum, and that left a huge cloud hanging over her head.

* * *

Her time with the baby was always special and she cherished the quietness and calm that came with feeding her. Long after the bottle was empty, she sat cradling her daughter, tenderly stroking her head and talking to her.

It was only 1030am but Caroline felt like she had already put in a day shift. And she still had so much to do at home to be ready for the baby. With much regret, she stood up and lay the baby back in her cot.

"Well my love, I need to go. I need to get things ready for this little one at home. I will be back later, I promise."

She leaned over and looked at her wife.

"You're very pretty."

She lovingly kissed her, savouring the taste of her mouth. She had missed this contact while Kate had been attached to the ventilator. Her lips felt dry and cracked and she walked over to her handbag and delved inside for some lip balm. Caroline applied the balm with her finger tip, delicately moving it around in small circles.

"There. That will help."

This time she planted a kiss on her forehead and reluctantly left the room, calling at the nurses station on her way out.

"I'm just popping out for a little while. I'm taking the baby home tonight and I need bottles and formula because we don't have any. Kate was going to breastfeed but I don't want to start expressing what with everything else that is going on with her. And we need smaller nappies because the ones we have are too big and what with the baby coming early and we need … oh we need, well we need a whole raft of things."

Caroline stopped and took a deep breath suddenly aware that she had been taking nonstop at quite a pace.

"Sorry, I'm rambling now aren't I? So I will be back later. She's in her cot. Fed, winded, changed and fast asleep. Oh, the baby that is. I'm talking about the baby now."

The nurse chuckled.

"Well I didn't think you were talking about Kate! And Caroline. Make sure you get some rest too. You will need all your energy if you are taking the baby home tonight. No name yet?"

Caroline shook her head.

"No, no name, not yet. I can't face the thought of naming her without consulting with Kate. She seems to respond very well to Flossie at the moment though."

The nurse laughed.

"I'll see you later if I am still on shift."

Caroline waved over her shoulder and left the hospital almost at jogging pace.

* * *

Her hands were full of shopping and she struggled to put the key in the lock and turn the large door knob at the same time.

"Shit."

One of the bags of shopping fell to the floor and she calmly dropped them all at her feet and turned to the task in hand. The door was unlocked and opened in seconds.

"Now why didn't you do that in the first place eh?"

Stepping over the threshold she turned around and bent over to pick up the bags.

"Is that you love?"

A familiar voice echoed from the kitchen and she smiled to herself.

"No, it's Attila the Hun come to seek revenge. Of course it's me! Who were you expecting?"

She walked sideways down the hallway with her huge haul of shopping and dumped it on the kitchen island. Her mother was at the sink.

"What are you doing here?"

She walked over and kissed her on the cheek.

"Oh I thought I would come and wash my smalls in your kitchen sink instead of putting a full load of washing on. Is that alright with you?"

Caroline raised her eyebrows and gasped.

"No it most certainly is not. You have a perfect …."

The look on Celia's face made her stop mid sentence.

"You're not really washing your smalls in my vegetable sink are you? Because if you were then I would have to …"

"Of course I'm not you daft bat. I'm just clearing around. I didn't get chance earlier."

Caroline sank in the large armchair in the corner of the room and kicked off her boots. She lay her head back and closed her eyes.

"You look exhausted love. You're not planning on going back to the hospital today are you?"

Caroline opened her eyes again and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Yes , yes, I am. I'm just going to have 2 minutes and then I am going to put this shopping away and then I, me, am going back to pick up the baby and bring her home."

Celia didn't need to ask if she was pleased about that. The smile on her face told her all she needed to know.

"Oh love. I am so happy for you."

"Thanks mum. We just need for Kate to get better and come home so we can be a proper family."

Celia put down the tea towel and leaned on the counter.

"You do know that when Kate does come home, she won't be able to do much for quite a while don't you? And when you go back to school, she will be at home all day on her own. You have thought about that haven't you? Me and Alan will do what we can but, well, we have our own lives and what with popping over to Halifax at every verse end, I'm not sure what time we will have."

Caroline looked at Celia from underneath her hand which was pressed to her forehead.

"Well, thanks for your support mum. Oh, you go ahead and shear some sheep and look after Calamity while I am here running myself ragged. God, don't you think I haven't already thought about what support Kate is going to need?"

Caroline stood up and started pacing the kitchen.

"There's no need to get snippy with me. All I am saying is that "

"I know what you are saying and if I am being totally honest, I would rather you not say anything."

Celia turned to leave. She threw her hands up in a surrender type gesture.

"Fine. You do what you want. You will anyway. I'm only next door when you want to talk about this rationally."

Caroline stopped and picked up a cloth. She picked up the knife block and started to wipe the kitchen counter where it was stood, all the while avoiding eye contact with Celia.

"I'm sorry mum. Don't be like that. I am going to speak to Gavin tomorrow and see what options there are at school. I don't think they will miss me if I take another couple of weeks off until the baby is settled and Kate is home. I am due some maternity leave anyway. I'll just take it earlier than planned. And I can always get someone in a couple of times a day to, well you know, to make sure Kate is OK."

"Do you think she will be home in that short length of time though love? You need to be realistic about these things. Kate has had major surgery, given birth to a little baby and been in a coma for almost a week now. And there is no telling when she will wake up."

She stopped what she was doing and threw her hands in the air.

"There you go again! I don't want to be realistic. I want her home, here, where she belongs. I want to wake up with her in the morning and go to sleep with her in the evening. And I want these things to happen next week, in a few days, tomorrow. I don't want to have to wait. And she could very well be awake now because they have taken out the breathing tube and they are starting to reduce her meds."

She sat back in the chair and leaned forward, chewing on her thumb and running her fingers frantically through her hair.

"That's good news love. I just don't want you to be disappointed when ..."

"I think you'd better leave now. There are things I need to do and places I need to be. Thanks for tidying round."

Caroline stood up quickly and walked the length of the kitchen. She stopped briefly in the doorway.

"Drop the latch when you leave please."

* * *

On the drive back to the hospital, Caroline reflected on the last 24 hours and the progress that Kate had made. She was no longer on a ventilator and she was hoping that the CT scan had shown that the swelling on her brain was going down. The wounds from where they had opened her up and stitched her back together were healing nicely and the bruises were starting to turn yellow and fade. However, she was still on a small amount of medication which was keeping her asleep and that worried Caroline.

Instead of being excited about bringing their daughter home, she was filled with apprehension and fear. It was not how it was meant to be. They should both be walking out of the hospital with the baby and settling her into their home. They should be taking it in turns to wake up during the night for the feeding and winding and changing. They should both be eager to put her in the new pram and push her down the street and show her off to everyone.

Caroline pulled into a parking space. Turning off the engine, she sat motionless, her hands at the top of the steering wheel. There was no going back now.


	4. Chapter 4

_Kate was sat on the sofa, her legs stretched out on a footstool. The baby was in a Moses basket on the other side of the room fast asleep._

 _The door opened and John came into the room. He bustled around and crooned over the baby and then left without saying anything to Kate._ _Then the door opened again and Gillian and Robbie came in._ _They did much the same as John had done, leaning into the basket and speaking to the baby before they left._

 _When Celia and Alan walked into the room, they looked at the baby and then at each other, the love evident in their eyes_

 _"_ _Aww I remember our little Caroline when she was a baby. She was so unassuming and quiet._ _My, how things change!"._

 _"_ _Our Gillian was the total opposite. Loud and brash. She still is."_

 _They both laughed and then linked arms and turned to walk away. Celia closed the door quietly behind her._

 _Kate tried to get up but couldn't move. Her legs felt like lead and she couldn't feel her feet._ _She tried to raise her hand to reach the TV remote but all she managed to do was move her finger._

 _Closing her eyes, she drifted off back to sleep. The baby would be fine._ _There were so many people around that would help Caroline look after her._ _She just needed to sleep._ _She was so tired, so very tired._

* * *

Although Caroline had only seen her that morning, Kate somehow looked different. She couldn't quite explain it but she looked like she was ready to wake up from a good nights sleep. There was something about her face that seemed more peaceful and relaxed than before.

She bent over and kissed her, inhaling deeply at the scent that she missed so much. More than anything, she longed to take Kate into her arms and bury her face in her neck. She gently hugged her shoulders and kissed her one more time before standing back.

"You look well. Well, as well as can be expected. But you look better than you did this morning."

She paused as though expecting an answer.

"I'm going to take the baby home tonight. I know, I know it's not what we planned. None of this is what we planned. But the nurses say she is ready to leave hospital. And I can't very well leave her here while there are other babies that need the care and attention and "

Caroline paused, this time not for an answer but because she thought she saw Kate's hand move.

"So I am going to get the baby and get her ready and then "

There it was again. She was certain this time. The index finger of Kate's left hand lifted up and waivered a few seconds before dropping back down again.

"Kate, can you hear me? You can can't you? Can you do that again for me? Can you lift your finger again?"

She stared intently at her hand, watching and waiting.

"Come on Kate. You can do this. I know you can. Lift your finger for me my love."

As she was staring, willing it to happen, the door opened and Dr Malik came in.

"Ah, Caroline. I heard you were here. Have you come to take the baby home?"

"Hmmm? Yes, the baby. Yes yes I have."

She was very distracted.

"Doctor, I think Kate can hear me. She just moved her hand, well her finger anyway. I know she did. It wasn't just my imagination. It wasn't was it?"

The doctor walked to the bottom of the bed and picked up Kate's notes. He started flicking through the pages.

"She could very well have heard you Caroline. We have started to slowly reduce her medication and bring her out of the coma. She is still in a state of unconsciousness but she will be more alert to her surroundings and to what is happening."

"So she is erm, she is, she is getting better, right? She is going to be alright isn't she?"

It was more of a statement than a question.

"You know I can't give you those reassurances Caroline but yes, all the signs are good. Kate is getting stronger every day. And the results from her CT scan earlier were very positive. The swelling on her brain is starting to go down and it doesn't look like any further surgical intervention will be needed."

Caroline smiled, picked up Kate's hand and brought it to her mouth, kissing it gently.

"Thank you. Thank you so much doctor. Don't move. I'm just going to fetch someone. I'll be right back."

* * *

Caroline had been standing peering through the window at her daughter fast asleep in the cot for almost 20 minutes now. Despite the excitement of knowing that Kate was slowly waking up, she was suddenly filled with doubt and fear about what she was about to do.

"You can go in you know."

The nurse startled her and she lifted her head and smiled at her.

"Oh, I didn't want to disturb her. Perhaps I'll just come back later."

As she turned to walk away, the nurse started to approach her. She picked up her hands.

"It's OK to feel scared you know, to question whether this is the right thing to do. I can't pretend to know what you are going through Caroline but all these feelings are normal for someone taking their baby home for the first time. It is a very exciting time yet at the same time completely overwhelming. These feelings will be doubled, trebled for someone in your situation knowing that your wife is downstairs in another part of the hospital recovering from an horrific accident."

Caroline attempted to smile and then her emotions took over her and she started to gulp air in, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Quickly gaining composure, she took one very deep breath and slowly exhaled, her cheeks puffed out, her lip pursed.

"I know. I'm just being silly I guess. It isn't as if it is the first time that I have done this. It's just not how it was meant to be. Kate had everything planned out. The birth, the outfit for the journey home. She had even decided what I would cook for our first night together in our house as a family."

The nurse started to steer her back to the window.

"And it can still be like that. You can dress baby in the outfit that Kate chose and go and show her how pretty she looks. And you can cook dinner tonight for you and, you and your son."

"Lawrence."

"Yes, you can cook for you and Lawrence. And you can take pictures and show Kate when she is better. Show her what the baby's first night was like at home. How well she settled and how much fuss you made of her."

Caroline gently touched the nurses shoulder and looked at her.

"Thank you. Yes, you're right. I need to do what Kate wanted me to do even though she can't be here with us. Right, I'll get the baby and then go and see Kate before we go home."

Home. She was taking the baby home. It was a bittersweet feeling but she needed to brush that aside and concentrate on the baby for now. Tonight would be all about her and the baby. Oh, and Lawrence if he could be bothered to come home.

* * *

Caroline cautiously entered the room, the baby sleeping in the car seat which she was holding in both hands in front of her. She wasn't sure what she expected to see but when her eyes adjusted once more, Kate was still laid in bed in the same position. She admonished herself.

"What, did you expect her to be sat in the chair reading a book? She moved her finger, her finger."

She walked over to the window and peered through the blinds. Something else that hadn't changed: the view from here. She had spent many hours leaning on the windowsill watching the clouds floating by, the changing colour of the sky, the hills in the distance.

"Well, this is it. This is us going home. This is me taking the baby home for the first time. How pretty does she look in her outfit? Just like her mummy."

She bent down and took her out of the car seat and walked over to the bed. She gently lay the baby on Kate's chest, holding her there with one hand.

"Say goodbye to mummy. Goodbye mummy. We'll see you tomorrow."

Picking her up and cradling her in her arms, she bent to kiss Kate.

"Good night. Sweet dreams. I'll see you in the morning."

She stopped at the door and stared until her eyes started to water. Blinking hard, she gently closed the door behind her.

* * *

It took Caroline about 10 minutes to figure out how to secure the car seat into the car. All the while, the baby was looking up at her, seemingly taking it all in.

"If your other mummy was here, she would have had this done in an instant. Oh, I am just no good with this sort of thing. Hey, I hope you're not laughing at me because this isn't funny. Not funny at all."

Finally happy that the seat was correctly fitted, she climbed into the drivers seat and closed the door, glancing over at her daughter.

"Right then, where shall we go? The seaside? To London to see the Queen? No? Shall we just go home then?"

Once she was on a straight stretch of road, she hit a button on the steering wheel and called Lawrence.

"Hi its mum. I am just ringing to tell you that I am on with my way home with the baby, with your sister."

Silence.

"Lawrence, are you there? Anyway, I'm cooking shepherds pie for tea so if you are free and erm and you haven't, well you know, haven't eaten, I just wondered if you would like to join me, to join us."

Nothing.

"So I hope to see you later. Bye. Bye bye."

Answer machines. She hated them.

At the other end of the phone, Lawrence hit the button to end the call and tossed his phone back on the settee. He was in the middle of a crucial World Cup final match on the Xbox and Angus was taking a beating.

* * *

Caroline set the car seat down on the kitchen counter and filled the kettle, putting it on to boil. Taking out her percolator she heaped 2 spoons of coffee into it and stood back gazing at the baby.

"So this is home. This is where me and mummy and now you live. Oh, and your 2 big brothers. One is studying very hard at university and the other is just studying. You are unlikely to see either of them very much. And you have already met Granny Celia and Grandad Alan. They live next door. Well they live next door some of the time. The rest of the time they are over in Halifax on a farm with lots of sheep and Gillian. Now she really is something else. Her heart is in the right place but she, well, she just has a habit of crashing through life. Oh and then there's John. You might see John. John. What can I say about him? Well, let me see. He was my husband a very long time ago. He is the father of your 2 big brothers. And he is a useless toss …" She stopped herself.

"Anyway, you don't need to know about him do you. Let's see what we have for tea."

She stuck her head in the fridge and rummaged around, picking up things and putting them back again. In the end, Caroline didn't cook anything. She felt there wasn't much point if she was the only one who would be eating it so she settled for a sandwich.

Once she had eaten and fed the baby she carried her upstairs and into the nursery. Everything was laid out and she placed her on the changing table and started to undress her. It was like riding a bike and in no time at all, the baby had on a clean nappy and a baby-gro and was ready for bed.

"Come on then. You will be sleeping in mummys room for a while. Don't get used to it though. This is a very temporary arrangement."

She moved the Moses basked to her side of the bed and set the baby down. Snuggling under the duvet, she picked up her tablet and started to read a book, glancing over the top from time to time to check on the baby.

Her eyes started to get heavy and she read the same paragraph twice before she decided to settle down to sleep. She turned over and closed her eyes, reaching out her hand and laying it gently on the baby's leg.

* * *

Caroline groaned and turned over and then she suddenly remembered. The baby! She jumped out of bed and lifted her out of the Moses basket, holding her close and gently stroking the top of her head.

"Shhhuusshhh. It's OK little one. Mummy's here."

She bounced her up and down and felt around the carpet with her toes for her slippers. Once she had located them, she slipped them on and with her free hand, she grabbed her dressing gown.

"Come on, let's get you fed and then we can both go back to sleep."

She crept down the stairs and put on the light in the kitchen, shielding the baby's eyes from the glare. She winced.

"Oooo, that's bright."

"Caroline."

She spun around and nearly dropped the baby.

"What the f …. John!"

"Sorry did I make you jump?"

"No, no, you didn't make me jump John. I always expect to see my ex-husband in my kitchen in the early hours of the morning. What the hell are you doing here?"

Her raised voice unsettled the baby and she started whimpering. John jumped up from the chair and kicked over an empty bottle of wine.

"I came to see Lawrence and he said you were probably in bed because your car was outside but he hadn't seen you. We got chatting and I had a drink and I guess that I fell asleep and then Lawrence must have gone to bed and gosh this is embarrassing. Oh, it's a baby."

Caroline's voice was calmer and quieter and she gently rocked the baby while she expertly filled the kettle with one hand and retrieved a bottle of formula milk from the fridge. So Lawrence had finally decided to come home.

"No shit Sherlock. What do you want John?"

"Nothing really. Like I said, I called to see Lawrence and wanted to see how Kate was progressing with the pregnancy and everything. And then Lawrence told me that Kate had had the baby and that, well things didn't go too well. Difficult birth was it?"

Caroline almost dropped the baby for the second time in 10 minutes. Was he for real? This was so typical of Lawrence. And of John.

"Yes John. Yes, it was a difficult birth. This little one was born by emergency c-section while Kate lay in a coma because some tossers decided to knock her over as she was leaving a shop. They threw her into the air like a rag doll and left her for dead. And I came home tonight after spending the whole day with her and brought our daughter home for the first time. And I am very tired and not in the mood for all this small talk and clap trap."

John stood awkwardly, his hands thrust into the pocket of his faded corduroy trousers.

"Gosh Caroline. I am sorry. I had no idea."

"And why would you John? Why on earth would you. You are a selfish, conceited, arrogant little …"

She stopped herself and picked up the bottle, testing it to see if it was warm enough for the baby. John was still circling the kitchen.

"So how's Celia and Alan? And Gillian and the rest of the gang over at the farm?"

Caroline rolled her eyes and tightened her lips.

"You didn't come here to ask about my family did you John? So why are you really here? Why don't you just tell me and then you can fu.. you can leave."

"There's no need to be so aggressive Caroline. We've all had a difficult few months by the sounds of it."

Caroline slowly turned her head and looked over at John. She remembered the man she had married and in an instant decided that he was nothing like the man stood before her. Walking over to one of the big arm chairs, she sat down and started to feed the baby. The was a long period of silence and John stood still and stared opened mouthed at the scene before him.

"How are things with you? How's Judith?"

John started pacing again, looking over from time to time at her.

"Oh, yes, Judith. Still at her sisters. I haven't seen her since she, since we, you know well, since that awful day. Obviously. Gosh."

"And you? How are you John?"

"I'm OK . Yes I'm OK. Well, I'm not but you know. I suppose you have to be OK don't you. You have to get on with things. She's very tiny isn't she?"

He wrinkled his nose and leaned over to look closer.

"Good God John. How much have you had to drink? You smell like a brewery."

She moved to one side, protectively shielding her daughter from him.

"I think you'd better go, don't you? You know how I am and you know how Kate is. Goodnight John."

Without looking up, she listened for his footsteps to move further away and once she heard the front door shut, she lay her head on the back of the chair and sighed.

John had done a lot of things but he had always been there for her when the boys were little. Not so much when they were older but when they were toddlers, he was a great father. Well, she perhaps wouldn't go that far but he was almost great. He didn't deserve what had happened to him but she could no longer feel sorry for him. She was starting a new life and she just couldn't see a place in it for John, other than as the very distant father of her 2 eldest children.


	5. Chapter 5

_It was dark when Kate opened her eyes and the only light filtering into the room came from beneath the door._

 _Her throat felt incredibly dry and she swallowed hard a number of times and moved her tongue around. She tried to speak but no sound came out._

 _Already feeling tired, she closed her eyes again and drifted off back to sleep. The next time she woke, it was slightly brighter in the room._ _She moved her eyes from left to right, trying to figure out where she was._ _She didn't recognise her surroundings._ _The curtains were plain and boring and the bedding felt rough and clinical._

 _Closing her eyes slowly, she tried to lift her head up but everything felt heavy, almost leaden. Her head, her neck, her arms._ _It was too much effort and it took all her strength to move her head slightly to one side._

 _Kate still couldn't work out where she was but in a strange way, she felt safe. And it was with this feeling of security that she went back to sleep knowing that everything would be alright._

* * *

All things considered, her first night at home with the baby had been much as she had expected. Well with the exception of finding John in her kitchen. She got up again at 4am and when she next looked at the clock it said 0721am. She looked over into the Moses basket and was greeted by the baby who was wide awake and staring at the ceiling.

"Good morning little one. Did you sleep well?"

She pulled herself up and rested on her right elbow, reaching her left hand forward and gently running her finger up and down the baby's tummy.

"Are you hungry? No? I am. Well, I'm not but I need a cup of coffee. Come on, let's see what we have for breakfast. I might need to introduce you to a supermarket later on today. Are you ready for that? I'm not sure that I am."

She pulled on her dressing gown and slippers and picked the baby up, holding her close. She kissed the top of her head and inhaled, remembering how much she loved that smell when the boys were little.

As she walked into the kitchen, it was evident that Lawrence was already up. There was a loaf of bread out next to the butter which had a knife stuck in the top. The lid was off the orange juice and there was more spilt on the counter top than there was in the carton. The fridge door was wide open and Caroline could just see the feet of her youngest son.

"It's a good job I recognise those feet. I thought we had burglars."

Lawrence stuck his head out, looked at Caroline, grunted and then returned to rummaging. She turned to fill the kettle and instinctively started to clear away the mess.

"Can I get you any breakfast? I am sure there is something in there that I can rustle up for you. Anyway, I am home now. For good. Me and the baby. Would you like to say hello? Are you home for tea or do you have rugby? Do you "

She stopped talking and looked up. She was addressing the back of Lawrence's head as he disappeared down the hallway.

"Got to go. Don't want to be late."

She started to speak but the slamming of the front door interrupted her first 2 words and she stopped. Taking a deep breath, she slowly blew it out and then looked down at the baby.

The smile she gave her was a sad one and she looked long and hard into the face that she was coming to love so much.

"He does care you know. He just doesn't know how to show it. Most boys don't. You'll learn that when you get older. Much older I might add. You are too young, far too young to be worried about that."

As she walked to the other end of the kitchen, a familiar face at the window brought her back to the here and now and she waved at Celia.

"Ooo look! It's your granny. Come on, let's let her in and see what wit and wisdom she has to entertain us with today."

As soon as the door was open, Celia leaned forward and kissed her daughter on the cheek. They started talking at the same time.

"I'm sorry love."

"I'm sorry I asked you to leave the other day."

They both laughed and Caroline nodded to Celia to carry on the conversation.

"Why didn't you tell me that you were home?"

Celia held out her arms and Caroline placed the baby in them. She gently took her and rocked her up and down as she made her way into the kitchen.

"You didn't ask. Do you want a cup of tea? The kettle has just boiled."

Caroline flicked down the switch again and perched on one of the high stools. Celia sat down in the high backed chair in the corner. She looked down at the baby and started smiling at her and nodding her head.

"How has Flossie been? Did she sleep well? And how are you Caroline? Did you get enough sleep last night?"

Caroline was resting her chin in her hand, her elbow leaning on the counter. Her mother could be so tender and loving sometimes and she smiled at the picture in front of her.

"Surprisingly yes. Although I got the shock of my life when I came down to feed her in the early hours and came face to face with John. John, fast asleep in my kitchen after drinking almost a bottle of red wine. Can you believe it?"

Celia looked up, her eyes wide.

"John? What the devil did he want?"

Caroline threw her hands in the air.

"I have no idea. But he didn't get much chance to explain himself. I gave him the short edge of my tongue and he left. I couldn't help but feel sorry for him though. Well, for a little while anyway. It must be hard for him after losing his own baby. You know, to see me here with this one."

Celia looked down at the baby again.

"She is gorgeous isn't she. Yes you are!"

She started cooing again and Caroline busied herself with the tea.

"So how is Kate? Any news?"

Caroline shook her head.

"Not as yet. I am going to go back today after I have called into school. I have a meeting with Gavin to discuss my return. But she is getting better every day. The colour is returning into her cheeks and yesterday she moved her hand."

Celia looked at her daughter and her heart sank. She knew how desperate she was for Kate to wake up and she hoped that she wasn't setting herself up for another disappointment.

"Oh love. We had this conversation the other day. Are you sure you saw her "

She stopped, aware of the glare that she was getting.

"OK, OK. I'm not saying you're wrong but sometimes if you want something so much, so bad "

"Then it can happen. Mum, she moved her hand. Even Dr Malik said it was possible. They are reducing her medication and she is getting better. I know what I saw."

* * *

Caroline smiled to herself as she manouvered around the turning circle and into her own parking space. It had only been a week but she had missed the place. She climbed out of the jeep and pointed her keys in the general direction of the vehicle to lock it.

Climbing the 5 steps into the entrance hall of the school, she briefly stopped at the top and looked over her shoulder. She loved this place. It was part of who she was and everything she did was for the good of the school. Well, until last week it was. Over the space of 7 days her life had changed exponentially and she would have to learn to adjust.

Beverley was just coming out of her office with a pile of post and she stopped and gasped.

"Caroline! I wasn't expecting to see you so soon. How are you? I was so sorry to hear about Kate. How is she?"

Caroline smiled and walked over to Beverley. She reached out her hand and touched the top of her arm.

"I'm fine I think. Thank you. Kate is still in hospital obviously but she is getting stronger every day. The baby is at home with my mother and Alan getting spoiled rotten. She was singing to her when I left which is something of an acquired taste. Lawrence has hardly spoken to me for almost a week and I only ever seem to see him when he is hungry. And I am just about coping with the night feeds and the hospital trips. Is Gavin here yet?"

Beverley shook her head and started to steer Caroline towards her office.

"Ahh Gavin! He is coming to see you then? No he isn't here yet. You just about have time for a cup of tea. Shall I make a pot?"

"Yes thank you. That would be lovely."

She closed the outer door to her office and walked over to her desk, dumping her handbag in the middle of it before slipping off her coat. Gavin was always on time and glancing at her watch, she could see that she had 10 minutes to make a start on the pile of papers that were on her desk.

Sitting down she pulled the post towards her and then stopped. It didn't seem that long ago that Kate was sat opposite her telling her that she was pregnant and asking to be considered for part time working once she had had the baby. Caroline would give anything to be having that conversation again. Staring into space, she made no attempt to stop the tears that were spilling over and then felt instantly silly when there was a knock on the door and Gavin entered the office.

"Gavin. Thank you for seeing me at such short notice."

"No problem Caroline."

He noticed her puffy eyes.

"Oh, is this a bad time?"

She shook her head and waved him in the general direction of the chair opposite her.

"How are you? How is Kate?"

Caroline was getting fed up of having to explain to everyone how she felt and how Kate was progressing and the look on face told Gavin all he needed to know. He held up one of his hands.

"I get it. You're just about coping. And you just want everyone to leave you alone and hold back with the tea and sympathy."

She smiled and nodded.

"Yep. That just about sums it up. Now, if you'd like to take a seat, we can chat about the next 3 or 4 weeks and whether you think my idea will work."

* * *

An hour later and Caroline had finished her meeting, cleared the post and was heading home. She was confident that she had agreed the right way forward with Gavin. She was going to take her maternity leave entitlement early starting from the beginning of the week. The Governors had previously agreed 4 weeks and she had already made provisions for her most senior Deputy Head to take the reins. They would just have to bring the plans forward but Gavin assured her that he would clear that with the rest of the Board. They just wanted to make sure that Caroline was able to take the time off that she needed to be with Kate and the baby.

She popped her head into Beverley's office as she passed.

"I'm leaving now. Richard is going to take over as from today and I have brought forward my maternity leave. So I will see you in 4 weeks time. Well 3 and a half to be exact."

She was smiling and Beverley stood up and walked to her side. She hesitated and then threw caution to the wind and hugged her. Caroline hugged her back and breathed in deeply, overcome with emotion.

"Stop, you'll make me cry. And you wouldn't want to see that. I'm not a very pretty crier."

Caroline pulled back and smiled at her. She held her hand to her mouth.

"Sorry, it's just been so terribly hard. Everyone keeps asking how I am and I keep saying "I'm fine". But in reality all I want to do is run away and sit in a corner with a blanket over my head."

Beverley looked at her with a feeling of pity.

"And everyone keeps looking at me like that. The look of "Poor Caroline. I have no idea what to say to you and I am glad I am not in your shoes but poor Caroline." Oh, don't feel bad. I'm getting used to it now."

She started to back away towards the door.

"I'll be in touch, I'm sure I will. When I get organised, I'll bring the baby in to see you."

"I'd like that. What have you decided to call her?"

Caroline laughed.

"That is the sixty four thousand dollar question. She doesn't have a name yet. I am waiting for Kate, for her to get better so that I can discuss it with her."

"Well whatever you decide to call her, I am sure it will be just beautiful. Take care Caroline. And if there is anything that I can do for you, anything that you need, just let me know."

"I will. Thank you Beverley."

Quietly closing the door, Caroline strutted quickly down the corridor, thankful that the children were in lessons and that she wouldn't have to talk to anyone else. Being back at school gave her a melancholy feeling because she wasn't back for good. For the next 4 weeks she was playing mummy with a new born baby.

* * *

"Mum, it's me. Listen, can you do me a big favour. What? Oh, yes, sorry. How has the baby been? Really? That's good, good. Listen, can you do me a favour please. I want to visit Kate for a little while before I come home. Err, I am just on my way to the hospital actually. Yes, yes, I did make an assumption. That's OK isn't it? Look if you don't want to look after her then I'll just err. Well, right. Yes. Well I guess that will have to be OK. Yes, yes, I understand. OK mum. Yes, I'll see you at 2pm. Bye. Bye bye."

Throwing her phone onto the passenger seat, she slapped her right palm on the steering wheel.

"Bloody Gillian. Bloody farm. Bloody mother."

She expertly stopped in just the right spot and pulled the ticket from the barrier before driving under it and finding a parking space. In no time at all, she was walking down the corridor towards Kate's room.

"Wow, don't you look smart?"

The nurse on the desk looked up as soon as she heard her footsteps and she whistled at her.

"Hey, I'm a happily married woman. You're making me blush."

Elizabeth laughed.

"So am I. What's the occasion?"

"Oh, this old thing? Well this morning I have been Dr McKenzie-Dawson, head of Sulgrave Independent School. I had a meeting with my chair of Governors so I thought I ought to make an effort."

"Wow, I didn't know you were a Dr. And a head teacher. Now I am impressed."

Caroline smiled at her.

"Don't be. Well, you can be if you want but it's no big deal. Well actually it is but, well, you know. How is Kate?"

Elizabeth stood up and walked slowly around the desk. She had a strange look on her face and Caroline suddenly felt her body go stiff. Elizabeth took hold of her hand and she found she couldn't move her feet. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Unable to do anything, Caroline stood rooted to the spot.

"Caroline."

Caroline turned her head slowly and suddenly her knees buckled underneath her. Elizabeth caught her and steadied her.

"You need to come with me. There is something I have to tell you. Something I want to show you."

She started to pull her towards Kate's room.

"No. I can't. I don't want to."

"It's OK, it really is OK. Trust me on this one."

Elizabeth leaned forward and pulled the door handle down, gently shoving Caroline into the room. She was like a petulant child, not wanting to enter. Squeezing her eyes shut, she reluctantly walked into the room and stood within a few paces of the door.

A croaky yet very familiar voice caused her eyes to snap open.

"Hello Caroline."


	6. Chapter 6

_Kate opened her eyes and looked around her. The sterile walls, the screens, the machines. She was in hospital._

 _Her hands quickly flew to her stomach which felt sore and tender. And quite flat. Flatter than it had been the last time she had soothed the kicking baby. She fumbled around with her finger tips, feeling under the gown she was wearing so that her hands touched her bare stomach. There was something there, a dressing or bandage. She let out a groan and became instantly aware that there was someone else in the room._

 _"_ _Kate. Kate. Can you hear me?"_

 _The voice was not familiar and when she turned her head in the general direction and opened her eyes again, she didn't recognise the figure in front of her._

 _"_ _Kate, my name is Dr Malik. I am looking after you. How are you feeling?"_

 _Kate looked frightened and she widened her eyes._

 _"_ _It's OK Kate. You've been in a car accident. We've patched you up and have been waiting for to wake up."_

 _"_ _The baby …."_

 _Dr Malik took her hand and started to feel her pulse._

 _" …_ _is fine. She is just fine. She is at home with your wife."_

 _"_ _Caroline."_

* * *

Caroline couldn't move. Her mouth was agape and her hand quickly moved up to her face to cover it. Her eyes were wide and she slowly started to smile. Tears were spilling down her cheeks and she took 2 small steps forward before her hands fell down to her side and she let out a noise that sounded half way between a laugh and a cry. She stood back, one hand on her hip, the other pushing her hair back off her face.

"Caroline."

"Kate. Oh my God, Kate. How long have you err how are aww oh my God. You can talk."

Elizabeth laughed.

"Of course she can talk. Now, come over here and sit down."

With their gazes locked, they stared and smiled at each other for a good two minutes. Elizabeth slowly moved to be by Caroline's side and then she took her arm and guided her backwards towards the chair. Caroline perched on the edge of it, looking from Kate to Elizabeth and back again like a spectator at a tennis match.

"Kate opened her eyes in the early hours of this morning. Since then, she has had short periods where she has been awake and she has managed to have a short conversation with the doctor and myself. She has still not fully come round from her medication but Kate is definitely more aware now than she was earlier. She will still tire very easily so I must ask you not to excite her or wear her out too much. There is a long way to go yet but Kate is making amazing progress. It is a good sign that she is starting to speak and communicate with us. I will ask the doctor to come down shortly to give you more details. But the signs are very good."

Elizabeth looked over at Kate who was smiling weakly at them. She nodded in agreement.

Caroline was grinning like a Cheshire cat. She couldn't take her eyes off Kate and when her eyes started to close, she whispered her name. Elizabeth touched her on the shoulder.

"She's tired Caroline. It may not seem like much to you but this will have worn her out. Let her sleep."

"Has she asked about the baby? Kate, do you know about the baby?"

Kate opened her eyes again and smiled.

"Yes. The doctor told me. What is she like?"

She started to lick her bottom lip and Caroline looked around for a glass of water. There was one on the bedside locker with a sponge lollipop in it. She gently dabbed this on Kate's lips and look over at Elizabeth.

"It is OK isn't it?"

She nodded.

"You can give her small sips too but be careful."

Caroline stood upright and gently smoothed Kate's hair off her face.

"Oh Kate, she is just so, well just so perfect. A miniature version of her mummy. She is very pretty, almost as pretty as you."

She leaned forward and kissed the bridge of her nose.

"I will bring her in later to see you. You will fall in love with her the minute you see her, I know you will."

"Her name?"

Caroline smiled and looked at Elizabeth.

"Flossie."

Kate raised her eyebrows and opened her eyes wide.

"No. Please. Caroline. No."

Caroline took hold of Kate's hand and kissed it.

"I'm kidding. It's just a name my mother gave her. No, I wanted to wait for you to wake up, to get better. I wanted you to see her before we decided what to call her. Before we gave her a name that she will hate when she is older."

Kate looked pensive.

"Flora."

"Pardon? What did you say?"

"Flora. Flora Grace."

Caroline leaned forward, her ear right next to Kate's mouth.

"Did you say Flora Grace?"

Kate nodded.

"Well, urm, OK. Yes. Yes. Are you sure? Are you sure you don't want to see her first before you decide?"

Kate stubbornly shook her head.

"No."

Her eyes slowly closed and her hand fell out of Caroline's loose grip. Caroline started to panic and she looked across at Elizabeth who put her finger to her mouth to hush her.

"Let her sleep. Come on."

Reluctantly, Caroline followed Elizabeth out of the room and gently closed the door behind her. As soon as she heard it click, she slowly slid down the door and sat on the floor crying.

"I'm sorry. I thought I'd lost her. I thought I would never hear her voice again. I thought that I would be a widow after only a few short days of being married. I'm just so, well you know, just so relieved."

Elizabeth lowered herself onto one knee and took her hand in her own and put it on her leg.

"Oh Caroline. It's OK. Come on, let it all out. It's all going to be OK. It's OK to be relieved. It's OK to cry. However, it is not OK to be sat on the floor though in the middle of the hospital corridor. Come on, let's get you up."

Caroline laughed and allowed Elizabeth to pull her up.

"Thank you. It is going to be alright isn't it? Kate will be OK won't she?"

Caroline looked imploringly at Elizabeth who, still holding her hand, took her other one and brought them to her chest. She looked deep into her eyes.

"I hope so Caroline. I really do hope so."

Caroline sighed and squeezed her hands.

"Oh my goodness. My mother. I need to ring my mum. Will you excuse me."

Elizabeth nodded and smiled as Caroline looked down the corridor for somewhere to make the call. She spotted a group of chairs near the vending machines and flopped into one of them. Taking her phone out of her bag, she dialled Celia.

"Mum, it's me."

"Hello love. Everything OK?"

"Yes mum, I think so. Well, no I don't, err I'm not exactly sure really. I just spoke to, I spoke to "

"John?"

"No, I spoke to "

"The Archbishop of Canterbury?"

"No, no mum. I just spoke to "

"The Queen of Sheeba?"

"For goodness sake mum, will you just listen! I just spoke to Kate."

There was silence.

"Mum, are you there? Did you hear me? I said that I just spoke to Kate."

Celia was pacing around Caroline's kitchen. She glanced over her shoulder at Alan who was holding the baby high on his shoulder, gently tapping her back.

"What? Yes, sorry love. So Kate is awake? Is she alright? What about you Caroline? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. I'm fine mum, yes. And Kate is fine. Well, she is getting better at least. She has woken up. Kate has woken up and she has spoken to me and to the nurse."

"Oh Caroline. That's wonderful. Alan, Kate has woken up and spoken to our Caroline."

Alan grinned, his eyes twinkling and smiling back at his wife.

"Anyway, the reason I rang. The reason for my call, apart from telling you that Kate is awake. I wanted to tell you that we have given the baby a name. Well, Kate has given the baby a name. We are calling her, the baby, we are calling her Flora Grace."

"What did you say? Flora? Flora as in the margarine?"

Caroline rolled her eyes and held her mobile phone to her shoulder for a split second.

"Yes, Flora Grace. Kate, err, she she wants to call the baby Flora."

Celia stopped pacing and furrowed her eyebrows as though listening for the first time. She covered the mouth piece of the phone and looked over at Alan.

"They've finally given the baby a name."

"Aww, that's lo …"

She swatted her hand to silence Alan.

"What a nice name love. I think Kate has chosen well."

"Yes, I think so too mum. I think it suits her perfectly. So I will be home as soon as I can and then you can get off to see Gillian and Calamity and the rest of the family. Is that OK?"

Celia nodded then realised she was on the phone.

"Yes, that's fine. Bye love. Bye bye."

Caroline stared at the phone screen for a while after her mother had hung up then put her phone in her bag and started to make her way back down to the side ward. Quietly opening the door, she tentatively stepped inside and approached the side of the bed.

"Oh Kate. You can't begin to imagine how much I have hoped for this day. How I have prayed for the moment when you would open your eyes. When I would see your smile and hear your voice."

She bent forward and kissed her on the cheek, tracing her finger along her jaw line and around the outline of her lips.

"I'm going to go home and fetch Flora. Flora, our little girl. And then I am going to come back with her and you are going to meet her for the first time."

She kissed her once more and then left the room, closing the door quietly behind her. She almost ran back to her car, her step lighter and her smile wider than it had been in days.

* * *

As soon as Caroline entered the house, Alan was by her side. She turned to him and he opened his arms wide, inviting her into the warmth of his body. They hugged each other for what seemed like an age and Caroline unashamedly cried.

"It's OK love."

Alan rubbed her back and rocked her gently from side to side.

"Thank you Alan. Thank you for everything that you and mum have done this past week. I don't know what I would have done without you."

Celia appeared at the top of the stairs holding the baby.

"Flossie, the baby, Flora Grace, is all fed and winded and changed. Shall I leave her up here?"

Caroline started up the stairs towards her.

"No, no, I'll take her."

Celia carefully placed her in her arms and Caroline kissed her forehead.

"Flora. Flora Grace. It's a perfect name. Just perfect. Has she been ok?"

"Oh aye love, as good as gold."

Alan was looking up at them from the bottom of the stairs.

"In fact, when Lawrence burst into the kitchen, the way he does …."

"Is Lawrence home? Where is he?"

Caroline didn't know whether to carry on up the stairs his room or downstairs.

"In the front room. Him and Angus are having an X-Box tournament or something. Disturb him at your peril".

Caroline carefully walked down the stars.

"At my peril? Sod that. I haven't seen him for days. And this is my house. My house. And I will do what I choose."

* * *

Angus looked up as Caroline entered the room.

"Hello Dr Elliott, err Mrs Dawson err Caroline."

"Hello Angus. Are you well?"

"Yes thank you. Urm how is Miss McKenzie?"

"We are, yes, she is fine thank you Angus. Lawrence. Would you like to turn that thing off and at least acknowledge that I am in the same room as you?"

"In a minute. I'm in the middle of "

"Now."

Caroline stood in front of Lawrence, Flora still in her arms, and expertly turned off the television with her foot. She didn't move and waited for Lawrence to start his tirade towards her. It didn't come. Instead, he placed the remote control gently on the settee and stood up.

"Come on Angus. Let's go to yours."

He made towards the door and Angus awkwardly started to follow.

"Sit!"

The one word was firm, commanding, and both boys instinctively fell back down on the settee and sat upright.

"Angus, would you like to wait in the car for me please and I will take you home in just a few minutes. Lawrence, if you could just spare me a moment of your time, that would be much appreciated. I just need to speak to you. It won't take long."

Angus sloped out of the room, giving Lawrence a backward glance. Caroline waited until she had heard the front door shut.

"Right Lawrence. You need to listen to me. And you need to listen to me properly with both your ears. Whether you like it or not, you now have a baby sister. She may not be your flesh and blood or indeed mine but I am married to her mother so that makes her your step sister. And she lives in this house, here with us. So you need to stop sulking and grow up and face the facts. Which are these. You have a good home and a mother who loves you. You have Kate who also thinks the world of you and you have a sister who I am sure will grow up to love you equally as much too. Her name is Flora Grace. This is her, here in my arms. Oh, and you live here, with me and Kate and Flora, because the place where your father is living is a complete shit tip and you wouldn't last for 2 minutes there. And quite frankly, I really don't think you would want to. Live there I mean. Do you understand?"

Lawrence was speechless.

"So you are going to do as you are told and study hard. You will keep your nose clean and school and you will start to help around the house. Do you have any questions?"

He shook his head, almost too shocked to speak.

"You are a smart boy and I am sure you have realised that there will be some changes in this house that will affect you and quite frankly the sooner you get used to them, the better. Now I am going to put a coat on Flora, fasten her into the car and take Angus home. You can choose to come with me, with us, or you can choose to make a start on tea. I have left everything out on the side in the kitchen. I will leave the decision entirely up to you."

"I'll get my coat. I'm coming with you."

Caroline smiled as she watched her middle child slink out of the room.


	7. Chapter 7

Caroline could hear her heart beating in her chest as she stepped into the lift. Flora was sleeping soundly in the baby carrier, her bottom lip sticking out slightly, a look on her face that almost resembled defiance. Caroline couldn't help but smile, her heart full of so much love for this little person. So why was she feeling nervous, almost apprehensive? If she loved the baby, then Kate would love her more wouldn't she? It was her idea to get pregnant. She was the one who had carried her almost full term.

Elizabeth was still on duty and stood up and walked around the desk as soon as she saw Caroline.

"I thought I recognised that footfall."

She smiled at her and gave her a warm hug.

"Let's have a look at her. Flippin' 'eck. I think she has grown since the last time I saw her which was err …."

"2 days ago."

"Yes, 2 days ago. What, stop laughing! Babies can change so much in 48 hours you know."

Elizabeth grinned back at Caroline.

"It's lovely to see you smiling. Genuinely smiling I mean. How have you been? Has Flora settled in at home?"

Caroline set the baby carrier down on the floor and leaned on the reception desk.

"Yes, yes she has. She sleeps for 4 hours at a time during the night. And apart from the odd bit of colic in the early evening, she is a very good baby. I was blessed with William you know. He slept when he should, fed when he should and he met all his early development milestones early. So I thought I was in for an easy ride with Lawrence. But no. Not that one, not Lawrence. He didn't do anything by the book. And he hasn't changed a bit now that he is older."

She stared thoughtfully at the wall in front of her and then bent and picked Flora back up and started to walk towards the side ward. Elizabeth walked with her.

"So how has Kate been?"

"What, since you last saw her about 3 hours ago? She has been fine. Sleeping for most of the time which is a good thing. We are going to let her have a little bit of something to eat tonight. She needs to start eating proper food again so that she will get stronger. Rest and food to build her up again."

Caroline hesitated for a split second before she gently pulled down the door handle. Quietly, she entered the room, her eyes instantly going to Kate's bed. She was awake and as soon as she saw the baby carrier she beamed and tried to pull herself up in bed. Wincing, she looked imploringly at Elizabeth to help her.

"Here, let me. Bend your knees a little bit and dig your heels into the bed. That's it. Push with your legs."

Kate heaved herself up a little bit while Elizabeth placed her arm under hers and gave her that extra bit of lift. She smoothed the bed clothes down and lay there expectantly. The smile on her face hadn't subsided and she looked like an excited child on Christmas morning as she sat and watched Caroline unwrap Flora and fold her coat and hat.

"Here, support her head. That's right."

Caroline tenderly lay Flora in Kate's arms and then stepped back, the tears in her eyes threatening to spoil this precious moment. Kate looked from Flora to Caroline and then back to Flora. Both women were speechless.

"She is beautiful isn't she? Oh Caroline, how lucky are we to have her?"

"How lucky am I to have the both of you?"

She leaned forward and kissed Kate and then the baby.

"My 2 girls. Gosh, look at you both. Like two peas in a pod."

Reaching into her pocket, she took out her phone and switched to camera mode.

"Can you manage a smile for the camera?"

Kate feigned a frown.

"I think I just might if I concentrate very hard. Oh Caroline, I don't think I will ever stop smiling. Look at her, our daughter. Our precious daughter."

Elizabeth had been watching all this from the corner of the room and she stepped forward.

"Come on, give me the camera and let me take a photograph of all of you together. That's it. Move in a little bit so I don't get all of those machines in the background."

Caroline lay her right arm protectively around Kate's shoulders and with her left hand she placed it on top of Kate's. Their wedding rings were visible in the picture and Elizabeth looked at the shot she had taken and handed the phone back to Caroline. She was almost envious of the love that the two women obviously shared.

* * *

Kate cuddled Flora for about 20 minutes. In that time, she was fixated by her tiny hands and fingers and her feet. She stroked and held them, looking over at Caroline from time to time with a deep sense of love in her eyes and her face.

Sensing that she was getting tired, Caroline stood up and went to take Flora from her. She did it gently and in a very subtle way. Kate kissed the top of Flora's head and reluctantly gave her over.

"I don't ever want to let go of her but, well, thank you. I can't believe how tired I am. I've only been laying here holding the baby."

Caroline smiled and cuddled Flora close to her.

"You need to rest. You will be tired for a while. That's understandable. But I have noticed you are getting stronger every day. You will be home before you know it. Won't she Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth had been discretely watching the scene from the corner of the room, monitoring the machines and filling in Kate's notes.

"Sorry? Oh, yes she will. You need to remember Kate that you took quite a knock when that car hit you. Your body was a little bit broken to say the least. You need to get strong but you will be home in no time if you continue to make the improvements you have been making."

Kate watched Caroline dress Flora in her coat and fasten her into the baby carrier.

"You know Caroline, I never thought I would say this but you almost look like you are enjoying motherhood again."

Caroline turned to Kate with a look of amusement on her face.

"Of course I am. I had no choice really did I? If you hadn't have gone and got yourself knocked down, I would be at home with my feet up and you would be running round after me on maternity leave, catering for my every whim. But as things are someone has to look after the baby and as my mother is over at the farm more than she is next door, I really had no choice."

She raised her eyebrow and set her mouth in a thin line and Kate couldn't help but laugh. She clutched her stomach.

"Oh stop, don't. It hurts."

Elizabeth stepped forward and stood at the side of Kate, her hand protectively on her shoulder. She lifted the bed clothes and gently felt her stomach.

"I think that's enough fun and frivolity for one day don't you ladies? Kate really does need to sleep."

Caroline looked concerned.

"Does it really still hurt? How long before the stitches come out Elizabeth?"

"They're absorbable stitches Caroline. And they can take up to 2 weeks to dissolve or fall out. Kate's recovery speed is completely normal, believe me. I have seen some ladies who still have stitches after a month. Kate's are perfectly fine."

Elizabeth walked over to the hand sanitizer and squirted some onto her hands. She rubbed both of her hands together, scrutinising her fingers to make sure she didn't leave any solution on her hands.

"Right, well, it's nearly tea-time. You will be pleased to know Kate that the delights of the day are shepherds pie and mixed veg. I am sure you will be able to manage some of that won't you?"

Kate didn't look very enthused by the thought.

"Well, if you don't start to eat, you will be in here longer than you want to be. So the answer to that question is "Yes nurse." You will be able to manage some of that won't you?"

Kate looked at Elizabeth with her big brown eyes and sighed.

"Yes nurse."

"Right answer. Caroline, I'll walk you out as far as the desk. Kate needs to get some rest."

Caroline walked over to the bed and leaned forward so that her nose was touching Kate's.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

She kissed her tenderly, relishing the taste of her lips. Her fingertips strayed to Kate's jaw line and she caressed her face. Almost breathless, she stepped back and looked down at her wife.

"Oh God, Mrs McKenzie-Dawson. If only you knew what that has just done to me."

Kate chewed the inside of her lip.

"I can imagine but you wouldn't take advantage of me in the position would you?"

"Oh I would!"

Both women burst out laughing and once more Kate flinched and held her stomach.

"You had better go before you burst my stitches. Let me look at Flora one more time."

Caroline lifted up the baby carrier and Kate took her little hand in her own.

"Bye bye little one. Mummy loves you."

Caroline paused briefly at the door and turned to look at Kate.

"Night night. I'll see you tomorrow."

She gradually closed the door until she heard it click and then walked towards the exit.

"She seems so much brighter today doesn't she?"

Elizabeth nodded.

"And that's all because of you. You and Flora really are the ones pushing her on to get better. Oh, and me of course. You can't forget the excellent care that I am giving her."

Caroline gently elbowed Elizabeth and she feigned a stumble.

"Oy, I'll have you up for assault if you're not careful."

And laughing, she linked arms with Caroline and walked as far as her desk, watching her walk the rest of the way on her own. She stopped briefly to wave at her and Elizabeth waved back. Reluctantly, she returned to her own side of the desk and sat down to complete some paperwork before her shift ended.

* * *

Caroline was feeding Flora when she heard the front door slam.

"Lawrence, is that you?"

"Yeah."

"And me."

Her heart sank at the sound of the all too familiar voice.

"Caroline. Hello."

"John."

She looked up as he entered the room.

"Aww, are you feeding the baby?"

"No, I am preparing a lesson plan for my Year 11 students. Yes John, I am feeding the baby. Who happens to be called Flora. Flora Grace."

"Oh what a lovely name. Hello Flora."

Caroline rolled her eyes.

"Do you want something John?"

"Err no, no. I don't. Erm, well actually, yes, now you come to mention it. Yes I do. Lawrence."

"Yes, that is the name of our youngest son."

"May I?"

John motioned towards the sofa and Caroline indicated that he could sit down with a single sweep of her hand.

Yes, Lawrence. He's, well, he isn't quite oh gosh this is difficult."

John sat with his legs apart, his hands clasped in front of him.

"Just get on with it John."

"Lawrence is feeling a bit left out since the baby came. Since all this business with Kate."

Caroline stopped abruptly and took the bottle out of Flora's mouth. She slammed it on the table causing the baby to jump. She stared open mouthed.

"All what business? And feeling left out? Feeling left out? Let me tell you something shall I? Lawrence is hardly ever here. He comes down stairs in the morning, stuffs his breakfast in his bag and runs out of the door as quick as he can without so much as a hello or a good morning. He comes home in the evening and it's the same thing. I hardly get a word out of him. I feel like the Spanish inquisition if I so much as ask him what sort of a day he has had. He then skulks off to his room or he goes off out with Angus and I can only assume that he comes home in the evening. It isn't as if Kate is in the house at the minute. It is just me and him. And my mum when she pops round from next door. But he can hardly stand to be in the same room as me. I don't know why he is feeling left out. What have I done wrong?"

She picked the bottle back up and continued to feed Flora.

"And when did all this come out?"

"Err, just now. Tonight. When we were sat having our tea in some hamburger restaurant somewhere up the road."

"McDonalds? Wow, you really do push the boat out when you take him out for tea. Classy John."

John stared down at his hands.

"But you see the thing is. The thing is Caroline. I don't think that Lawrence is happy living here."

Caroline took the bottle and slammed it on the table again. This time, Flora protested and she picked it back up and carried on feeding her.

"We have had this conversation John. Lawrence is not going to live in that sh ….that pokey little flat of yours and sleep on the settee. Why would he when he has a perfectly good bed here? When he is old enough to make his own mind up, and that won't be just yet let me tell you. When he is old enough he can do what the hell he likes. Well within reason. Until then, he had better get used to this situation. He lives here where me and my wife Kate and our little baby Flora. End of. This is not open for discussion John. Close the door quietly on your way out will you."

John stood up and stood in front of Caroline, his hands awkwardly thrust into his pockets. He stared down at her, moving from one foot to the other for a moment before deciding it was time to leave.

Without saying a word, he walked out of the room and slammed the front door behind him. Flora jumped and started to cry.

"And that is one of the reasons why mummy is a lesbian."


	8. Chapter 8

Over the course of the next week, Caroline expertly juggled being a mum to a new born baby and visiting Kate twice a day in the hospital. She also managed to keep abreast of what was going on at Sulgrave and made a huge contribution to a lengthy report seeking funding for building work. Her relationship with Lawrence was also back on track.

"Mum, can you have a word with Mr Richardson. The amount of homework he is giving us is ridiculous."

Caroline put on her glasses and wandered across the room to where Lawrence had somewhat chaotically spread his school books across the kitchen table.

"What are you doing? Oh, quadratic equations. Well, they're easy. Once you understand how to complete the square, you can then derive the quadratic formula. Divide the quadratic equation by a, which is allowed because a is non-zero. Then subtract c divide by a from both sides of the equation, yielding "

"Mum, stop! You lost me when you said easy. Oh I am so going to fail this exam."

Caroline ruffled Lawrence's hair.

"No you are not. We will sort this, trust me. I will speak to Mr Richardson and ask him to go through this step by step."

Lawrence groaned.

"I would rather stick pins in my eyes. Thanks but no thanks. I don't want to stop in his classroom any longer than I have to."

"Well, only if you are sure. I hear that Mr Richardson has a cracking taste in music and has all the latest Greenday CDs."

Lawrence raised his eyebrows and looked over at her.

"Really? Cool! I suppose I can give it a try. Will you pay me if I go?"

"I most certainly will not!"

Caroline smiled. This was the first time in ages that they had a civil conversation and hadn't ended up yelling at each other. And no one knew more than her how hard she had tried. For 3 nights running, she had cooked Lawrence's favourite meals. She never once asked if he was staying around to eat it, she just let the aromas drift out of the kitchen door.

On the first night, she was disappointed that she was eating alone. The night after, she was so angry that he wasn't home that she had thrown most of the meal in the bin. But on the third night, Lawrence wandered into the kitchen and lifted the lid off one of the saucepans, sticking his finger in and licking it. He closed his eyes slowly.

"Mmmm that tastes so good. Will there be enough for me?"

Caroline was stood at the kitchen sink with her back to him.

"Of course there is. Are you sure you have enough time to sit down at the table and eat it?"

"Yes. I don't have any plans tonight."

The conversation over dinner was very pleasant and Caroline caught up with what Lawrence had been doing at school. She really missed the small talk about who had said what to who and her eyes lit up as smiled across the table at her son.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Me? Nothing. It's just that, well, I have missed this. You and me."

She reached her hand across the table and touched Lawrence's fingertips. He left his hand there for a short time and then moved it away. He placed both hands on his lap and started playing with his fingers.

"I'm sorry mum."

Caroline put her fork down quietly. She took the napkin from her lap, delicately wiped her mouth and looked over at him, waiting for him to continue. The silence made him feel awkward.

"What? I am sorry. I have been such an arse lately. A spoilt, selfish arse."

Caroline opened her eyes wide.

"No shit Sherlock. Oh, I'm sorry. What made you, erm when did you realise that?"

They exchanged a knowing look at each other.

"The other night when I stayed over at dads and Judith started going on at him because he wouldn't let her have another glass of wine. He kept saying it was for her own good and that it would hurt the baby. And she said she never really wanted the baby in the first place. And then he said that she would make a bad mother because she was lazy and dirty and the flat was a mess. It was horrible mum. And then I thought about what you are doing here with the baby, with Flora, and looking after me and keeping an eye on granny and visiting Kate. And you don't complain at all, not really. And the house isn't messy, other than my room."

Caroline pushed herself away from the table and walked over to the fridge. Her eyes were filling up with tears and she was on the verge of having a melt down. This was not something that she wanted Lawrence to witness.

"Thank you. Thank you for saying that. It really means a lot to me. Urm, we have cake and ice cream for dessert. Have you got room left?"

"Have I! Perfect. Thanks mum."

* * *

"Are you sure you will be alright with Flora while I go and see Kate?"

Lawrence looked up from the TV.

"Yeah. She's asleep isn't she and this walky talky thing will let me know if she wakes up."

"It is a baby monitor. And yes, you will hear her on that. But don't go racing upstairs as soon as she whimpers. Leave her a bit because she might fall back to sleep. Granny is only next door if you need her."

"Will I still get paid though if I have to go and get granny round to help?"

Caroline rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips.

"Yes, yes you will. Lawrence, Flora is your sister. You should be doing this for free."

"Technically she is …."

"Technically, I need to leave or visiting time will be over before I even get there."

She kissed the top of his head.

"Ring me if you need me. Bye. Bye bye."

* * *

Elizabeth was on the phone as Caroline walked past the desk and she smiled at her and waved enthusiastically. Her concentration lapsed as she watched her strut down the corridor and she found herself having to ask the caller to repeat himself.

Caroline opened the door quietly so she wouldn't disturb Kate if she was sleeping. She walked in smiling, looking straight over to the bed. It was empty. A fear gripped Caroline's chest and she struggled to breath. Her legs started to tremble and an animal like sound escaped from her mouth. She turned quickly to leave the room.

"Hello."

The voice stopped her in her tracks. As she turned to where it was coming from, she suddenly felt foolish. Kate was sitting in the high back chair near the window, wrapped in her dressing gown with a book on her lap.

"Oh my God Kate. I thought that you were, that you had, oh"

She flew over to the chair and dropped to her knees. Reaching out for her hands, she took them in her own and held them to her face, turning her head to kiss her fingers.

"Caroline, are you alright?"

Kate was bewildered.

"I am now. For a while, for a short while I thought … oh never mind what I thought. What are you doing sitting there, in that chair?"

"It's what people do. People sit in chairs and read books."

Caroline smiled and got up off the floor. She bent to kiss Kate, taking her time, her eyes closed. It seemed like so long ago that had held her in her arms and she longed to feel the closeness of her body once more.

"I know. I just never expected it. You look so well, so good, so pretty. How are you feeling?"

Kate went to stand up and Caroline moved forward to help her.

"A bit tired now if I am being honest."

As Kate stood to full height, she stumbled a little and Caroline instinctively wrapped her arms around her.

"I'm here. I've got you. Always."

At that moment, the door opened and Elizabeth walked in. She stopped in her tracks and watched the two women. The relationship they had was so special and she was almost envious.

"Not interrupting anything am I?"

Kate and Caroline laughed in unison.

"No, not at all. I'm just putting this one back to bed. It seems that she can't stand the exciting life she leads."

Holding hands, they walked slowly over to the bed and Caroline gently supported Kate as she sat on the bed.

"Better?"

"Much. How long will I feel like this Elizabeth? I just want to go home."

Elizabeth sat on the bed at the side of her and took hold of her hand.

"I know you do but you need to get stronger first. You're tiring so quickly because you aren't used to doing anything. You have been laid in bed for the last 3 weeks recovering from your accident and your operations. Tomorrow, you will be starting gentle physiotherapy and getting used to moving around again. The muscles in your legs are weak because you haven't used them. Once we are confident that you are able to look after yourself and you ae stronger we will talk about letting you go home."

"Be patient love. You have come such a long way in such a short space of time. You need to remember that. You were unconscious for 5 days after the accident. That's a big thing to overcome."

Caroline looked concerned.

"I know but I just want to go home to you and Flora. How is Flora? Is she with Celia?"

"No. Lawrence is looking after her."

Kate's head moved quickly and she looked straight at Caroline.

"No, really, where is she?"

"She is with Lawrence. I just said."

"You're being serious aren't you?"

Caroline placed her hands on her hips and stood in a defensive stance.

"Yes, totally serious. He has changed Kate. I mean really changed. You just wait until you see him. He is sorry for his behaviour and he just wants a chance to prove that."

"And you gave him that chance by leaving him alone with the baby?"

"He's hardly alone Kate. My mother is just next door. Flora will be fine."

Elizabeth was still holding Kate's hand and she snatched it away.

"I'm tired now. I just want to go to sleep."

Elizabeth stood up and helped Kate into bed, pulling the covers up over her. Sensing that things were about to get a little fraught, she made to leave.

"Have you got everything you need?"

"Yes thank you Elizabeth."

She touched Caroline's arm reassuringly and left the room.

"Kate, please. Don't be like this. You don't think I would leave the baby with Lawrence if I didn't think he could cope do you? Besides, she is fast asleep in the nursery."

Kate didn't answer and petulantly turned over, her back to Caroline.

"Kate."

She didn't answer and Caroline stood for a moment, unsure of what to do. Fighting back the tears, she quietly left the room and slowly walked down the corridor.

Elizabeth walked from behind the desk to meet her.

"Have you 2 settled your differences?"

Caroline shook her head.

"He won't let anything happen to the baby you know. He really is a sensible boy. I wouldn't leave Flora with him if I thought he wouldn't take good care of her. You know that don't you Elizabeth."

Sensing she was upset, Elizabeth gently stroked her upper arm.

"Of course I do. You need to remember that Kate will be feeling left out of Flora's life at the moment. She wants to be at home with her but she can't. She will be feeling almost jealous of you, of the relationship you are building with your daughter. And to hear that you have left her with Lawrence will be the last straw for her. She won't stay angry for long. She loves you Caroline and you love her. I can see that, anyone can. You really do have a special relationship, one that you need to cherish."

Caroline looked at her.

"I know. I really am lucky to have Kate. I was never, you know, I haven't always been err I was married once. To a man. To John. What a useless tosser he turned out to be."

Elizabeth laughed.

"I know. You've said. More than once."

"Have I? Oh, I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise. It doesn't matter who or what you are. You and Kate are married now and you have Flora and William and Lawrence. And you are very much in love. You don't see that too often. Now go back in there and make it up with her. My mother used to tell me to never let the sun go down on an argument. And she is right."

She almost shoved Caroline back the way she had just come.

"Go on. You'll only regret it if you don't."

* * *

Kate was sat up in bed when Caroline entered the room. She put her book down and looked at her.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too."

Kate moved over and patted the bed at the side of her. Caroline dropped her bag on the chair and sat on the bed, leaning into Kate.

"He won't let …"

Kate put her finger on Caroline's lips.

"Ssshhhh. Don't. I know. I know that he will take good care of her. I'm just angry that it isn't me. I should be the one at home listening for her, waiting for her waking up for a feed."

She shifted her weight onto her side, grimacing slightly, and faced Caroline. Slowly, her left hand moved up her arm and stroked her neck. Caroline groaned.

"Kate, stop. Do you know the effect you are having on me? I might not be able to stop myself."

"How do you know I want you to. God Caroline, I have missed you so much. Missed your touch and your taste and your smell. Missed your arms around me, your soft breath on my face in the middle of the night. I think I might go mad if I have to stay here much longer."

Caroline cupped Kate's chin and tenderly kissed her. Her tongue slipped between her lips and she savoured the moment, starting to explore her with her hands. She knew she had to stop and she reluctantly pulled away and put her hand on the back of Kate's head, pulling her into her chest.

"I know. Me too. But you need to get better, stronger. I need you home just as much as you want to come home but you need to be ready."

"It's just so damn hard though."

"I know it is. You just need to do as you are told, if that is at all possible. Now get some sleep. You look exhausted."

She kissed her again and hugged her close. Kate held her hand while Caroline stood up. She grudgingly let go.

"Night night. Love you."

Kate blew a kiss.

"Love you more."

* * *

"Sorted?"

Elizabeth stood up and took her cardigan from the back of the chair. She draped it around her shoulders.

Caroline nodded. She was smiling but she looked weary.

"Yep. Thank you Elizabeth. Thank you for encouraging me to go back in there."

"You are very welcome. I'll walk out with you if you can wait a while. My shift has just finished."

Caroline put her bag on the desk and leaned on her elbow. She waited while Elizabeth tidied away her papers. She looked younger than her 49 years and Caroline she found herself wondering whether her hair was natural or whether she dyed it.

"I just need to change. 2 ticks."

Elizabeth emerged from the changing rooms in a pair of jeans and a checked shirt. Her long brown hair which she always wore in a twisted bun was loose and curly, falling on her shoulders and framing her face. Caroline wasn't used to seeing her in anything but her dark blue uniform and she liked her style. She admired her loafers and gave a small nod, almost approvingly.

The two linked arms and they walked out towards the car park. Over the past few weeks, they had become fast friends and Caroline was very comfortable with her. In the small hours of the morning, when Caroline was at her lowest and Kate was at her most critical, she had really opened up to Elizabeth and shared her deepest thoughts and fears. They had covered some very eclectic topics from favourite foods to where they had travelled. Caroline had a feeling that their friendship would continue long after Kate had left the hospital.

"I'm glad you've patched up your differences. Life is too short. You wouldn't believe how many screwed up relationships and families I come across in this job. Even mine seems normal by comparison."

Caroline looked surprised.

"What do you mean? You and Dan are happy together aren't you? Benjamin and Samuel are healthy and happy and thriving aren't they? He can't be that bad, surely?"

Now Elizabeth was the one to look surprised.

"Who can't be?"

"Dan! You always speak highly of him. Well most of the time anyway."

"Dan isn't a he Caroline. Dan is short for Danielle."

Caroline suddenly became aware that she looked very stupid, standing there with her mouth open and her eyes wide. How could she not have picked up on that? How could she possibly not know that Elizabeth was gay?


	9. Chapter 9

Caroline carried on walking, her pace slower than before. She was trying to process what Elizabeth had just told her.

"So erm, so Benjamin and Samuel, Ben and Sam, the twins. Who's are erm they are ….."

"Adopted. When they were just 3 months old. I feel so stupid now Caroline. I thought you knew about me, about Dan. It must have been Kate that I told."

Elizabeth looked mortified and she stood facing Caroline with her hands stuffed deep in her pockets and her shoulders raised and tense.

"No, no, it's fine." Caroline held her hands up cocked her head to one side.

"I mean, who I am to judge anyone. After all, I am, well you know. Anyway. No. It doesn't matter one bit to me."

"Good because I would hate to think that this would change anything between you and me and Kate. Over the last month, I have come to really like you and Kate. I respect you. It would be nice to think that we might even keep in touch after Kate is released and be friends, you know the four of us and the kids."

Caroline slowly looked over at Elizabeth.

"Is that allowed? I mean doesn't it contravene any professional standards or anything? Not that I wouldn't want to keep in touch. I am so very grateful for everything you have done for Kate, for us as a family. It would be nice to meet up when all this is over, you know under normal circumstances, and for us to treat you all to a nice meal or something."

Elizabeth laughed.

"Of course it would be OK. Kate will no longer be one of my patients. Anyway, it's not like we will be having sex or anything is it."

She stopped and saw the look on Caroline's face.

"Oh my God. I am sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I can tell that you are not comfortable with this and that it has all been a shock to you. Listen, I am going to leave you here. I am off for the next 2 days but I will no doubt see you when I am back on shift on Monday. Take care and don't overdo it. Give my love to Kate."

Without another word, Elizabeth walked off down the corridor and Caroline stood watching her go. How could she not have known?

* * *

Caroline pulled up into the driveway and switched off the engine. She looked over at the house, at all the lights that were on and suddenly remembered that she had left Flora with Lawrence. It was only when she got out and started climbing the few steps to the front door that she noticed John's car and her heart skipped several beats. Perhaps something was wrong and Lawrence had called him. She was flustered by the time she had found her key and opened the front door.

"Lawrence. I'm home. Lawrence."

She knew her voice sounded frantic and she took several quick deep breaths before opening the living room door.

"Hi ma."

Lawrence was sat on the sofa with Flora fast asleep in his arms. John was quietly snoring in the arm chair. The room was a bit of a mess with a half-finished game of Monopoly on the table, a pizza box on the floor and a couple of empty glasses on the side table. But that was the least of her worries.

"Ssshh, I've just got them both to sleep."

Caroline smiled and she kissed the top of his head and then bend down and looked at Flora.

"Have they, has she been OK? She hasn't been any trouble has she? Is she fed and winded and changed and clean?"

"Calm down ma. Everything is just fine. She woke up about an hour ago and dad said she might be hungry so I fed her. And then she did this most almighty poo that sent everywhere so I changed her and then we sat at watched a film and then she fell asleep."

"I hope you haven't been letting her watch anything too violent. I don't want her growing up liking violent and scary films. And what's your father doing here? Where's granny and Alan?"

She stood back and smiled at him, feeling immensely proud.

"Dad and Judith had a row. On the phone. Apparently, she wants to stay with her sister for a bit longer and she wants him to pay the rent and some other bill. And dad said he didn't see why he had to because it was her flat. And granny and Alan have gone over to Halifax. Something about Gillian and Robbie and I think there might have been a sheep involved."

Caroline picked up Flora and gently rocked her.

"Well, I'm here now. You'd better clear away this mess and then wake your father up. I am not having him sleeping in my spare room when he has a perfectly good bed in his own flat. Well, it isn't his own flat technically and I am not even sure it is a good bed. But he isn't sleeping here."

And without giving Lawrence the chance to reply, she went to put Flora to bed.

Caroline hadn't yet moved Flora into the nursery. In truth, she had got used to her sleeping at the side of her. And she wanted Kate to have that experience when she came home from hospital. In truth, she liked having the baby in the same room - it was like having Kate next to her. And it wasn't doing her any harm.

She gently lay her in her crib and covered her with a blanket. Kissing her fingertips, she touched them on Flora's head.

"Night night little one."

As she was half way down the stairs, Lawrence popped his head round the living room door.

"I think we have a problem. Dad seems a bit too drunk to go home. I don't think he can drive. He could stay here couldn't he? In the spare room?"

Caroline closed her eyes slowly and inhaled very deeply. Calmly, she walked down the last few steps, went into the hallway and picked up the house phone from the table. She punched in a number and rolled her eyes at Lawrence, her free hand on her hip, her eyes seemingly scanning the ceiling.

"Can I order a taxi please. As soon as possible. It's for John Elliott. 46 Conway Drive, Harrogate. Postcode? It's HG3 2MC. 5 minutes? That's perfect. Thank you. Bye."

Picking up John's coat from the rack, she walked into the living room and threw it in his general direction.

"Here, get your coat on and get outside in the fresh air. The taxi will be here in 5 minutes. You can collect your car in the morning when you are sober."

"Caroline, this is my bloody ho ….. oh, wait. No it isn't anymore is it? Oh, gosh. I, err, I don't suppose I could be a house guest just for one evening can I?"

"You suppose right John because the answer is no. You gave up your rights to live here when you went off with that, with that, with Judith. I do not want you coming here and getting drunk in front of my children. I do not want you coming here full stop. Lawrence is old enough to meet you in town or somewhere. If you have a problem with Judith, that is exactly what it is. Your problem. It is nothing to do with us so please do not try to involve us. Now put on your coat and leave. The taxi will be here in …." She looked at her watch. "…. In less than 3 minutes."

"These things are never on bloody time anyway."

"I do not care John. Go. Leave. Get out."

Caroline stood to one side to allow John to pass. She majestically waved her arm to signal that she wanted him to leave.

"You haven't changed have you? You are just so stuck up and pompous and, well, so bloody you. We had some good times though didn't we Caroline? You and me? And the boys?"

"Yes, we had some good times. But they are all in the past now. Memories. And I have changed John and you need to accept it. I have changed. It took me a while but I am happier now than I have ever been. I am who I am, living my live as I want to."

"What? As a bloody lesbian? You talk about me acting inappropriately in front of the children? What about you Caroline?"

"You need to leave now John. I have said all I want to say. The children are perfectly happy with me, with Kate. Good night. Watch the steps. I do not want a repeat performance of the one your girlfriend gave me when she was too drunk to handle the steps."

"Piss off Caroline."

She closed the door and double locked it, leaning against it and sighing. Some things in her life never changed.

* * *

Something woke Caroline from her deep sleep. She groaned and looked at the clock. 07:20. Then she sat bolt upright. Her phone was ringing.

"Hello. Hello."

"Morning love. It's me."

"Mum. Is everything alright? How is Alan?"

"Oh, he's fine love. He's just gone downstairs to make me a cup of tea. I thought I would ring to see how you were."

Caroline lay her head back on the pillow and slowly closed her eyes.

"It's twenty past seven in the morning. I thought that something had happened to Alan, to you, to Kate."

"No you daft beggar." Celia laughed. "I just wanted to hear your lovely voice and to update you on the situation here at Halifax and let you know why me and Alan dashed over here last night."

"This had better be good mum because my heart is still banging in my chest. I thought …."

"Yes I know what you thought. Well now you know different. Anyway, back to Halifax. Gillian had a ewe in lamb and there were complications. So her and Robbie had to take it to somewhere to get it sorted you see. And Raff and Ellie were out with Harry so that meant that there was no one at the farm to look after Calamity."

Caroline was dumbfounded.

"So you and Alan dropped everything. Gillian let Alan drive all the way over to Halifax to sit with the baby because some sheep was having a few problems pushing and she had to be taken to some vet or something. Mum, that woman is unbelievable. Does she not know that you both struggle in the dark with your eyes? What a selfish …."

"Well no harm was done. Anyway, while me and Alan are here we are going to stay for a few days. I don't suppose you have any objections do you?"

Caroline ran her free hand through her hair and stared up at the ceiling.

"Actually mum, actually yes I do. What if I had had plans today? You know that Kate is still in hospital don't you? And you know that I only have this week free before I am back at work? What am I supposed to do with the baby?"

"I'm sorry love but that isn't my problem. I did say that me and Alan would help out when we could and so far we have. Only for the next few days we can't. So you need to make other arrangements. Anyway, I have to go now because my tea is getting cold. Bye love. Bye bye."

"Mum! Mum, you can't …. Oh, great. Thanks a lot mum."

Her raised voice had awoken Flora and she started getting grizzly. Caroline reached into the crib and picked her up.

"That was granny. Yes it was. She is over at the farm with those sheep so it's just you and me today. God knows how we are going to manage but we will have to somehow. Come on. Let's see if that brother of yours is up and getting ready for school. And then we can get you some breakfast and me some breakfast and then we can go and see your other mummy and see whether she has had a better start to the day.

* * *

As it happened, Kate had had a better start to the day. When Caroline arrived, Kate was on the corridor with her physiotherapist. She was taking tentative steps with a walking frame, grimacing as she bore weight on her injured leg. Her face lit up when she saw Caroline walking towards her.

"Look at you! I'm so proud of you. No, don't let me stop you. I'll wait in the room with the baby."

"Actually Caroline, you might want to watch what I am doing with Kate."

The physiotherapist turned to face her and steadied the frame with his right hand.

"Kate is making great progress but she is starting to drag her left leg. Not much but she isn't lifting it as high as her other leg and bending it at the knee. This may cause her to have a bit of a limp it we don't correct it now. I need you to get onto her when you get home. Continue to give the positive messages that I am giving her. Get her to walk towards a mirror so that she can see what she looks like. Help her, support her. Be there for her."

"Of course I will. Always. I will always be there for her. I want her to get better, stronger. I want to get her home where she belongs. When will that be? Have you any idea?"

Caroline looked imploringly at Steven.

"I am afraid it isn't my call Caroline. All I can do is write in Kate's notes about how much progress she is making. And to date, it is amazing. After that, it is for Doctor Malik to make the call as to when she can be allowed home. I know that her scans are very positive and her brain is almost down to its normal size. The swelling has subsided at a pleasing pace. And her caesarean wound is all but healed now. The only thing stopping her from coming home is her mobility. We need to be confident that she can cope on her own when she goes home."

Kate gave a small cough.

"I am here you know. I might not be fully fit physically but I can hear you. I can understand what you are saying and I am old enough to be able to answer for myself."

Caroline put her arm around Kate's shoulders.

"I'm sorry my love. I didn't mean to talk over your head. Of course you should be a part of this conversation."

She kissed her tenderly on the temple.

"What are your thoughts about this? What do you want Kate?"

"Do you really need to ask? I want to come home to you and Flora. Even Lawrence. I will do anything I need to in order for Dr Malik to discharge me."

"Anything?"

Caroline raised her eyebrows and smirked at Kate.

"Well, almost anything. Come on, walk with me to the nurses station and back again."


	10. Chapter 10

When Caroline next saw Elizabeth, she had all but forgotten their last meeting. Well that wasn't strictly true but she had had a few days for it all to sink in and she had replayed conversations over and over in her head until she had found ones that had contained blatant references to Dan and Elizabeth. Truth be known, she was still angry at herself for not picking up on it.

"How have you been?"

Elizabeth opened her arms and Caroline instinctively fell into the hug, gently rubbing her back.

"Fine. Fine. How are you?"

She stepped back and looked at Elizabeth who was already changed and in her uniform, her hair pulled back in a low bun.

"Oh, you know. Another day, same old crap. Are you looking forward to going back to work?"

Caroline groaned.

"No, not in the least. I have missed the children, the school, even some of the staff. But it will be so hard to tear myself away from Flora. And visiting Kate has become the highlight of my day. I still have no clue what I am going to do with Flora."

"Have you thought about putting her in a nursery?"

Caroline folded her arms across her chest.

"Kate absolutely hates that idea. It wouldn't even be open for discussion. Trust me."

"OK, but hear me out. There is a nursery at the side of the hospital that is mostly used by staff. They do have a few people who work nearby who use it but in the man it is nurses and doctors. It is accessible from inside the hospital and we do have some of the team who spend their lunch breaks in there, breast feeding and the likes. "

Caroline was suddenly interested.

"So err, so I could drop Flora off before work and Kate could pop in during the day and then I could pick Flora up when I had finished work?"

Elizabeth nodded.

"Exactly. Why don't you talk to Kate about it? I am not even sure if there are any places available in the tiny tots room. But you can start the discussion. It would be a perfect solution, a temporary solution, to your situation."

"I will. Thank you Elizabeth. I don't know why I didn't think about it before. And I thought I was the smart one."

She winked at her and walked off down the corridor to see Kate.

Elizabeth watched her go, admiring the way she strutted when she walked and the outline of her thighs in her pencil skirt and stiletto heels.

* * *

Kate was over by the window when Caroline entered and she tentatively turned around to see who it was. The smile on her face told her how happy she was to see her and she started to walk over towards the door. Caroline noticed that she was walking unaided and she had to swallow hard to stop the tears from flowing. She felt like a proud parent watching her child take her first steps.

Kate fell into her arms and the temptation to kiss her was too much. Holding her close, Caroline pressed her lips onto Kate's, gently stroking her cheek with her finger. Kate returned the kiss with passion and her tongue slipped into Caroline's mouth, lightly caressing the inside. Caroline moaned and pulled away.

"God Kate. I feel like a teenager on a first date. All I want to do is ….."

She leaned in close and whispered something into Kate's ear and she giggled, blushing slightly.

"Mrs McKenzie Dawson! I am shocked."

Caroline smiled.

"So am I. I can't believe what is going through my head. I just want "

The door opened and the pair stood ramrod straight like 2 guilty children.

"Is she up for it then?"

Elizabeth entered the room with Kate's medication in a small plastic cup and popped it on the top of her locker. Kate looked confused.

"Up for what? Caroline, what's going on?"

Elizabeth suddenly looked very awkward.

"Oh, you haven't told her? I'm sorry."

Caroline looked embarrassed.

"No, no I haven't had chance."

Kate sat down on the edge of the bed and Caroline sat at the side of her and picked up her hand.

"What's all this about Caroline? It's nothing bad I hope?"

Caroline looked down at the floor and pursed her lips. She took a deep breath and faced Kate who was suddenly very worried.

"So you are not going to like this but here goes. Elizabeth and I, well we were just chatting about me going back to work and Flora and nurseries and things. And she mentioned that there was a nursery next to the hospital. A very good nursery. And then she asked if I had considered it and, well, I said I hadn't but that I hadn't ruled it out and I would talk to you."

Kate looked annoyed.

"So you discussed putting Flora, our daughter, into a nursery without even consulting with me? Caroline, you know how I feel about nurseries. I don't want to do it. I won't do it."

Elizabeth discreetly backed out of the room and mouthed "Sorry" to Caroline. She put up her hand in acknowledgement.

"It wasn't like that Kate. It was hardly a discussion. I just happened to mention that I didn't know what I was going to do with Flora, you know, on a more permanent basis when I went back to work. Elizabeth, well she mentioned the nursery and I said that I would discuss it with you. End of. There was nothing more to it than that. It sounds perfect Kate. You can walk to it from here so you would be getting some exercise. And you can see Flora anytime you want."

Kate's eyes lit up.

"Really?"

"Well I expect there will be some limitations, some visiting hours. But I'm sure that they won't mind you going down to feed her at lunch time. We would have to ask them. We would need to know what their ground rules are. And we don't even know if there are any places, if they can take her. It's a very popular nursery and it might be full. So we might not have to worry or debate it."

Caroline stopped to gauge Kate's reaction. She was pushing herself up off the bed.

"Let's go and ask."

"What, now?

"Yes, now."

* * *

Leaving Flora with strangers was very difficult but Caroline knew it was the only option until Kate was released from hospital and was well enough to look after her on her own at home. She handed over the changing bag, which had suddenly multiplied in size, and gave Flora a kiss.

"Her mummy will probably pop down to see her at lunch time."

The young nursery nurse looked bemused.

"She's in the hospital recovering from an accident."

"So you're not her mum?"

Caroline moved awkwardly from one foot to the other and looked around for the lady who had met with her and Kate when they first enquired about a place.

"Yes, yes, I am her mum. I am Flora's mum. She has 2 mums. It's complicated. Well, actually it's not that complicated really. We are gay, Kate and I, her other mummy, and so Flora has 2 mums. So now you know that, do you need me to do anything else only I need go get to work."

Caroline was suddenly feeling very accomplished with what she had just said but was anxious to get off.

"No thank you. Flora will be fine with us, won't you Flora? Give your mummy a kiss."

Caroline bent down and kissed her head.

"Bye Flora. Bye bye."

And without looking back, Caroline almost ran down out of the door and jumped in her jeep.

With a deep sigh, she started the engine and slowly pulled away.

"Nope, no, she will be absolutely fine. I know she will."

* * *

The day dragged for Caroline and she watched the clock from 4pm until she was due to leave at 530pm to pick up Flora. She didn't normally work that late – she was usually home by 5pm so that she could cook tea after which she would retire to her office and finish off her paperwork. But she wanted to catch up on what had been happening at work while she had been away. And if she left Flora until the nursery shut up at 6pm, she could nip along and visit Kate.

Caroline had no trouble parking and made her way to the nursery, suddenly anxious to see Flora. She had really missed her and she was desperate to pick her up and see Kate. It had been a long day but catching sight of Flora through the window, sat in her car seat and waiting for her, lightened her mood.

"Has she been OK?"

The words were thrown in the general direction of the staff who were tidying away and she dashed in and scooped up Flora. She quickly fastened into the car seat and was heading back to the door before anyone responded to her.

"Yes, she has been fine. Her mum, her other mum, dropped by at lunchtime to feed her and spend some time with her. And she has had a couple of long naps. Oh and 3 bottles and 2 dirty nappies, one of them really smelly and a little bit loose."

Caroline stopped and turned around.

"Oh, right, oh thank you. Do you err, did you really need to tell me that? Well, I suppose you did actually. I need to know don't I? I'll keep an eye on the poo situation. Not literally. Anyway thank you. Thank you for having her, for looking after her. I will see you tomorrow."

And without waiting for an answer she was gone and heading to the main hospital and the lift lobby.

Although she was the head of a very successful independent school, she still amazed herself at how flustered she got sometimes, especially in the company of younger adults. The panic must have been evident in her voice.

"I'll keep an eye on the poo. Really Caroline?"

* * *

Kate was dozing when Caroline entered the room and she stirred when she heard her footsteps.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

She stepped forwards and kissed her with a longing and yearning that she knew she would never get used to.

"How have you been?"

"Bored."

Kate looked like a sullen child.

"I went to see Flora at lunch time and spent an hour with her. It was wonderful. I miss her when she's not here. And I have been to physio in the pool today which was a change to walking up and down those pretend flights of stairs."

Caroline picked up her hand and kissed her finger tips, one by one.

"Be patient. You have come so far in such as short space of time. It will only be a matter of days before you are fit to come home, you mark my words."

Kate pushed herself up in the bed and looked longingly at the car seat. Caroline took the hint and unfastened Flora and handed her over.

"I know. It's just that spending time on my own with Flora today has got me wanting to come home and be a full time mummy. I've wanted this for so long. And now it's finally here, now that I finally am, I can't enjoy it. Not properly anyway."

Caroline looked down at her wife and daughter and smiled. Her eyes were full of so much love and she felt like the luckiest woman alive.

"I want that more than anything too. I want to come home to you every night and have you cook my tea and bring me a glass of wine and rub my feet."

Kate tutted loudly.

"I will do no such thing Mrs McKenzie-Dawson. Hey, Elizabeth was on duty earlier and we were chatting, like you do. Anyway, she has invited us over to hers for a meal with the kids and Dan, once I get out of here. I think that would be great, don't you? Caroline?"

Caroline was looking at a spot on the wall above Kate's head, trying to concentrate on something else.

"What? Oh, sorry. Err, do you really think they are our type Kate, that we will get on with them? We only know Elizabeth in her professional capacity and we haven't even met Dan and the kids are, well, the kids don't even belong to them. They could be, well, you know.

Kate looked astounded.

"They could be what? Feral? Savages? Caroline, you are so bigoted sometimes. You only spent a short time with Greg and you never really spoke to him, not properly. Does this mean you think our daughter is, well, you know."

Kate made inverted commas with her fingers.

"Of course not Kate. Our daughter is perfect. Beautiful. Not that Elizabeth's children are ugly. Well actually, they could be."

She paused for a brief second and took a deep breath. Nervously, she started to run the edge of her jacket through her fingers.

"I think Elizabeth has, that she is, well, that she has a thing for me. A bit of a crush."

Kate burst out laughing.

"You're not serious are you?"

The look on Caroline's face told her she was and she tried to keep a straight face.

"Oh, you are."

Caroline was mortified.

"It's not funny Kate. I get the distinct impression that she wants more than just friendship."

Kate sniggered and covered her mouth.

"So this invitation to dinner then, with her and Dan. What do you think that is about? Perhaps you think that she a bowl on a table at the bottom of the stairs and she expects us all to throw our car keys in it on the way in?"

Caroline gasped.

"What, like a swingers par …. You are kidding aren't you Kate. Oh my God. What if she is. What if her and Dan are "

"Caroline, stop. I was joking. Elizabeth and Dan will just be your normal run of the mill gay couple with 2 kids. And I am sure that Elizabeth fancies you no more than she fancies me."

"Don't joke about things like that Kate."

Caroline dug her hands deep into her pockets and started to walk around the room.

"I can't put my finger on it Kate. It's just a feeling I get when she looks at me. She sort of, well, you know, undresses me with her eyes."

Kate sat upright and stared open mouthed.

"You really are serious aren't you? Caroline, you've got to stop this. Up until the time you knew that Elizabeth was gay, you used to say what a perfectly lovely woman she was. How kind and caring and thoughtful. And now that she has outed herself to you, you suddenly think that she fancies you. Caroline, you are beautiful, charming, sexy, gorgeous. But you are not everyone's cup of tea. Not every gay woman will fall for you. That's not how it works."

"Oh, and I thought that I was irresistible to man and woman alike."

She smiled and went across and kissed Kate and then Flora.

"I hope it doesn't come to the point where I have to say I told you so Kate."


	11. Chapter 11

Kate continued to improve and she worked hard in all her physio sessions. She was desperate to be discharged and a week later she felt like crying when Dr Malik told her that she was ready to go home.

"You need to persist with your exercises and there will be follow up appointments. But sitting here all day doing nothing is not helping your recovery."

Kate frowned.

"I would hardly say I had been doing nothing all day. Most evenings I feel like I have run the equivalent of a marathon. But I get your point. Thank you Doctor. Thank you for everything."

He smiled at her and held out his hand. Kate took it and gently squeezed is she was shaking it.

"You are more than welcome Kate. This is what I am here for. I will get someone to come and speak to you and talk you through some do's and don'ts in the first few days when you get home. I don't want you over doing it because that would be silly wouldn't it. "

"So I can go home today? Really?"

Dr Malik smiled and nodded his head.

"You take care of yourself Kate and give my best wishes to your lovely wife."

"I will doctor. I certainly will."

Kate was so excited. She was going home!

* * *

Alan and Celia were having breakfast and discussing the past few weeks. They felt like they had been put into a bag and shaken up. The accident had taken its toll on the whole family.

"Celia, can I ask you something? How do you feel about Kate? Right now. Today."

Alan looked quizzically at Celia and she set down her tea cup and slowly lifted her head to look at him.

"Why do you ask?"

"Well, when they were getting married, the ladies, you didn't want any part of it. You sat here in your little flat with Lawrence and flatly refused to go. You said that Kate was making a fool of Caroline. But now you talk about her as though she is the best thing since sliced bread. Kate is number one on your favourite list. So what's changed?"

Celia put an extra spoon of sugar into her tea and stirred it thoughtfully.

"Oh, I don't know. Well, I suppose I do. You know that day when we rushed to the hospital after our Caroline called, and Kate was in the operating theatre? I thought my heart would break looking at Caroline's face. She was so lost and frightened and alone. I don't think I have ever seen her like that in, oh, in a long time. And while Kate has been in hospital, I have seen another side to Caroline that I thought she had left behind her when she moved to university. A vulnerable side that has left her wide open."

She stopped and looked up at Alan.

"Am I making sense?"

He nodded and she carried on.

"I thought this was all a fad you see. When you've been married to someone for as long as she had been married to John and then they cheat on you, it does things to your head. God knows that I had first-hand experience. I just thought she was besotted with her and with the idea of being different. Like she was treating Kate as a novelty."

Alan put down his fork and stared at Celia.

"I had no idea you thought like that. But Caroline tried to open up to you when she was a young un didn't she? Did that mean anything?"

He raised his eyebrows but Celia didn't answer. She still felt guilty for not offering Caroline any support when she was in her late teens. She had been more bothered about what the neighbours would think.

"Anyhow, now I know that she does truly love her and that she wants to spend the rest of her life with her. And I know as much as anyone that true love doesn't come round very often. So I need to be here for her. We both do."

She reached across the table and grabbed Alan's hands.

"I say let bygones be bygones. What has passed has passed. They deserve a new start in life."

Alan squeezed Celia's hands and stood up from the chair. He leaned forward and kissed her.

"I love you."

"I know you do. And I love you too."

* * *

Beverley popped her head around the office door.

"I am so sorry to disturb you but Kate, err Mrs McKenzie-Dawson is on the phone. I think it's urgent."

The look on Beverley's face and her tone of voice panicked Caroline and she took off her glasses and shuffled some papers. Looking round the table, she saw 10 pairs of eyes looking back at her, waiting to see what she would do next. She had regular meetings with the children who had been elected to be head girl and head boy from each year. It was her way of finding out what was happening in her school – latest trends, any crazes, bullying, that sort of thing. She stood up from the table and straightened her jacket.

"Excuse me for just one moment will you please. I need to take this phone call. Talk about the idea of having a summer music festival amongst yourselves and I will be right back."

As soon as she had closed her office door behind her, she almost ran to the phone and grabbed it up off the desk.

"Kate, it's me. Are you there? What's wrong?"

"And good afternoon to you too. Nothing's wrong Caroline. In fact it is the complete opposite."

Caroline's shoulders visibly relaxed and she raised her eyes to the ceiling and slowly closed them.

"But Beverley said, she came into my office into a meeting and said "

"Caroline, I can come home. Today. Now. Can you come and get me?"

Caroline put the phone on her shoulder and looked at Beverley, a single tear sliding down her face.

"She's coming home."

Putting the phone back to her ear, she nodded and smiled.

"Caroline, are you still there?"

Smiling, Caroline laughed.

"Sorry, yes, yes I am. Of course I can come and get you."

She looked over at Beverley who was busy flicking through a large desk diary.

"You have a meeting with William Clayton's parents at 3pm."

"Oh, they can wait. Cancel it please Beverley. Tell them I have an urgent meeting and get them to come in tomorrow. Kate, don't move. Give me 10 minutes to finish off with my heads and I will be with you before you have even had chance to pack."

She didn't wait for her to say goodbye and rushed straight back into her office. She was as desperate as Kate for her to be home.

* * *

Kate was sat in the chair, her bag packed and on the floor beside her. She turned when she heard the door open, expecting to see Caroline. It was Elizabeth.

"I hear someone is going home."

Kate nodded and Elizabeth smiled at her. She handed Kate a letter.

"I am so pleased for you. Here. this is for your doctor. Someone needs to drop it in the surgery. There's no rush. It's a detailed report of all your injuries and has a recommendation for you to continue physio until your leg is stronger."

Kate took it and placed it on top of her bag.

"Now, I need you to listen to me while I run through a few things. I know it's 5 weeks since you had your accident but as things go, it was pretty serious. You shouldn't suffer any more side effects as a result of your head injury but if you do – if you start to feel sick or dizzy or lightheaded – you should tell someone immediately. It may be that you are overdoing things or haven't eaten or drunk enough, but you must make someone aware. Is that clear?"

Kate nodded her head, feeling like a school girl getting reprimanded.

"And no driving, especially on your own, until you have finished physio sessions. "

"Seriously? But I only have a little Fiat 500. I can steer it with one finger. It doesn't take any effort."

"Not even in your little car. No."

Kate started to chew the inside of her lip. She was about to protest but the look on Elizabeth's face told her that it wouldn't do her any good.

"And drinking. Do you drink much Kate?"

Kate frowned.

"Not really. I like the occasional gin and tonic."

"Well, cut back on the gin if you are having one. Just for a while. "

Kate groaned.

"You'll be telling me next that I can't eat chocolate or bread or anything else that I like."

"Not at all. But if you don't do as you are told, as you have been directed by Dr Malik, you could seriously impede your recovery. We are discharging you from hospital and you are over the worst of your injuries but you are not what we would call fighting fit. Is that clear?"

Kate nodded and glanced at her watch. Caroline would be here soon and then they could pick up Flora and go home to be a proper family.

"Is everything packed? Have you checked your locker?"

"Yes. I'm just glad that I asked Caroline to bring me some clothes. I would feel a little bit silly leaving in my pyjamas."

Elizabeth laughed.

"It wouldn't matter what you wore Kate. You would still look lovely."

She blushed and turned her head, busying herself with the contents of her bag.

"I will really miss you, you know. I will miss sitting here with you of an evening and putting the world to rights. Caroline is really lucky to have you. But I'm sure she knows that."

Kate didn't know what to say. It was one thing to tell her she was lovely but quite another to start telling her how much she would miss her. Her tone made her feel a little uneasy.

"I bet you say that to everyone you nurse. It must be difficult for you though. You see people when they are at their most vulnerable. I can imagine that it would be very rewarding to see someone get better and go home to their family, knowing that you have played such an important part in that process."

Elizabeth sat on the edge of the bed opposite Kate.

"It is. But there are some patients you identify with more than others. Some who you know that you will never forget, who you will actually miss not seeing every day. Kate, I don't think you realise how important you have become to me. You and Caroline. Do you know, I saw her when she was at her lowest, when she was scared that you might not make it. I really connected with her, understood how she was feeling. You don't get that with everyone that comes through these doors."

"We are so grateful for everything you have done for us Elizabeth. And I know that Caroline would echo that."

"Echo what?"

The door opened and a large bouquet of flowers appeared with Caroline's head barely visible through the fronds.

"Caroline! I was just telling Elizabeth how grateful we are for the care I have received."

She almost looked visibly relieved not to be in the room on her own with Elizabeth.

"Absolutely! And these are for you. I could never repay you but I hope that these show you how much you are appreciated."

She gave the flowers to Elizabeth and leaned forward to kiss her cheek. Elizabeth turned her head unexpectedly and their lips brushed. Caroline pulled back quickly and coughed. She fumbled in her bag and pulled out her car keys. She turned them over in her hand and dropped them back in again.

"Anyway, are we, are you ready? Are you ready to go Kate? I only put 30 minutes in the meter and we need to pick Flora up."

Moving forward, Caroline picked up Kate's bag from the floor and held out her arm. Kate slowly rose from the chair and instinctively linked up with her. They stood side by side and Caroline planted a kiss on her cheek and squeezed her hand. She opened her other arm to Elizabeth.

"Thank you again Elizabeth. We really are very grateful aren't we Kate?"

Moving forward, the 3 of them embraced in a slightly awkward group hug.

"Right. Let's go. Sorry to be in such a rush. Bye Elizabeth. Keep in touch."

"Bye ladies. Take care of yourselves, especially you Kate. I'll ring or text you or something."

Caroline glanced briefly over her shoulder and raised her hand to her.

"Goodbye Elizabeth. And thanks again for everything."

Caroline and Kate walked slowly down the corridor, each one looking at the other and smiling.

"God this feels good. You and me going home. Weird isn't it?"

"I know. A nice weird though. Did you mean what you just said? That you want to keep in touch with Elizabeth?"

"I'm not sure that I did. For the foreseeable future, I want you all to myself. I don't want to share you with anyone."

"Anyone? Not even Flora?"

Kate pouted and Caroline kissed her full on the mouth.

"Well, maybe just for a few hours a day."

* * *

"They're here. Alan, they're here. Kate's here. And Caroline . And the baby."

Celia rushed towards the front door, shouting in the general direction of the kitchen. She flung the door open and went to help Caroline.

While Caroline was helping Kate out of the car, Celia started to unfasten the baby seat. Carrying Flora inside, she stopped at the top step and turned around.

"Do you want to do this together? It will be the first time that all 3 of you have been in the house, you know, all at the same time."

Caroline smiled.

"How lovely mum. Thank you. Yes, that would be, err, that would be very nice."

She held out her free arm and Celia hung the car seat on it.

"Give me a shout if you need anything. I'll bring the bags in."

Kate looked down at Caroline and smiled.

"How sweet is your mother?"

Caroline groaned.

"Don't get used to it because it won't last. Trust me on this one"

They laughed and Caroline kissed her as they stepped across the threshold, the three of them as a family.

* * *

Caroline gently nudged Kate who was snoring softly.

"Come on sleeping beauty. Time for bed."

Kate stretched her legs out in front of her and yawned.

"What time is it?"

"A little after 10pm."

Caroline turned and faced Kate and put her hand behind her head, supporting the weight by resting her elbow on the back of the settee.

"I am just not used to this hectic lifestyle. Does Flora need feeding?"

Caroline stroked the side of Kate's face with her finger.

"Don't you worry. She will wake up when she is hungry. It is usually about 5 minutes after I have dropped off to sleep but she will let us know."

Kate looked at Caroline, her brown eyes wide.

"It is OK that I move her to my side of the bed isn't it? I mean it will make it easier for me to feed her when she wakes up."

Caroline kissed the tip of her nose.

"Of course it is. It's about time that you took your turn with the night feeds. I've been doing it for the last month or so."

She smiled to let her know she was playing with her.

"Come on. Bed."

"Is that an order Miss?"

"Yup, absolutely. I have waited too long for this. I don't think I can wait much longer."


	12. Chapter 12

Kate bent down and peered into Flora's carry cot. She was breathing gently, her face the image of perfection. She smiled and looked over at Caroline.

"I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight with her so close to me."

Caroline winked.

"I don't think you will sleep much tonight with me so close to you."

Kate gave a nervous laugh and she picked up her nightie and went into the bathroom, aware that Caroline was watching her every move. She closed the door quietly and leaned on the sink, looking at herself in the bathroom mirror.

Unzipping her trousers, she pensively touched the scar on her stomach, a crude line that went vertically from the bottom of her belly button to the top of her underwear. The result of her beautiful daughter being born so dramatically but nevertheless an ugly scar she didn't think she would ever grow to accept as part of her own body.

Quickly, she undressed and pulled her nightie over her head, stopping briefly to pull her hair back into a pony tail. She picked up her toothbrush and took longer than usual to clean her teeth, all the while staring at her reflection in the mirror, a thousand thoughts running through her head.

Caroline was sat up in bed reading when Kate entered the bedroom. She looked at her over the top of her glasses.

"OK?"

"Mm mmm"

Kate nodded back and climbed into bed, pulling the covers tight over herself. She yawned very obviously.

"I can't believe how tired I am. I am going to try to get some sleep before this little one wakes me up. Night night."

Caroline leaned forward to kiss Kate but her mouth met the side of her head as she turned over to face the other way. She suddenly felt awkward.

"Night then."

She was no longer reading her book, but just staring at the words on the page. Random words caught her eye and she tried to make a sentence of them but gave up. Caroline hadn't expected a night of wild abandoned sex but she had been looking forward to some cuddling and kissing. Oh well, perhaps Kate had exhausted herself. It had been a very emotional day for her and Caroline needed to be supportive of that.

* * *

True to form, Flora woke up within an hour of Kate dropping off to sleep. Caroline was still awake but she quietly placed her book on her chest and closed her eyes as though she had dropped off while still reading.

Kate sat bolt upright in bed and looked around confused. And then she grinned as she became aware of what had woken her up. Swinging her legs out of bed, she sat and looked into the cot, her eyes looking straight into those of her daughter.

"Hello little one. Are you hungry? Come on, let's get you sorted before you wake up your mummy and your big grumpy brother."

Caroline moaned and opened her eyes.

"Sorry, we didn't mean to wake you."

Taking off her glasses and picking up her book, Caroline smiled.

"No, no, I as just resting my eyes. I know how this little lady works. Do you want me to err, shall I help?"

"It's OK. We've got this thank you."

"Oh, OK. Shout me if you need me."

"I think I can manage to feed her on my own."

And Kate left the bedroom cradling Flora close to her. Had Kate just been off with her or was she over-reacting? She decided it was the latter and put her book down. Within minutes, she was fast asleep.

* * *

Caroline was just finishing drinking her tea when Kate came into the kitchen. Flora was crying very loudly and Kate was doing her best to quieten her.

"Someone doesn't sound very happy. Have you changed her?"

"Yes. She's all clean and dry.

"Rubbed her back? Sometimes she has trapped wind hours after she had fed."

"Yes."

"Well maybe she is just hungry."

Kate glared at Caroline.

"To coin your phrase Caroline. No shit Sherlock."

Caroline held up her hands in defeat.

"I am only trying to help. I have had more experience of looking after her than you have Kate. "

Kate looked open mouthed.

"Well perhaps you ought to take her and look after her then. Oh no, wait. You have a very important job to do, sitting in your office all day shuffling papers and "

She stopped, suddenly aware that she had gone too far.

"I'm sorry Caroline. I just don't know what to do. I hate seeing her crying like this."

Caroline stood up and opened her arms. Kate placed Flora in them and went to warm her a bottle. Walking round the kitchen, Caroline bounced Flora up and down gently and made little cooing noises to her. After a few minutes she quietened down and the only noises she made were little sucking noises. Kate was astounded.

"Wow Caroline. I am amazed. I have never seen you with a baby before. You certainly do have a way with children."

Caroline smiled.

"They know, you know. Babies know when you are upset and anxious. They can sense it. You just need to be calm and reassure them."

"You're not kidding. I'm sorry Caroline. I don't know what I got so upset about. I guess I'm not used to this. I just need some practice."

Caroline handed Flora back to her and Kate put the teat to her mouth. She opened her mouth wide and starting feeding.

"Are you sure you will be OK with her? My mother is just next door. At least I think she is. She didn't say her and Alan had any plans for the rest of the week. You can give her a shout."

Kate's heckles were up again.

"I think I am more than capable of looking after my own daughter thank you."

"Kate, why are you being so snippy?"

She ignored her and went to sit on the sofa.

"Fine. Well, you only need to ring my mother. And you know where I will be. Beverly has my permission to interrupt me whenever so call me if you need anything."

Kate mocked.

"My permission. Oooo, listen to your mummy Flora."

Caroline was hurt. She put her cup in the sink and ran some water into it, splashing the front of her blouse.

"Shit."

Taking a moment to calm down, she walked towards Kate, determined not to slam out of the house.

"Right, well, I'll be off then. Try to get some rest when Flora is sleeping. You'll be surprised at how tired you will get. And ring me if you need anything. I'll check in at lunch time."

She leaned over and kissed them both on the foreheads and walked back up into the kitchen to get her bag.

"Bye girls. Have a nice day."

Caroline was reluctant to leave, unsure as to whether Kate was ready for all this. Twice she hesitated before finally closing the front door behind her and leaving the house.

Kate was oblivious to anything except Flora who lay in her arms, suddenly milk drunk.

* * *

Caroline felt anxious all day. Not because Kate was on her own with Flora but because of the tension that she had felt before she left for work. Kate had only been out of hospital 24 hours and she was new to the parenting role. She chided herself and promised to be more patient and understanding when she got home.

However, when she passed Michael Dobson in the corridor, all her pent up anger and frustration was vented and she almost bit his head off when he asked how things were at home.

"Fine! Yes, yes, they are fine. Why wouldn't they be? Christ Michael, if I didn't know you any better I would think that you were waiting for Kate to fail. For us both to fail. Well, hard luck. That is not going to happen. No. No way."

She straightened her jacket and with a flick of her head she carried on walking back to her office, nodding courteously at one of her sixth form pupils. Michael's eyes followed her down the corridor. He was unsure what to make of their exchange.

Once she was in her own sanctuary, Caroline shut the door and leaned heavily on it. She slowly closed her eyes and breathed slowly for a few moments. She didn't care about Michael bloody Dobson but she did care that she had publicly lost her cool and called him out in front of other people.

Standing tall, she smiled to herself at the one picture that suddenly entered her head. She was in her office with Kate, their lips were touching, and her hand was underneath her blouse on her breast. They had both been so overcome with passion, both so willing to take it to another level. Earlier that same day she had told John she was seeing someone and then later on that evening she had outed herself. That had been the turning point for her, the day when had finally admitted to herself that she was in love with Kate. And now she realised that she loved Kate more than ever.

Walking over to her desk, she picked up her phone.

"Kate. Hello. Listen, I just wanted to say"

"Sorry."

Caroline was floored by the response and she lifted the phone from her ear and looked at the screen.

"Sorry?"

"Yes me too."

"No, no, I meant, oh never mind. I miss you."

There was silence and she heard Kate gasping very quickly, trying to hold back her tears.

"Are you OK? Kate?"

There was a deep intake of breath and Kate answered.

"Yes. No. Oh I don't know. I feel so, I don't even know. After you left for work, Flora went down for a nap and I tidied the breakfast pots away. Then I sat and read for a little while. And Flora woke up so I fed her and cuddled her. And then she slept some more. And then I just sat and waited for her to wake up. The thing is Caroline, I should be doing something shouldn't I? All new mums complain about being too busy, that they don't have enough time to get dressed. That the house is a mess and no one is getting fed apart from the baby. Well I must be doing something wrong because quite frankly, I'm bored. How awful does that sound?"

Caroline laughed.

"Oh Kate. There's no need to feel like that. You just have a very good baby who behaves herself. Believe you me, when Lawrence was born, I don't think I got dressed for 5 straight days in a row. I didn't know whether I was coming or going. And I had already had one baby before him."

"Really? You in your pyjamas for 5 days. Oh, I can't imagine that Dr Mackenzie-Dawson."

Now it was Kate's turn to laugh.

"Listen, I need to get out of the house. The fresh air will be good for Flora. What do you want for your tea?"

"Surprise me. I will be home no later than half past five."

"OK. I'll take a walk down to the shops and see if anything takes my fancy. See you later. Bye."

"Take care. Bye. Bye bye."

Caroline hung up, suddenly feeling a lot more relaxed than 10 minutes earlier. Her job now was to support Kate and reassure her that she was a great mum doing a great job.

* * *

Kate bundled Flora into the pram and set off down the road, a new mum proud to show off her baby. She smiled at people who were passing and looked lovingly into the pram. In the months that she had been living with Caroline, she had never walked to the shops. She had always driven. She felt almost like a visitor on her own street.

Stopping at the crossing, she pressed the button and patiently waited for the lights to change and the green man to appear. Hearing the buzzer of the pelican crossing, she stepped out onto the road and had just started to cross. She had only taken a few steps when a motorist sped through the crossing. Jumping back, she pulled the pram towards her and stood once more on the pavement, her heart pounding. And then the tears came. She slumped against the wall, her chest heaving while loud sobs escaped her mouth. It had almost happened again and the accident that had almost killed her and her unborn baby started to flash before her eyes. She was shaking uncontrollably.

"Kate. Oh my God Kate. What's happened?"

Kate looked up and through her tears made out a familiar face that was bent over her. She gave her a weak smile.

"It's Elizabeth from the hospital. Surely you haven't forgotten me already?"

Elizabeth offered her hand to Kate. She took it and stood upright.

"I'm sorry. I didn't recognise you with your clothes on. I mean without your clothes on."

Elizabeth laughed at her.

"I know what you mean. Lots of people say how different I look when I am out of uniform with my hair all wild and windswept."

Kate wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"What brings you round here? You live on the other side of town don't you?"

Kate was regaining her composure and stopped to check that Flora was OK. She had slept through the whole incident.

"Yes I do. I was driving home from work and decided to swing by this way and check out that antique shop on the corner. And then I saw what happened so I pulled over. I didn't know it was you though."

"I was on my way to the shop and when I was crossing the road, I almost got "

And the sobs came again. She fell into Elizabeth's arms and felt the warmth of her embrace and the reassurance that everything would be OK.

"I know, I know. But you didn't. Everything is going to be OK. "

She stroked her head and Kate calmed down again, sniffing loudly. Elizabeth handed her a tissue.

"It's clean. Come on, I'll take you home."

* * *

As Caroline pulled into the drive, she frowned at the car that was parked behind Kate's, racking her brains as to where she had seen it before. She wondered whether the midwife had called round to see Kate now that she was back home.

"Hi. It's me. I'm home. Have you had a good day?"

She heard laughing coming from the living room and after hanging up her coat, she popped her head around the door. She was taken aback to see Elizabeth sat with Kate on the sofa.

"Oh. This is err, a surprise."

Elizabeth stood up and walked over to Caroline. She opened her arms and pulled Caroline into a hug. Peering over her shoulder, Caroline looked at Kate and widened her eyes to question why Elizabeth was in her house. Kate mouthed something to her but Caroline didn't have time to work out what she had said before Elizabeth was pulling away again.

"You have a beautiful house, you and Kate."

"Thank you. We like it. So err, what do you urm what brings you here?"

"Elizabeth came to my rescue today when I was out shopping. Some idiot jumped a red light while I was crossing the road and I almost got knocked over."

"Oh my God Kate. Are you OK? Were you hurt? What about the baby?"

"No, I'm fine. We're fine. Well, I am now. Elizabeth was passing as I was bawling my eyes out at the side of the road. She offered to drive me home. And I'm sorry but I didn't get chance to get anything for tea."

Caroline perched on the arm of the sofa and pulled Kate close.

"That's the least of our worries. It doesn't matter. I can make us some tea with what we have in the house. The main thing is that you are OK. Is Lawrence home?"

"He is. Well he was but then he went out with Angus. He said he would be back by 9pm but I said to make it 8pm because I was sure he would have homework to do. "

Caroline kissed the top of her head.

"See, you are learning about this mothering lark. I'll make a start with tea."

Just as she was walking towards the door, Kate spoke to Elizabeth.

"Do you want to stay for tea?"

Caroline spun round.

"Won't you need to get home to the boys and Dan?"

Elizabeth sensed that she had outstayed her welcome.

"Yes, I suppose I ought to go. Oh gosh, is that really the time. Thank you for the tea Kate. I'll see myself out."

She stood up and kissed Kate on the cheek before gently touching Caroline on the shoulder and leaving the room.

"Bye Elizabeth. Lovely seeing you again. Bye."

As soon as the front door was closed, Kate looked over at Caroline.

"Well, that was rude."

"What was? Kate, I've had a long and busy day. I just want to sit and relax with my wife. I do not want some woman who we barely know spoiling that."

Kate gasped at her.

"I cannot believe you just said that. Elizabeth was very good to me when I was in hospital. The least I could do was to ask her to stay for a meal."

"That is what she gets paid for Kate. To look after people. Just the same as I get paid to run a school. And anyway, I don't particularly like her. There is something not quite right about her. Now I am going to cook some tea. I will shout you when it is ready."


	13. Chapter 13

Kate was feeding Flora when Caroline came through to tell her that dinner was ready.

"It's nothing special. You know, just some pasta and vegetables in a tomato sauce."

Kate looked up at her and smiled.

"You really do spoil me Caroline. I don't deserve it. And I just want to say that I'm "

"Sssshhhh don't say anything. It's gone, forgotten, no more. Let's just have a nice evening meal together. Come on, give me the baby and I'll put her down."

Caroline bent over and scooped Flora out of her arms. She gave Kate a chaste kiss and then leant forward again and kissed her with more passion. Remembering that she was holding the baby, she stood up and walked away slowly, mindful to the fact that Kate was watching her. She stopped in the doorway and purposefully turned around.

"Don't."

Kate's eyes were pleading with her.

"What?"

The response from Caroline was said with innocence.

"You know exactly what. Do you know what you are doing to me right now?"

Kate bit her bottom lip and stared at Caroline with her chocolate brown eyes.

"I know what I would like to do to you right now but I haven't slaved over a hot stove for a good 30 minutes for nothing you know."

Kate smiled and lay back on the sofa, leaning her head back on the cushions. Hearing Caroline's footsteps on the stairs, she closed her eyes and subconsciously felt her stomach. Gently rubbing her hands up and down she willed the scar to disappear and wondered if it ever would. Sighing deeply, she lifted herself up and walked into the kitchen.

* * *

As she was stirring the sauce, Caroline came behind her and put her arms around her waist, pulling her close. She nuzzled into her neck and kissed her.

"What time did you say Lawrence would be home?"

"8pm. Why?"

Caroline gently turned her around and kissed her full on the lips.

"Oh, no reason."

Draping her hands around Kate's neck, Caroline leaned forward and rubbed her nose against Kate's. Slowly and deliberately, she kissed her, slipping her tongue into Kate's mouth, savouring her, tasting her.

Kate moaned and responded, reaching down to feel Caroline's buttocks through her skirt, pulling her close and grinding herself against her.

Caroline reached behind Kate and turned off the heat under the saucepan and picked up Kate's hand. She led her back through to the living room and, kicking the door shut with her foot, she pulled Kate down onto the sofa.

"I have missed you so much."

She traced the outline of her face with her fingertips and lifted her chin up. Kate smiled at her.

"I've missed you too."

"How much?"

Caroline kissed her and allowed her hands to wander down Kate's body, gently feeling her breasts over her top.

"This much."

She felt Kate stiffen as she started to rub her nipples and she stopped.

"OK?"

She nodded unconvincingly and Caroline was surprised to see Kate's eyes filling with tears.

"What's wrong? Oh Kate my love."

Caroline pulled the sleeve of her blouse over her hand and soaked up the tears. Kate shook her head.

"Nothing. Oh, I don't know. I just feel so, well so, unsexy and ugly."

Caroline sat up and stared at her. She smiled slowly.

"You're kidding me. Kate, you are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out. I love you more today than I did yesterday. And I know that I will love you more tomorrow. And by the way, did I ever tell you that you are very pretty?"

Kate smiled and sniffed, licking the tears off her top lip.

"Once or twice. Do you really mean it though? Now, I mean? After everything that has happened."

Caroline nodded and took her face in her hands.

"Huh huh. Now more than ever. After the accident, when you were in a coma, I sat for hours just looking at you and talking to you. I told you so much. My inner most fears and thoughts. Where I saw us in 10 years time. Even where we could go on holiday next year. I am sure some of it sounded silly but I needed to say it. And I know that you couldn't hear me but that was OK. Some of it was probably nonsense and utter drivel anyway. "

Kate took Caroline's hand and kissed her fingers.

"You don't know much I wish that I could have heard you. Everything will be OK won't it?"

Caroline clasped both of Kate's hands in her own.

"Of course it will be OK. And if it's not, if we struggle for a while, we will get through it. And you know what, if you are not ready for this, not ready for us to you know, well that's OK as well. I just want to be here with you. Today and forever."

This time it was Kate who initiated the kiss and she put her hand on the back of Caroline's head and ran her fingers through her hair. When Caroline's hands wandered, she relaxed and let her caress her breasts. She took her time exploring Kate's body, stroking her arms, kissing her passionately. Kate returned the kisses and arched her back, suddenly wanting Caroline more than ever.

When Caroline's hand slipped inside the top of Kate's trousers, Kate once more stiffened and Caroline slowly stroked her stomach, circling her belly button with her finger, all the while kissing her and stroking her cheek with her left hand. She was desperate to make love to Kate.

Kate put her hand on the top of Caroline's and moved it further down until her fingers were inside the top of her panties. Breathless, Caroline pulled away.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

Caroline shifted her position and lay down on the settee, pulling Kate beside her. She started to unfasten her belt, hurriedly fumbling with the button.

The front door slammed.

"Mum, I'm home."

"Shit."

They sat bolt upright and straightened their clothes, Kate zipping her trousers back up. Caroline coughed lightly as Lawrence bounded through the living room door.

"Hell… hello love. You're mmm you're home early, I didn't expect you until 8-o-oclock."

Lawrence stopped and looked from Kate to his mum and back again, suddenly feeling a little awkward.

"Yeah, I need my text book for my homework. I'll just, err I'll go and"

And without finishing the sentence, he left the room and headed towards the kitchen before Caroline could say anything.

Caroline looked at Kate and burst out laughing. Her laughter was infectious and Kate joined in until they were both bent double, giggling like two children. Lawrence overheard them from the kitchen and rolled his eyes. His mum could be so embarrassing.

* * *

When Caroline woke and looked at the clock, it was 2am. Flora had been asleep for over 6 hours straight and she turned over to face the crib. Kate was wide awake and sat up in bed. She looked at Caroline when she felt her move.

"I'm worried Caroline. She should have woken by now. Shall I wake her?"

Caroline shook her head.

"She will wake when she is hungry. Is she still breathing?"

Kate suddenly panicked and put her head down into the crib.

"Yes. Yes, I can hear her."

Caroline smiled.

"I was kidding! Then leave her. Trust me. If you start to wake her up every 4 hours, she will be 12 years old before she sleeps through the night."

Despite being anxious, Kate smiled.

"Come here."

Caroline lifted her arm, inviting Kate to snuggle into her. She wrapped her arm around Kate, letting it rest just above her breast.

"We're dancing to her tune now Kate. Flora Grace will let us know when she is hungry, when she is tired, when she needs changing. We just have to be there for her."

And right on cue, Flora stirred, wrinkled her little nose and started to cry.

"Do you want me to go?"

Caroline made to sit up.

"No. You go back to sleep. You have work tomorrow. Well today actually. I'll do it."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

Kate kissed her on the nose and got out of bed.

"Come on little lady. Let's get you sorted."

Caroline smiled and watched them leave the room. She couldn't even begin to imagine what life would be like without them. They had become her world, her everything. She turned over and went back to sleep, never stirring until 6am when her alarm clock woke her.

* * *

It had been a few days since Caroline had seen her mum. In fact, Celia hadn't been round to the house since the day Kate came home from the hospital. Caroline was almost starting to miss her so when Celia's face appeared at the kitchen window as she was finishing her breakfast, she grinned and rushed to the back door.

"Mum!"

She opened her arms and Celia walked into them, hugging her tightly.

"Hello love. How's things?"

Caroline closed the door and headed back up to the kitchen.

"Fine. Yes, they're good. How are you? And Alan?"

"Oh you know. Up and down from Halifax every two minutes sorting out the messes that Gillian keeps getting herself into. If it isn't her, is something or another with Raff or Ellie or the baby. Oh, and you'll like this one. Her and Robbie are getting married."

"Who is?"

"Well, I'm not talking about the baby. Gillian you daft apeth."

"No! Seriously?"

Celia nodded and folded her arms.

"I said to Alan, I said, don't you go offering to pay for it all. They're both working – let them foot the bill."

Caroline started to clear away her breakfast pots and she turned to face Celia, one hand on her hip the other holding a dish cloth.

"When's all this happening?"

"God knows. Can you imagine what sort of do it will be? Lots of beer and wine and finger sandwiches and pork pie."

Caroline laughed and bent over.

"Oh, don't! Listen, will you be around later? For dinner I mean? It would be lovely to see you and Alan. And for you to see the baby. You won't believe how much she has grown. Honestly! And Kate is getting stronger every day."

Celia hugged Caroline.

"I am so pleased love. Really, I am. Yes we'll be here for dinner. I'll tell Alan."

"Great. I'm looking forward to it. Now, I don't mean to be rude but I have to dash. I have a staff meeting before the start of the school day. Some idiot brought a bag of sweets into school yesterday and tried to pass them off as drugs. We had 2 whole classes running around high on a bag of smarties."

Celia tutted.

"Whatever next? See you later."

Celia let herself out of the back door as Caroline did 3 things at the same time whilst looking at her watch and chastising herself for already being 5 minutes behind schedule.

* * *

Caroline didn't really know what to expect when she let herself into the house 9 hours later. She hadn't seen Kate that morning because she was still asleep when she left the house. And when she rang at lunch time, Kate sounded distracted.

 _"_ _Kate. Hello. How are you? And the baby?"_

 _"_ _Why didn't you wake us? We didn't get up until after 8am."_

 _"_ _Well, you must have needed it. What did you have to get up for?"_

 _Caroline absentmindedly drew her finger over the window frame as she was looking out at the children taking their lunch break._

 _"_ _Nothing. Well, other than I said that I would meet Elizabeth in town if I had nothing else on. But by the time I had got us both fed and dressed, Elizabeth only had 40 minutes before she had to be at work. So I didn't bother."_

 _Caroline stopped what she was doing and stared at her finger._

 _"_ _Oh. You never said. How long err when did you arrange this?"_

 _"_ _It was the other day when you were rude to her. I texted her and we said we would meet for coffee. Anyway, do I need to? Tell you I mean? Do you want me to let you know everything I am doing during the day?"_

 _Caroline sighed._

 _"_ _No. No. I didn't mean that. Of course I don't. Listen I just thought I would let you know that I have invited Mum and Alan for dinner. I hope that's OK. I thought it would be nice, you know, because we haven't seen them for a few days. I will be home by 6 at the latest and I've invited them round for 7. Kate? Kate? That is OK isn't it?"_

 _"_ _Yes. Yes Caroline. That's fine. See you later."_

 _And she_ was gone.

Caroline hung up her coat and walked down the hallway.

"Kate, are you there?"

"In the kitchen."

Caroline smiled and opened the door. The aroma was delicious.

Kate was standing at the sink with her back to Caroline washing pots.

"Hello my love. Good day?"

Kate turned round and Caroline kissed her.

"What are you doing? You didn't need to do this. I'm only a few minutes late."

Kate shrugged.

"It's no trouble. Flora Grace has been a little angel all day so I had lots of time on my hands. I thought I would help out. And I felt bad for my outburst earlier and for hanging up the phone."

Caroline pulled her into her arms and kissed her again.

"Stop. Stop apologising. Believe me, I know what it's like. Your hormones are all over the place and you don't know whether you're coming or going. You have so many images in your head about what motherhood should be like that you end up driving yourself mad. But you just have to find out for yourself. Everyone's different. Every baby is different."

Kate buried her head into Caroline's shoulder.

"I've been horrible haven't I? Can you ever forgive me?"

"There's nothing to forgive. You can make it up to me later. In the meantime, I'm going to get changed."

Kate swatted Caroline's behind with the tea towel and laughed.

"I'll hold you to that."

As Caroline walked into her bedroom and started to unbutton her blouse, she couldn't help but think about why Kate had arranged to meet Elizabeth but hadn't thought to tell her. It was probably nothing but Kate knew she didn't particularly like her. She was sure that Kate still felt indebted to her for everything she had done while she was in hospital. Either that or Elizabeth was the one wanting the friendship. Either way, it made Caroline feel slightly uncomfortable. Almost jealous.

* * *

"So there he was face down in the field, covered from head to do in sheep sh … in sheep muck and this ewe was just standing there cleaning up her new born lamb as if nothing had ever happened."

Kate covered her mouth with the back of her hand and laughed. It was a hearty laugh and she picked up her napkin and dabbed at the corner of her eyes.

"Oh Alan! There really never is a dull moment at the farm is there. So how is Ellie doing at Greenhough's then? This management programme she joined. Is it working out for her?"

Alan wiped his mouth and placed his napkin on the table at the side of him.

"Let's just say that she is whipping our Raff into shape since she started working there. She certainly doesn't stand any nonsense from him."

Caroline pushed herself away from the table and picked up Celia's dinner plate.

"Thanks love. That was smashing."

"Don't thank me. Kate did most of the cooking. I just, well, I just set the table really."

She smiled over at Kate and placed her hand on her shoulder.

"Really? Goodness, when I had had Caroline, and I nearly died you know. Did I ever tell you that? Well I did. But anyway, when Caroline was a baby, I never had a moment to myself. "

Caroline rolled her eyes.

"Well yes mum but that was at a time when you had terry nappies and you had to soak them in that horrible detergent stuff. And then wash them in that antiquated twin tub you used to pull out and plumb in. And sterilising bottles wasn't the same as it is nowadays."

"Oh, I remember that washing machine. Women have it so easy nowadays don't they with all the new fandangled modern things."

Alan coughed but Kate didn't seem perturbed, In fact, she was almost up for the challenge.

"But women face other challenges now Celia. There are so many other different pressures that society places on a new parent. Whether to breastfeed, how soon to wean, whether it's acceptable to go back to work after 4 months, which mother and toddler group to go to."

"Oh we didn't give a stuff in them days about all that nonsense. You had a baby and you looked after it. Mostly on your own. The men didn't do anything. Well, not that that matters in your relationship because there no men."

Caroline shot her mum a look.

"What? I was only saying?"

Alan interjected.

"You were only saying how much you admire Kate for having the time to cook a wonderful meal and make sure that little Flora is happy and contented. Weren't you?"

Celia glared at Alan and then looked back at Kate.

"I suppose so. It's just not the same nowadays is it. Do you want a hand with the washing up love?"

Caroline picked up another plate off the table,

"No, no. I'll just stack them in the dishwasher and sort them out tomorrow morning. You get off home if you want. It was lovely to see you both. We ought to make this a regular thing. Set a night aside where we all sit down and have dinner. Perhaps Lawrence can join us next time."

"Aye that would be grand wouldn't it love."

Alan touched Celia on the arm and almost herded her towards the back door.

Kate followed them, pulling her cardigan around her as if she was cold and folding her arms.

"Night Celia. Night Alan. Thank you for coming."

Alan kissed her on the cheek.

"Night love. Thank you for dinner." And then quieter he said "Sorry about Celia."

Kate shrugged her shoulders and smiled, letting him know that it didn't matter. Celia had said worst things to her in the past. This was almost nothing in comparison.

Caroline stood by her side and put her arm around her shoulder.

"Night mum."

She kissed her mum as she walked past and lay her hand on the top of Alan's arm.

"Thanks for coming. Bye. Bye bye."

Closing and locking the door, she turned round to Kate.

"That was quite a nice evening wasn't it?"

Kate sniffed.

"Was it? Do you think your mother will ever like me Caroline? Ever accept me into the family?"

Caroline pulled her into her arms and kissed her forehead.

"Oh, she already has! This is her way of telling you that you are doing alright in her books."

Kate laughed.

"Well, I wouldn't like to see what she would be like if she didn't like me. I mean, really didn't like me."

Caroline laughed with her.

"Me neither. Let's hope it never happens. Come on, let's go to bed. I have a promise to keep."


	14. Chapter 14

Caroline pulled into the driveway and switched off her engine. She lay her head on the back of the seat and sighed. It had been a long a difficult week in many respects but it was Friday evening and she had the whole weekend ahead of her to spend with her family. And in just 2 weeks time, it was the start of the summer holidays so she had almost 7 whole weeks to recharge her batteries.

Kate was in the lounge and Caroline flopped beside her on the sofa, pulled the footstool nearer and put her feet up. She blew out, long and hard, and looked over at Kate, placing her hand on her thigh and smiling at her.

"Long day?"

Caroline nodded.

"Long day, long week. I don't know Kate. I am sure that the parents of some of my children are winging it most of the time, and making it up as they go along. They seem to move from one day to the next making mistake after mistake."

Kate looked at her.

"I know how they feel about winging it and making mistakes! How can something so little be so demanding and take up so much time? Look at her, totally oblivious to the amount of work she generates on a daily basis."

They both looked towards Flora who was asleep in a little bouncy chair and smiled, their faces showing the obvious love they felt for her.

"Anyway, how has your day been?"

Kate sat up.

"I had an unexpected visit from Celia today."

"My Mother?"

"Unless you know any other Celia then yes."

Caroline raised her eyebrows at Kate.

"What did she want?"

"Nothing really. We just chatted, you know, like you do. Hey you didn't tell me that John had got himself a permanent job teaching at the University."

"Didn't I? Sorry. Anyway, go on. Wait a minute, I don't think I knew that. How does my mother know things when I don't? When has she seen John?""

Kate started to speak several times and then sat and waited for Caroline to finish. She held her hands up.

"Sorry."

"No, that's fine. That's about it really. She was talking about the impending wedding and how it's doomed to fail. And then saying how her and Alan ought to look for a place somewhere in between Halifax and Harrogate to make it easier for them. It was quite a pleasant half hour."

"They'll never do it. Move I mean. My mother is too set in her ways. She likes the drama of her life. And she loves telling people how busy she is running between her successful daughter's house in Harrogate and a little run down sheep farm in Halifax. Hungry?"

Caroline started to get up from the sofa but was pulled back down by Kate.

"It just depends what you are offering."

"Mrs McKenzie-Dawson! Are you suggesting that we …."

Kate silenced her with a kiss.

"No I'm not suggesting it. I am saying that we ought to …."

There was a high pitched scream from the corner.

"That we ought to feed Flora and then take it from there."

Caroline laughed.

"I'll make a start on tea."

* * *

The sun was streaming through the curtains and Caroline turned over and felt the bed beside her. It was empty. With a struggle she opened her eyes and looked at the clock. It read 8.49am.

"Oh gosh."

Swinging her legs out of bed, she sat on the edge and put her head in her hands before running her fingers through her hair and standing up. She could hear the radio on and the smell of bacon cooking drew her downstairs and into the kitchen. Her heart leapt when she saw Kate dancing around the table, the baby in one hand and a fork in the other.

Kate turned around at the sound of Caroline's laughter.

"Oh, you've spoilt it. Flora and I were going to bring you breakfast in bed."

"Were you? Ah, how sweet. Thank you."

She kissed her and licked her lips.

"You taste of …. Mmmm chocolate. Why do you taste of chocolate?"

Kate obviously moved a jar of chocolate spread along the counter and innocently shrugged.

"I have no idea. Now do you want breakfast in bed or down here?"

Caroline perched on one of the stools.

"I'll have it down here. Do you want me to do anything?"

Kate handed her Flora.

"Here, have the baby while I finish off."

Caroline cradled the baby, cooing over her and playing with her fingers, smiling gently and blowing tiny raspberries.

"So what do you want to do today? Shall we go into town and show the baby off? It looks like it is going to be a nice day. We could have a walk around Valley gardens and perhaps stop for coffee and cake at one of those lovely little tea rooms."

Kate turned around and walked towards Caroline.

"Yes I would like that. I would like that very much. Hey, this will be the first time that we have been out together as a family. A real family. How exciting."

Caroline pulled Kate towards her and wrapped one arm around her waist, craning her neck to look at her. She looked from Flora to Kate and grinned. She couldn't remember a time when she had felt happier.

* * *

By the time they had eaten, showered, dressed and Flora had been changed, fed and changed again it was almost 10.30am. They manoeuvred the pram out of the house and set off down the street, Kate pushing and Caroline walking alongside. They took their time, stopping to look in the shop windows, making plans for the rest of the weekend and just enjoying being together.

They were both ready for a coffee as they reached the gardens and Kate chose a table outside while Caroline went to get the drinks. As she was coming out with them, she was almost knocked off her feet by a little boy riding a scooter.

"Blimey! Watch where you're going."

The little boy turned round and stuck his tongue out at her. Kate laughed but Caroline was far from amused.

"I will be mortified if Flora does something like that when she is his age. What sort of parenting has he had? See, that is exactly what I was talking about yesterday, about those parents that just make it up as they go along."

Kate placed her hand over Caroline's.

"Calm down! It was just a child playing. Come on Caroline, lighten up."

Her shoulders relaxed and she picked up Kate's hand in her own.

"You're right. Yes, sorry. Oh, I do love the view from here."

Turning round, she closed her eyes and felt the warm of the sun on her face. The gardens were one of her favourite places in the area. You could escape from the hustle and bustle and you wouldn't even know that there was a popular tourist town just 10 minutes away.

"Kate! Caroline! I thought it was you."

Caroline's eyes snapped open and she saw a couple walking towards them. There was a small boy holding the hand of one woman and another boy circling them on a scooter. The same boy that had almost knocked her over not 10 minutes earlier. She looked over at Kate and raised her eyebrows.

"Elizabeth! What a lovely surprise."

The sarcasm in her voice was lost to Elizabeth but not to Kate, who sat uncomfortably cradling her drink. Caroline stood up and offered her hand to Elizabeth. She took it and drew Caroline towards her, kissing her on both cheeks. Caroline dug her hands deep into her pockets and stared at the floor shuffling from one foot to another.

"It's so lovely to see you both. And under such better circumstances. Kate, I hope you have gotten over the little drama of the other day. Oh, how rude of me. Introductions! Dan, this is Caroline. Caroline, Dan."

Dan was more formal than her partner and she shook the hand that Caroline offered her.

"Kate, meet Dan. Dan, meet Kate."

Kate looked up at Dan and smiled.

"Nice to meet you Dan. Elizabeth has told me so much about you."

"Likewise."

Elizabeth pulled up a chair and sat down, stretching her legs out in front of her and crossing her ankles. Dan stood awkwardly behind her, still holding the hand of one boy while watching the other racing around.

"So who is this then?"

Kate broke the silence.

"This is Sam. Say hello Sam."

His response was barely audible and Dan looked at Kate.

"He's a bit shy. So unlike his brother, as you can probably tell. That's Ben over there on the scooter."

"We've met Ben haven't we Kate?"

Kate shot a warning glance at Caroline and then turned and smiled, taking Dan in from head to toe with one sweeping glance. She was about the same height as Kate and of similar build but that was where the similarities ended. Dan had bleached blonde hair cropped very short in a pixie cut. It had quite a feminine look to it and the multiple ear piercings complemented it. Dan's outfit was very casual – jeans and trainers and a tight fitting tee-shirt that revealed a sleeve of tattoos on her right arm.

"So do you come here often?"

Before Kate had finished speaking, Caroline had almost spit her coffee into the cup. Elizabeth noticed and she laughed.

"We try to but with the shift patterns that we both work, it is very difficult."

Caroline put her cup down.

"So what it is you do for a living Dan?"

"I'm a neurosurgeon."

Caroline stared.

"Yeah right."

"No she is. That's how we met, at the hospital. In the canteen actually."

Caroline blushed.

"Oh, I am sorry. It's just that you don't err well, you don't look like you would have err that you could be a surgeon."

Dan pulled up a spare chair and sat down. Sam perched on her knee.

"That's OK. It's what most people think. They see me and they see the tattoos and they form a very bigoted opinion of who I am. Hardly anyone guesses what I do for a living."

"Well, there is a certain sort of person that springs to mind when you mention brain surgeon. Middle aged man, glasses, perhaps a little overweight. Very middle class. So what made you choose this route?"

Dan smiled.

"It wasn't my first choice when I finished my medical degree. I had spent 6 years as an under-graduate and done various placements with a doctors practice and at St Mary's for a while, studying emergency medicine. And then I decided I wanted to specialise so I had to make my choice. I was sure that I wanted to continue with emergency medicine but then my father was diagnosed with a brain tumour and to cut a long story short, he died during surgery. I was upset but most of all I was angry. I never blamed the hospital but I did wonder whether maybe he could have been saved. So I decided to go into neurosurgery. Another 6 years of training and 12 years in total after I first entered medical school, I became a bona fide surgeon with my own scalpel and everything. I've been doing it for 15 years and finally settled here some 8 years ago."

Caroline was dumbfounded.

"Wow! So it took you 12 years to get to where you are? That's amazing. I have such admiration for you, for your dedication."

"Thank you. So what do you do Caroline when you're not fending off one of my kids."

Dan laughed and sat back in the chair.

"I'm a head teacher."

Now it was Dan's turn to raise her eyebrows.

"No kidding? If I had had to guess what you did, I would have said you were a teacher. A woman's intuition is hardly every wrong."

"It's all I have ever wanted to do, all I have ever wanted to be. I love my job, the variation, not knowing what is going to happen from one day to the next."

While Caroline and Dan were talking, Kate had taken Flora out of the pram and Elizabeth was making a fuss of her.

"Well those two certainly seem to be getting along."

Kate looked over and saw Caroline with her head in her hands, laughing. Dan was obviously telling her an amusing tale and was very animated, her eyes wide and her voice raised.

"Dan's appearance sometimes puts people off you know. We are often told she is so typical of what people expect a lesbian to look like."

She emphasised the word "lesbian" with her two index fingers.

"But once they get to know her, they are instantly drawn to her. They still see a stereotypical couple when they see us holding hands though. We may live in the 21st century but some people are so narrow minded aren't they? Do you often get that when you are outside of your house? People staring when you are walking down the street?"

Kate mused the question for a short time.

"No not really. But then Caroline and I don't often show affection towards each other in public. Well, not much anyway. Don't get me wrong, she is very loving and tactile when we are at home. But, oh, I don't know. There are certain expectations that someone has of a headmaster and being gay isn't one of them. We can hardly show up at work hand in hand can we? You have to give off the right impression don't you. Does that make sense? "

Elizabeth raised both her hands and let them fall into her lap.

"It makes perfect sense but I just don't understand. God Kate. How do you put up with that? I wouldn't. I know that Caroline was married to a man before she met you but she is with you now. You are her wife. It is absolutely permissible for her to hold hands with you in the street. In fact, why the hell shouldn't you? It's not right to hide your feelings just because you are scared that someone might have a dig at you."

Kate's heckles were up and she straightened her back.

"It's not line that Elizabeth. All this really is no big deal. And anyway, I don't see how it is any of your business what Caroline and I do. When I was in hospital, I welcomed your advice about my care and recovery. You were the medical expert out of the two of us. But please don't go lecturing me and preaching to me about my private life when you know nothing about me. About us. Just because I don't go waving a rainbow flag about when I go out doesn't mean that I am not comfortable with who I am, with who either of us are."

She drained her coffee cup and stood up.

"Kate, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that you can't let people "

She didn't let Elizabeth finish.

"Caroline. I would like to leave now."

Caroline looked disappointed.

"Oh, I was err "

Then she saw the look on Kate's face and knew something was wrong.

"Well, yes, we had better go. The baby will want feeding soon."

She stood up and looked down at Dan.

"Lovely to meet you Dan. You really must come over for dinner sometime. Perhaps we can finish our conversation."

"No worries. Take care Caroline. Bye Kate."

Kate was already starting to walk away and Caroline touched Elizabeth on the shoulder.

"Bye Elizabeth."

Elizabeth held her hand up and waved and Caroline rushed after Kate.

"What's wrong Kate. Has something happened? Did Elizabeth say something?"

Kate carried on walking.

"Let's just say you were right about her."

Caroline caught up with her and placed her hand on top of hers as she pushed the pram.

"Come on. We can talk about this when we get home."

"There really is nothing to talk about. Elizabeth is very direct and I am not sure I like that. I don't want her telling me how I should act with my wife. I don't think I will be pursuing this friendship anymore, you will be pleased to know."

Caroline opened her eyes.

"Oh I see. Well, that's a shame because I think Dan is great."

Kate stopped walking.

"Only because you found out she is a brain surgeon. When you first saw her, you hated her. I could tell. You had already formed a picture of her and her being successful and earning lots of money was not part of that picture."

Caroline gave a small cough.

"That's not strictly true. I wouldn't say I hated her. I was just a little wary of her. She was a little much to take in all at one go. I mean did you see those tattoos?"

Kate looked across at her.

"Yes I did actually. In fact, I am thinking of getting something very similar."

Caroline stopped walking.

"You're not? Please tell me you are …"

"No I am not. But if I were Caroline, would that make me a different person?"

Caroline's pace quickened and she was soon by her side again.

"I take your point. OK. Yes. I was a little quick to judge. But Dan is very interesting, warm, funny."

"Well when she takes you up on your offer for dinner, don't expect me to be there. Because I won't Caroline."

Caroline caught Kate's arm, forcing her to stop.

"Are you jealous Mrs McKenzie-Dawson? Are you jealous of Dan?"

She bit her bottom lip and looked directly at Caroline, her dark eyes starting to mist over.

"Maybe a little bit."

Caroline took her face in her hands and kissed her, long and hard.

"Well there is no need to be. No need at all. I love you Kate. I think I have only ever loved you. There is nothing to worry about. Believe me."

"Honestly?"

"Honestly. Now come on, let's go home. This little one will really want feeding soon. And I am getting hungry."

She swatted Kate's behind and put her hand on the pushchair, forcing the pace a little. Kate picked up Caroline's free hand and squeezed it tight.


	15. Chapter 15

The last day of term was always a bittersweet one for Caroline. She had already said goodbye to her year 11s and supervised their GCSE exams. And the year 13s had long since finished their A-level exams. Both year groups would be anxiously awaiting their results and ready to start the next leg of their life journeys. But the last day was always different. 5 year groups were moving onward and upwards and would be returning at the start of the new term. And Caroline was in charge of their welfare and education.

As she took off her robes for the last time this school year, Caroline looked around her office with mixed feelings. So much had happened in there over the last 18 months: she had told Kate that she could no longer be with her and had then outed herself to Michael Dobson after he betrayed Kate's friendship and trust. After a long night searching for her mother, she had shared a very passionate encounter with Kate after which she told her that John knew about them. She had listened to John tell her that he had been dropped by his publisher which was the start of his downward spiral and if

that wasn't enough, she had also heard the devastating news that Kate was pregnant months after the 2 had stopped seeing each other.

As she was clearing her desk, Beverley popped her head around her office door.

"Caroline, there's someone to see you."

She looked up, distracted.

"Tell them to come back in September when the new terms start."

Beverley smiled.

"Oh, I don't think it can wait till then."

Stepping back, she pushed the door open and stood to one side. Caroline caught sight of the front of a very familiar pram and she beamed.

"Kate! What are you doing here?"

Beverley touched her arm.

"I'll leave you two alone."

"Thanks Beverley. I know what an emotional basket case you can be on your last day so I decided, Flora and I decided, to come by and see you."

"Aww that's lovely. Such a nice surprise. Thank you Kate. Thank you."

She walked over and took her in her arms, kissing her gently. Stroking the side of her face, Kate shifted to her other foot and moaned lightly.

"I was just thinking about that day when we, you know, when I kissed you here in my office. That was mad wasn't it?"

Kate smiled at the memory.

"You damn near seduced me! I had to fend you off."

Caroline laughed loudly.

"Oh you so did not! May I remind you that you were the one who invited me back to your place after school that evening. "

Kate blushed and Caroline cupped her chin.

"Not that I was complaining. Right give me 5 minutes to pack away and I will be with you. You couldn't do me a favour could you and fetch me something from the car?"

* * *

They were all stood in the outer office, Beverley cradling a huge bouquet of flowers.

"Just to say thank you for everything this year. For your hard work and organisation skills and discretion."

Caroline hugged Beverley who rubbed her back.

"You are more than welcome Dr Caroline. I love working here. Sulgrave is so much a part of my life. I'm going to miss it during the summer."

"Yes me too."

Kate raised her eyebrows and looked at them.

"Err, excuse me. Schools out ladies. Time to go. You will be too busy to miss school this summer Caroline. I can guarantee that."

Kate took her hand and started to lead her towards the door.

"Someone's keen."

Beverley laughed.

"I just want this one all to myself. No timetables to reschedule. No suspensions to argue over with parents. No Board minutes to proof read and sign off. And no financial accounts and figures to mull over and reallocate. Just you, me and Flora Grace."

Beverley peered once more into the pram.

"I must say Kate, she is absolutely beautiful. She looks so much like you but I can't see the resemb "

She stopped and looked at Caroline who held her hands up.

"Resemblance. Yep I know. It's OK, really it is. I know that biologically Flora will never me mine but I also know that I can give her so much more than genes. I can teach her to be kind and true to herself. I can teach her to be a good person and to love with all her heart."

"Aww Caroline! That's beautiful it really is. And so true. And I am sorry. Sorry to have said that. Right, I will get off before I start blubbering. Have a fantastic summer and I will see you in 6 weeks. 6 whole weeks."

The 3 ladies embraced and hugged again and Beverley bumbled out of her office juggling far too many things and not making a very good job of it.

"So what do you want to do now Caroline? I can cook some supper for us or we can eat out."

"Can we just go home? Is that alright?"

Caroline suddenly looked very jaded and she perched on the edge of her huge office table.

"Of course it is! Is something wrong?"

Kate walked over to Caroline and stood in front of her, resting her hands lightly on her shoulders. She leaned in and their foreheads touched. Caroline moved her head up and kissed Kate lightly.

"Yep, err no, no. I'm just, you know, tired. I always get like this on the last day of the school year. I think I will sleep for a week."

Kate picked up her hands and pulled her up off the table, bringing her close to her and wrapping her arms round her.

"Come on, let's go home. I think a nice long bath is in order.

* * *

Caroline lay her head back on Kate's bare breasts and allowed Kate to wash her gently. She hugged Kate's knees which were on either side of her and ran her fingers up and down her calves. As Kate's hands moved down her stomach, the sponge leaving a circle of soap bubbles, Caroline closed her eyes and her shoulders relaxed.

"Let's go away somewhere."

"Mmmmmmmm?"

Caroline's voice was sleepy.

"I said why don't we go away somewhere. Lawrence is going away with John next week. Why don't we have a trip away, just the 3 of us."

Caroline sat up a little and twisted her body around.

"Are you serious?"

"Deadly. How about a week in Cornwall?"

Caroline laughed.

"Oh good Lord! I haven't been to Cornwall in years. John and I once took the boys down there and William was stung by a jellyfish twice in one day. Not the same jellyfish. Well at least I don't think it was. And then John, well, John went on"

Caroline stopped talking mid sentence.

"Err oh I am sorry Kate. I didn't mean to go on about it. It's just that, John was, he is. Anyway, yes I think Cornwall would be a wonderful place to take Flora on her first holiday."

Kate picked up the sponge and squeezed it over Caroline's shoulders, watching the water run in tiny rivulets over her breasts and down her stomach. She repeated this and felt Caroline relax again.

"It's fine. You and John were married for almost 20 years. I understand. I'll have a look tomorrow and see what we can find. I hope we haven't left it too late to book something."

Caroline sighed and closed her eyes. She sculled the water around Kate's legs and moved further down into the bath. Bending her knees up, she rested her head on Kate's mound and wet her hair, pushing it back off her face with both hands.

Kate pulled herself back up on the edge of the bath and Caroline sank further under the water until just her face was visible beneath the bubbles. She was just about to make her move when the baby monitor crackled and Flora's cries came over the wave lengths.

"Leave her. She'll be fine."

Caroline sat up, the water cascading down the bath and in danger of spilling out all over the floor. She started to turn over onto her knees to face Kate and then thought better of it.

"I am getting too old for this. In my mind I am an athlete with a lithe body that can contort into all kinds of positions. In reality, I am a mum of 3 in my late forties."

Kate burst out laughing and offered Caroline a helping hand. Between them, they managed to both stand up in the bath, their naked, wet bodies crushed together as they kissed hungrily and explored each other.

The cries over the baby monitor were getting louder and Kate ended the kiss and grabbed a towel. She threw one at Caroline.

"I'll do you a deal. I'll feed the baby if you pour me a glass of wine, not too much though."

Rubbing her hair, she stepped out of the bath and grabbed her robe. Caroline swatted her behind with her own towel.

"Deal. But don't be too long. The wine might be breathing but I barely am."

* * *

"And he is only 16 so do not under any circumstances let him drink anything alcoholic."

Lawrence groaned.

"And make sure he doesn't spend all his spare time on his phone. You know how much I hate those things especially in a social situation. What is wrong with talking to people for heavens sake."

"Mum!"

"Yes Caroline. Anything else? I think I know how to look after my own son after all this time."

Caroline folded her arms and put all her weight on one leg. Her hip jutted out and John leered at her. For a moment, he forgot that she was no longer his wife.

"Really? I am not so sure about that. Remember the time when you left him in your flat on his own while you went off looking for Judith? He ended up spending the night at Kates. How irresponsible was that?"

John dug his hands deep into his pocket and looked at the floor.

"Oh gosh, I had forgotten about that. Well, it won't happen this time."

"Make sure it doesn't. Lawrence, have you packed enough clean underwear to last you the week?"

Lawrence raised his eyebrows and tutted. He bent down and picked up his bag.

"Come on popsicle. Let's go. Bye mum. Bye Kate."

As Caroline moved to hug him, he gave her an air kiss and dashed down the hallway, almost knocking over the telephone table. Caroline rushed after him and stood on the doorstep, watching him get in the car.

"You will be careful won't you? Look after your father Lawrence."

With a small wave, he got in the car and shut the door, not looking back as the car pulled away. Caroline stood waving until he was out of sight.

* * *

"Do we really need to take all this lot Kate? The woman at the rental cottage said there was adequate provision for a baby. Why would we need to take a bath? And you have packed enough clothes to last a month. Have you actually left any of Flora's clothes in her room?"

Caroline was stood in the hallway with her hands on her hips surveying the mountain of bags that Kate had left at the side of the front door. She was mentally working out how they would get it all into the back of the car. Along with their own suitcases, she would probably struggle.

"Do you really think it is excessive?"

Caroline laughed.

"They do have shops where we are going you know. If Flora runs out of clothes, bearing in mind that the apartment does have a washing machine, but if she does run out of clothes, we can go on an expedition to the shops and buy her some more."

Kate walked up the side of Caroline and put her arm around her waist.

"I just want to make sure that I have everything. This is our first holiday together as a family, our first holiday together as a couple. I just want it to be perfect."

Caroline kissed the top of her head.

"It will be Kate. We don't need all this lot to make it perfect. We just need each other."

* * *

Caroline got out of the car and stretched upwards.

"God I had forgotten how long this drive is. Are you OK in the back?"

"Yes, we're fine here thanks. Aren't we Flora? Although by the smell of things, Flora could do with changing. Where are we?"

"Just outside Bristol. I thought a comfort break was in order. Can I do anything?"

They had already been driving for 4 hours. Best guesses would put them in St Ives in another 3 hours, traffic permitting.

Caroline had opened the back door before Kate had the chance to respond.

"Can you just grab the changing back from the back and I will unfasten this little stink bomb. Come on you. Let's get you sorted."

She picked up Flora from the car seat and she gurgled and kicked her legs. Holding her close to her, she caught up with Caroline and took hold of her hand. Caroline squeezed it and they walked into the service station.

They made for a lovely looking couple. Caroline with her hair pulled back into a French pleat, her milky white skin blending in with her blonde fringe. And Kate with her hair hanging loose in tiny plaits, her chocolate brown skin in stark contrast to that of her wife.

"I'll grab us a coffee and a Danish while you see to Flora. Is that OK?"

Kate turned and smiled.

"Why do I always get the rotten jobs?"

Caroline was just about to say something when Kate laughed.

"Of course it is. Make mine an extra large one with plenty of caffeine."

She watched Caroline walk away. Even in jeans and loafers she still had a sexy swagger and Kate had to stop herself from whistling after her. She let her mind drift to the first time they had kissed, the first time she had acknowledged that she had feelings for Caroline.

 _"_ _Well, that was a productive meeting. Thank you Kate for staying late and helping me."_

 _Kate stood up to leave._

 _"_ _You are very welcome. I am glad that I could help progress things."_

 _As they bent to gather their papers, Kate sensed Caroline very close to her and as they lifted their heads, she could feel her breath on her cheek. Slowly, Kate turned her face to look at Caroline and in a moment of madness, she leaned forward and kissed her._

 _The kiss wasn't reciprocated but Kate continued to move her lips. Suddenly, she felt Caroline's tongue slip into her mouth and then a fervour and intensity which she had never experienced._

 _Caroline reached her hands out to cover Kate's and then she pulled her into her arms and clung to her as she continued to kiss her. Kate's head was starting to spin and she felt her knees tremble. She pulled away breathless and stared at Caroline, unsure what to make of what had just happened._

 _"_ _Well, yes, right, thank you Miss McKenzie. Good evening."_

 _Caroline dismissed her and Kate left her office. She sat in her car, breathing deeply and wondering whether she had just signed her own dismissal letter. She watched Caroline leave the building and marvelled at the form that strutted past, totally oblivious to her little Fiat parked 3 cars away. She watched Caroline climb into her car and run her fingers over her lips, a small smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes._

"Kate. Kate."

Kate blinked and shook her head.

"I thought you were going to change Flora. Are you alright? Here, give her to me. You look like, well I'm not sure what you look like. Are you OK?"

Kate smiled slowly and leaned forward. She whispered something in Caroline's ear and she blushed. Coughing lightly, she took the changing bag from Kate.

"Oh, I see. Well I am not sure that we can err, well you know, that we can do urm urm. Someone is going to bring coffee and hot water for Flora's bottle. I'll just go and change her."

This time, the swagger was exaggerated and intentional and Caroline nonchalantly looked over her shoulder and winked at Kate.


	16. Chapter 16

The sunlight streamed through the curtains and the smell of the sea air drifted in through the open window. Caroline turned over, reaching out her arm. It found Kate and she smiled softly and draped it over her sleeping form. She loved lazy mornings in bed and planned to do very little this holiday except spend it with her family relaxing and enjoying the beautiful part of the country where they were spending the next 7 days.

The apartment in Logans Court was in a quiet area of Carbis Bay just along the coast from St Ives. Kate had been very lucky to get it: the people letting it said that they had had a cancellation at very short notice. It had spectacular views across the bay and on a clear day, they were told that they would be able to see the lighthouse at St Ives one way and the Godrevy Lighthouse in the opposite direction. It was in a perfect tranquil location and they were only a 10 minute walk away from the beach.

Kate stirred and shifted position and Caroline nuzzled into her neck, pulling her closer. She breathed in the musky scent of Kate's perfume and kissed her neck.

"Good morning Mrs McKenzie-Dawson."

She could hear the smile in Kate's response.

"Good morning Mrs McKenzie-Dawson."

She chuckled.

"Good lord. That still sounds strange you know, hearing our names said together."

Kate turned over and kissed Caroline softly.

"I love my new name. Thank you for sharing yours with me."

"No, thank you for sharing yours with me. A new name and a new beginning."

Caroline sat up and strained her neck so she could see the cot at the other side of the room.

"Look at her, still fast asleep and snoring. The journey yesterday and the fresh air has really knocked her out. Let's make the most of the peace and quiet while we can."

Caroline cupped Kate's right breast in her hand and rubbed the nipple through the material of her pyjamas. Pressing her hand over Caroline's she moved slightly so that they were spooning very tightly. Caroline started to caress Kate's thighs, paying particular attention to the front.

"Mmmm Caroline."

Kate moaned and turned in towards Caroline so she was laying on her back. Caroline supported her own weight on her elbow and with her other hand she started to trace the contours of Kate's face.

"Have I ever told you how happy I am? I mean truly happy?"

Kate smiled and took her hand in hers and gently kissed her fingers.

"Me too. That day, when you called and I came round and sat in the garden. Do you remember? I think you had thrown a bucket of water over John or something."

Caroline laughed.

"God. I had forgotten that. Oh it was funny. You should have seen his face."

"I can imagine. Well I hadn't forgotten that day. I never will. I'd had feelings for you for a long time, you know that. But that day I started to see the real you. The vulnerable side. And I began to fall in love with you. I even optimistically started to think that we had a future together, you and me."

Caroline's eyes started to mist over.

"Really?"

"Yes. And I know that the journey hasn't been an easy one and that we have both had to put up with a lot from each other. But we are here now and the real journey is just beginning. You, me and the baby."

Kate sat up a little bit and pulled Caroline's face towards her. She kissed her with a passion that she had never known. And Caroline kissed her back, her tongue slowly exploring Kate's mouth as her senses heightened.

Moving her weight onto her arms, Caroline's mouth moved slowly down Kate's body, gently nipping at her breasts. Kate lifted her top up and over her head allowing Caroline access to her bare skin. She sucked lightly on her left nipple then worked her way along to the right one, flicking her tongue around the nub, gently fondling the fullness of them.

When she reached her belly, Caroline felt Kate stiffen and she stopped briefly, taking time to kiss and caress the scar that Kate was still so conscious about. Reaching up for Kate's hand, she squeezed it to reassure her and felt Kate relax into the bed one more.

Caroline slipped her hands inside Kate's shorts and started to pull them down, all the while kissing her mound and her thighs. Kate lifted her bottom off the bed, allowing Caroline to remove them. They were quickly on the floor.

Within seconds, Kate had parted her legs and Caroline was between them, her tongue expertly pleasuring her, her fingers slipping gently in and out. It was a very slow and sensual encounter demonstrating the love that Caroline had for Kate and when she finally climaxed, Caroline's kisses and attention travelled back up her body until their faces were level.

"Wow, what a way to start the day."

Caroline laughed and kissed her on the nose.

"Wow indeed."

* * *

Caroline served Kate breakfast on the balcony and they sat with the sun on their faces looking out to sea.

"What do you want to do today? We could take the train to St Ives. It isn't far away.

Kate put down her cup.

"What? You on public transport?

Caroline laughed.

"I'll have you know that I have been on that train many times. When John and I …. Oh sorry Kate. Anyway, we could do that or we could to go the Barbara Hepworth sculpture garden. I have never been there."

"Ooo, that sounds interesting. And Caroline, you don't need to keep apologising for talking about your past with John. I make no apologies for bringing Richard into the conversation. During my time with him, I realised who I really was and what I really wanted."

Caroline reached across the table and took her hand.

"I know but there is a lot I feel I need to apologise for where John is concerned believe you me. I feel like most of my married life was spent apologising to people for his behaviour. Sending letters and flowers to colleagues and friends the morning after the night before. Anyway, that really is all in the past now. The sculpture garden it is then. I'll go and pack Flora's bag which you finish your coffee. Will you be OK with walking?"

Since the accident, Kate had been having physiotherapy on her leg. It wasn't badly damaged but she had lost quite a lot of muscle tone when she was in hospital. Since she had returned home, she regularly took Flora out for small walks to the shops and back to increase her physical activity. She was even contemplating joining the local gym.

"No, I'll be fine. A walk will do me the world of good. I don't want to get out of the habit just because we are on holiday."

Caroline kissed her lightly on the lips as she leaned over and picked up some plates from the table.

"Just as long as you are sure. We can always take the car."

Kate laughed.

"What you mean is YOU would rather take the car. Let's compromise. You drive to the sculpture park and we will walk around the gardens a while."

Caroline bent down and kissed her again.

"You know me so well!"

* * *

By the end of their tour around the sculpture garden, Kate was starting to tire and Caroline tactfully gave over the pushchair to her so that she would have something to support her a little bit. She covered her left hand with her own and stroked the back of it with her thumb as they walked towards the exit.

"This is a remarkable place. Barbara Hepworth has to be one of the twentieth century's most important sculptors."

Caroline was flicking through the guide book and looking at the illustrations. The look on Kate's face told her she had had enough and she made a decision to leave.

"Right, I think we have seen them all. How about a drink and some late lunch?"

She looked at her watch.

"Gosh, it will be a very late lunch. I can't believe Flora hasn't woken up yet. She will be ready for her bottle by the time we get to the café."

Leaning into the pram, Caroline swept her hair off her tiny face with her finger and smiled down at the sleeping baby.

After a brief look at the menu boards, Kate chose a table in the corner of the café and unstrapped Flora from the pram, taking off her cardigan and smoothing down her dress. Caroline went to get their food.

"Caroline? Caroline? Oh my God. I thought it was you."

As she looked around, Caroline was staring into the face of Dan, the partner of Elizabeth who had nursed Kate back to health.

Caroline was speechless and stared open mouthed.

"What what what err good lord. Dan!"

She opened her arms and embraced Dan, kissing her on both cheeks. She scanned the room for Elizabeth and the boys.

"What are you doing here? Are you here alone?"

Dan smiled coyly.

"I would love to say no but the truth of the matter is yes, I am here on my own."

"Here here or just here at the museum?"

Dan smiled.

"No just here at the museum. Elizabeth and the boys at back in St Ives. I couldn't face another day on the beach. Isn't that awful? I mean I love the boys and I love playing with them. I just don't love the sand. It gets everywhere and in everything. So I came here. It was on my list of things to do and they would have absolutely hated it. How about you?"

"Do I like the beach? Not much."

Caroline pulled a face and Dan laughed.

"I didn't mean that. I meant are you here on your own."

As Caroline shook her head, Dan looked around and spotted Kate in the corner.

"Do you mind if I join you? I am craving some adult conversation. There are only so many times that you can pretend the minions are funny."

"I know! What is that all about? Little yellow men dressed in dungarees."

* * *

As Caroline placed the tray on the table, she whispered to Kate through pursed lips.

"You will never guess who is here. Here as in this café. Don't look now! I said don't loooo oh, you did! Yes Dan. You know Dan. Brain surgeon. Lives with Elizabeth. 2 small boys."

Kate opened her mouth and then snapped it shut again. She craned her neck to look around the restaurant.

"Yes I know which Dan you meant. God Caroline, she's coming over. Pretend you haven't seen her."

Caroline shrugged.

"It's a bit late for that now. She spotted me and spoke to me. Smile and be nice to her."

"Kate! How lovely to see you."

Kate half rose from the chair and extended her hand.

"What a lovely surprise Dan. Of all the places in all the world."

Dan pulled up a chair and peered at Flora.

"Aww, how pretty is she? Does she sleep at all the right times?"

Kate smiled.

"Usually but she has slept for the last 3 hours so she will probably be up half the night with colic or something."

Caroline rolled her eyes and groaned.

"Tell me about it! So Dan, what brings you here? To St Ives I mean. It's a long way to travel from Harrogate."

Dan shifted in her chair and crossed her legs.

"I could say the same to you. I don't know. Elizabeth wanted to come. Said she had heard some nice things about it and that it was the place to holiday this year. She came home just last week and said she had booked something. It was a nightmare to get the time off work at such short notice. How about your two?"

Kate jumped in.

"That's funny. I only mentioned to Elizabeth a couple of weeks ago that I was thinking of booking a week here at the start of the summer holidays. I wonder if I put the idea into her head. It seems like a strange coincidence that we are both here at the same time."

Caroline opened her eyes at Kate to indicate that she had said too much and cut into the conversation. Kate pretended not to notice and she picked up the bottle that was warming in the jug of hot water. Flora greedily sucked at it.

"Err well, I used to come here a lot with the boys when they were little and Kate always wanted to see the place. So she surprised me didn't you Kate?"

"Something like that. Excuse me. I think Flora needs changing."

Kate slammed the bottle back into the water, causing it to splash everywhere. She stood up and grabbed the bag off the back of the pram and headed towards to the toilets leaving Caroline feeling a little embarrassed. She could hear Flora wailing long after she had closed the toilet door.

"Sorry. She must be tired. Kate I mean. The baby is just hungry. We have walked a fair bit today and she's just not used to it after the operation and everything."

Dan held her hands up.

"No, it's OK. Don't apologise. I imagine what she must feel like to have someone interrupt their holiday. She might even feel a little threatened."

The hairs on the back of Caroline's neck rose.

"Threatened? Why would Kate feel threatened?"

Dan leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees and her hands clasped together. She was surprisingly close to Caroline's face.

"You tell me Caroline."

Caroline shot back in her chair and crossed her legs. She started playing with the spoon on the table.

"Come on, don't go all shy on me."

Caroline looked up, trying to avoid Dan's stare.

"Well well I I erm could could mmmm could you be suggesting, oh my god you really are not suggesting that you and me, me and you ..."

Dan stood to leave.

"I am not the one who brought it up Caroline, you are. Say goodbye to Kate for me."

Caroline watched Dan leave, almost too shocked to shout after her or to respond.

* * *

When Kate returned with Flora, she was relieved to see that Caroline was sat on her own. She placed her hand on her shoulder as she passed.

"Was it something I said because I certainly hope so."

She sat down and handed Flora to Caroline who took the bottle of milk from the jug and continued to feed her.

"I'm sorry Caroline but I just don't like her. I know that you got on OK with her when we met but there is just something I can't quite fathom."

Caroline was stroking the back of Flora's hand, playing with her fingers. Her gaze never met Kate's.

"Well I've changed my mind. I don't like Dan either. I don't like her at all."

Kate sensed a chill in her voice.

"Caroline, has something happened?"

Caroline lifted her head.

"What makes you think that? No, no, nothing's happened. Just something she said that's all. It's not important."

"It clearly is. She has upset you hasn't she? Caroline?"

She shifted uncomfortably in the chair, lifting Flora up over her shoulder. She gently rocked her backwards and forwards, rubbing her back.

"Wind. If I don't get it all up, she won't rest. You know what she is like."

"Caroline, stop avoiding the issue. What exactly did Dan say?"

She wasn't going to let it lie and Caroline stood up and walked over to the window.

"I think she has, that she has a a thing for me. That she likes me."

There was silence and Caroline waited a full 2 minutes before she slowly turned around. Kate was staring at her.

"She didn't say as much but she said that you might feel threatened by her being here and when I said, when I asked her if she was suggesting what I thought she was suggesting, she made out as though it was all my doing. As if it was me that was coming on to her. But I'm not Kate. I find her interesting but I am not mildly attracted to her."

Kate stood up and took her coat off the back of the chair.

"You do believe me don't you?"

Kate let out a short laugh and kissed Caroline full on the lips.

"Of course I do. You wouldn't have told me all that if you were interested in her. Now, I don't know about you, but I have had enough here. Come on, let's head back. A little afternoon siesta won't do any of us any harm."


	17. Chapter 17

They were 3 days into the holiday before Kate finally persuaded Caroline to go to the beach.

"Come on, you'll love it."

Caroline laughed.

"I so will not. I hate the beach. I'm with Dan on that one and."

Caroline stopped mid sentence and turned her back on Kate. Since their encounter at the sculpture gardens, the subject of Dan and Elizabeth hadn't been broached. Caroline felt she had said all there was to say on the matter. She respected Elizabeth as a nurse and she found Dan interesting as a surgeon but beyond that, there was nothing more.

"Kate, can I just say something? This is important. You know how I feel about Dan and Elizabeth. I made it clear from the start that I didn't even want to be friends with them. Our relationship was and should remain on a purely professional level. She is, no was, your nurse and Dan is her partner. Although God knows she doesn't act like one."

Caroline ran her fingers through her hair and started to chew on her thumb.

"Anyway, the fact is, the fact is this. They are here in St Ives but that is not my doing. I agree, it is one hell of a coincidence. It is even rather creepy. But it was not because of me. Now I want to enjoy the rest of my holiday without looking over my shoulder and worrying that we might bump into them. But if we do, you know, see them, we will be civil but we will not engage in conversation. Is that clear?"

Kate put down the sandwich she was wrapping and pulled her cardigan across her body, folding her arms in a very defensive manner.

"This has really got to you Caroline hasn't it?"

"Yes, yes of course it has. Hasn't it you?"

She walked over to Kate and pulled her into her arms, tucking some loose hair behind her ears.

"No it hasn't. And do you know why? They can try whichever way they want to be our friends, to get closer to us in whatever way they will. But they will never ever split us up because you and me are in this for keeps."

Caroline smiled and as she blinked, a tear rolled down her cheek.

"Thank you."

The words were merely more than a whisper.

* * *

Kate thought that the beach at Corbis Bay was one of beauty and she was in awe from the moment she got out of the car. The sub-tropical plants and turquoise waters would fool anyone into thinking they were abroad. Kate looked around, a big grin spreading on her face.

"I can't believe we are only one mile from of St Ives. How can you not like somewhere as wonderful as this Caroline."

Caroline, who was struggling to drag the pram across the sand stopped and looked at her. She was breathing heavily.

"The scenery is amazing, I'll give you that. I would just prefer to be admiring it from over there in one of the cafes rather than here, ankle deep in sand."

Kate burst out laughing.

"Well this looks a good a spot as any so let's stop and set up camp here."

She dropped the cool box and started to unfold the blanket which had been tucked under her arm. As soon as it hit the sand, Caroline flopped onto it and lay on her back, her jean cladded legs bent and her hands behind her head. She squinted up at Kate.

"You do know that Flora isn't going to appreciate this experience or even remember it. You do realise that don't you?"

Kate put her hands on her hips.

"Are you going to be grumpy all day or are you going to make an effort for our daughter?

Caroline sat up and placed her hands behind her, supporting her weight. She crossed her angles.

"Do I have much choice?"

Kate unfastened Flora from her pram and lay her at the side of Caroline.

"No. You have no choice at all."

Caroline looked down at Flora and rubbed her tummy.

"Come on then, let's build a sandcastle for mummy."

Kate smiled and crouched in front of Caroline, kissing her and pushing her backwards. The pair fell back onto the blanked and started sniggering.

"See, you can smile if you want to."

* * *

They lasted for 2 hours before they decided that they had "done the beach". At just 10 weeks old, Flora really was too young and Caroline and Kate had spent most of their time watching other families enjoying themselves. As Caroline stood up to pack their things away, she felt relaxed for the first time since they had arrived in St Ives.

"I hate to admit it but I have enjoyed myself this morning. I can't say I am a convert but it wasn't as bad as I remember. Mind you, once the baby starts walking, I am not sure that I will be able to say that. Lawrence used to wander off everywhere and then bring back all the waifs and strays from the beach and expect me to buy them all an ice cream."

"And John?"

"He was in the pub most of the time getting pissed. Thank God for my mother."

Kate raised her eyebrows.

"How is she, your mother?"

Caroline stopped folding the blanket and looked at Kate.

"She rang yesterday while you were getting supper ready. Yes, she's fine. Alan and her are back down in Harrogate after spending the weekend up at the farm. They really will need to decide where they are going to live soon. I can't see Gillian giving up the farm to live in Robbie's house. They are a bit like mum and Alan. They haven't set down their roots. Anyway he is going to have to move in there permanently I suppose. And then there's Raff and Ellie and the baby, although she isn't a baby now is she? Anyway, they're all shoved into one room when they really shouldn't be. And the farm house. You've seen it haven't you? Oh, wait I don't think you have. Oh Kate, it's so old fashioned and in need of a good clean and a lick of paint. It really isn't up to my mother's standards."

Kate burst out laughing.

"So she's good then?"

Caroline shrugged.

"You know my mother. She is happy when she has a drama going on in her life or something to moan about. At the minute she has both so I guess you can say that my mother is good."

Caroline walked over to Kate and rubbed her arm.

"And how are you my love? How are you feeling?"

Kate smiled at her and covered her hand with her own.

"I feel good, thank you. I haven't done much today but I still feel tired. A nice tired though."

She slid her hand down her arm and slipped it into hers.

"Come on. Let's go and get some lunch and then we can head back. I have a new Chemistry paper that I want to read about the existence of element zero. You can take a nap if you want one."

Kate looked over the top of her sunglasses at her.

"You old romantic you."

* * *

They drove a short distance to the Lookout Restaurant at The Pedn-Olva Hotel. Caroline had spotted it when they were at the sculpture park and thought it would be worth a visit. They were delighted to be shown a table with stunning views over Porthminster beach.

They both chose a fresh seafood dish and picked at the bread basket while they waited. Kate looked into the pram at Flora.

"She has been so well behaved again hasn't she? This fresh air really must be doing her the world of good. You wouldn't have thought that she was delivered quickly and early and a little underweight would you?"

Caroline smiled lovingly at her wife.

"And I wouldn't have thought that only 9 weeks ago, you were just waking up after your horrific ordeal. I am so proud of you Kate. So proud of both of you. I really cannot imagine what my life would be like without you."

She swallowed hard and sniffed.

"Good lord, look at me."

Kate kicked off her shoe and ran her foot up and down Caroline's shin.

"It has been a rough couple of months hasn't it? But we're here now, you and me and little Flora Grace and I really couldn't be happier."

Caroline leaned back in her chair and looked down at the beach. It was still busy and there were loads of people making the most of the sun. One particular family who were playing cricked caught her eye. She leaned forward and then quickly sank back in her chair.

"Shit. Shit."

Kate put down her glass.

"What's wrong?"

Caroline furtively got out of her chair and moved to the side of Kate so her back was to the beach.

"It's them. Elizabeth and Dan and the boys. Oh God, I hope they haven't seen us."

Kate started to giggle.

"Stop. Shush. They might hear us."

Her giggling got louder.

"Caroline, they are down on the beach. They have no idea we are up here. And even if they did know, we are probably the last people they would expect to see. I bet Elizabeth doesn't even know we are here."

Caroline whispered.

"But Dan does. That's enough isn't it? She scares me a little you know. The more I think about what she said to me the other day, the more I shudder."

Kate stared long and hard at Caroline.

"What?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking. Why did Dan say what she said to you?"

Caroline flicked her hair off her shoulders.

"Because I am, I am magnificent."

She pouted and laughed but Kate's face was severe.

"No, please. I am being serious. She knows that we are married. She knows that we have a baby. Why would she do such a thing?"

Caroline shrugged and held up her hands. She shook her head.

"I stopped trying to fathom people out a long time ago. You get screwed up if you try to get into their heads. Believe me, I tried with John and look what happened."

"John is an extreme case though isn't he? Isn't he? Dan is different. Dan is a mother, a partner, a brain surgeon for heavens sake. Why would she do this? Why would she try to mess with other peoples' happiness?"

Caroline shifted in the chair and crossed her leg. She reached out to Kate and rubbed her hand up and down her forearm.

"I have no idea. And I don't care. She can do what she likes Kate. I am not interested. I am no more interested in her than I am in getting back with my ex."

She leaned forward to kiss Kate but was interrupted.

"Whiting?"

Caroline gave a little cough and blushed.

"That's mine. Oh thank you. It Iooks delicious."

* * *

Caroline had dropped to sleep, the paper she was reading resting on her chest. She was dreaming about being chased by large atoms when suddenly she was awoken by a loud scream. Realising it wasn't hers, she sat upright in the chair, taking a moment to remember where she was.

"Kate? Kate?"

She dashed into the bedroom but couldn't see anyone.

"I'm here."

Kate was collapsed on the floor at the side of the bed.

"Oh my God. What happened?"

She knelt by her side and took her hand in her own.

"I don't know. I went to get up from the bed and my leg just gave way."

Caroline ran her hand over her forehead and crooned to her.

"And how do you feel now? Are you hot, or dizzy?"

Kate tried to sit up and Caroline placed her forearm under her armpit to provide that extra bit of support. She pulled her up into a sitting position.

"I don't know. My leg is sort of burning. And it aches."

Caroline pulled up Kate's leggings and looked at her left leg.

"How long has it been like this? Swollen I mean? I didn't notice the other night when we were, when you and me were, well I didn't notice."

Kate rubbed her leg.

"A couple of days I guess. I thought it was all that walking we did at the sculpture park. It did tire me out."

Caroline reached up to the bedside table and grabbed Kate's phone.

"Something's not right. I am going to ring the NHS Helpline and get some advice. It will be OK Kate. Everything's going to be fine."

Kate shifted positions and rested her back against the bed. Caroline took her hand and rubbed her thumb up and down the back of it.

"Yes she is breathing. Yes she is responsive. Do you want to talk to her? Hold the line a moment please."

She passed the phone to Kate.

"They want to talk to you. I am just going to get some things together and sort out Flora."

As Caroline busied herself with Flora, she kept looking over at Kate and wondering how long her leg had really been as bad as that. They had been warned that this might happen given the amount of time Kate was in hospital and unable to move but she thought that the danger would have passed. Kate had been up and about but she had been very careful not to overdo things.

"Yes. Yes. I had an accident and was hospitalised.? Oh it happened about 10 weeks ago. Yes. For 5 weeks."

Caroline was pacing, her hands on her hips, her eyes wide.

"No, I am on holiday. St Ives. The Royal Cornwall? No. Wait a minute."

Kate put the phone on her leg and looked over at Caroline. She had her own phone in her hand and was pacing.

"I'm just Googling it. Wait. Christ! That's over 20 miles away! Is there nothing nearer?"

Kate spoke to the operator.

"Yes, yes, we know where it is."

Caroline was waving her arms around, trying to get Kates' attention.

"Give me the phone. Pass it here."

She was whispering through gritted teeth and trying to grab the phone from Kate.

"That's insane, madness. 20 miles. You could be dead by then. Surely there's something nearer."

Kate rolled her eyes and then stuck her finger in her other ear.

"Yes we will set off now. Thank you. I will."

Caroline stood at the side of Kate.

"What did she say? What does she want us to do?"

Kate struggled to her feet while Caroline stood beside her getting angrier.

"They said I shouldn't be alarmed and that it was probably nothing to worry about but they want me to go and get it checked out just in case. They think it might be DVT."

Caroline threw her hands up in the air and shouted.

"Are you serious?"

The baby wailed from her cot in the corner and Caroline a deep breath.

"I am sorry. Getting upset and screaming isn't going to solve anything is it. Right. Do you think you can walk?"

Kate took a few tentative steps forward.

"Yes I'll manage."

"OK. Let's go."

* * *

Caroline knew she was taking the corners too quickly but she just wanted to get Kate to the hospital. She put her left hand on her knee and glanced over at her briefly. Squeezing her leg, she took in deep breath.

"Everything will be fine Kate. It will probably just be cramp or something."

Kate looked over her shoulder at Flora who was dropping to sleep in the back of the jeep.

"Yep, yep. Nothing to worry about."

Her bottom lip quivered and she chewed on the inside of it.

"Everything will be alright won't it Caroline? I can't bear to go through all that again, especially now that I have, that we have Flora."

Caroline squeezed tight again but said nothing. She turned her attention back to the satnav.

"Nearly there."

Pulling up with a screech of her tyres, Caroline jumped out of the car and looked around for a wheelchair. Spotting one in the entrance, she walked briskly to collect it for Kate. Coming the other way was a young man who also seemed intent at collecting the wheel chair. Their eyes locked and she gave him the stare she mostly reserved for Lawrence and her pupils. With her mouth set straight and her head held high, she lunged forward and grabbed the handle of the chair a split second before the young man.

"I think you'll find that this is mine. Thank you."

And with a swish of her hair, she turned a full 180 and strutted back to the car.

Helping Kate out, she gently lowered her into the chair. Deftly she unfastened Flora and placed the car seat on Kate's lap.

"OK?"

Kate nodded and Caroline set off at speed through the automatic doors and down the corridor, all the while looking for the Accident and Emergency department. Being back in a hospital filled her with fear and dread and she was breathing rapidly by the time she reached the reception desk.

"Kate McKenzie-Dawson. We rang the NHS Helpline and they said to bring her straight here. Suspected DVT."

Caroline moved from one foot to the other and stared impatiently at the receptionist.

"I just need to take some details from you. Name, date of birth, that sort of thing. Why don't you let the triage nurse take errr …"

She looked at her computer screen.

"Kate. Her name is Kate."

~Yes, let the triage nurse take Kate and you can give me her details."

Caroline picked up the baby carrier and set it on the floor. Leaning forward, she kissed Kate tenderly and stroked her cheek.

"Don't worry my love. I will be 5 minutes max."

The receptionist quickly turned her gaze back to the screen.

"Right. Date of birth please."

* * *

The doctor was already with Kate by the time Caroline had checked her in and found her again.

"So we are going to do a D-dimer test on your leg. This will show us if any clots have been broken down and are floating about loose in your blood stream."

"What does that entail?"

Caroline had just entered the cubicle and was smiling reassuringly at Kate. She offered her hand to the doctor.

"Sorry I am Caroline, Kate's wife."

The young doctor stopped shaking her hand for a brief second and then smiled at her.

"I was just telling your wife that we are going to take some blood from her and check her range before we do anything else."

Caroline set Flora down on the bed.

"Range? Range of what?"

"When a blood clot breaks up, a substance is released onto the blood. I want to check how much of that substance Kate has in her body."

"And then?"

"If I am not satisfied with the results, I will do an ultrasound scan and use a Doppler to find out how fast the blood is flowing through the blood vessels in your leg. It will help me to see if there are any blockages."

Caroline stood at the side of Kate and put her hands on her shoulder, squeezing gently.

"How long will this take doctor?"

"I want to treat this as a matter of urgency Mrs McKenzie-Dawson. If your wife does have DVT then I want to treat it as soon as possible with an anticoagulant. This .."

Caroline interrupted.

"I am quite aware of what it does thank you Mr err Doctor "

"Sharpe. Doctor Andrew Sharpe. Yes you may well be but I need to explain this in simple terms."

Kate coughed.

"I am here you know. I can hear you. And Caroline, please let the doctor do his job."

Caroline leaned forward slightly.

"I am sorry Kate. I am just worried."

She folded her arms across her chest.

"Go on. So you give her an anticoagulant to reduce the ability of the blood to clot and to stop existing clots getting bigger."

Andrew smiled.

"Your wife knows her stuff doesn't she?"

Kate laughed.

"She thinks she does."

Looking up at Kate, Caroline smiled and picked up her hand.

"It will be fine, I promise."


	18. Chapter 18

Caroline was sitting in the waiting room feeding Flora when the nurse who had been looking after Kate popped her head around the door.

"Kate's back now if you want to come in and see her."

She jumped up, expertly juggling the baby with her changing bag. Placing Flora in the car seat, Caroline followed the nurse, oblivious to the screams and protests at her meal being interrupted.

"Is she err has everything gone OK?"

The nurse held the door open for her and let her into the cubicle area.

"The doctor will tell you more. Don't worry."

But Caroline was worried. When she rounded the corner and saw Kate, she was wearing a hospital gown and had a cannula in her foot. She stopped briefly, her eyes wide, then realised that she wasn't helping Kate by looking worried.

"Hello".

She smiled and sat on the chair at the side of Kate. She picked up Flora again and carried on feeding her, reaching out to Kate with the hand cradling the baby.

The doctor, who had been unseen by Caroline, put down his notes and walked forward.

"So the results of the scan were inconclusive but we are pretty sure that Kate has a DVT. We need to do a venogram to confirm that. It is a straight forward procedure. We inject a coloured dye into this cannula and give it time to travel up through Kate's veins. Then we will x-ray her leg and the dye will highlight any gaps where the clot is stopping the flow of blood."

All the while, Kate and Caroline were looking at the doctor intently. Flora was making little suckling noises and Caroline flicked her eyes to her bottle from time to time to make sure that she was still getting milk.

"How long will this, err will this take long?"

Caroline looked up at the doctor with her bright blue eyes.

"About an hour from start to finish."

"And then what?"

"If the tests conclude that Kate does have a DVT, we will get her started on an anticoagulant straight away. We will give her heparin and then prescribe another drug to take longer term until we can be sure we have minimised any risks."

Caroline looked at Kate and then back at the doctor.

"Will she need to take warfarin?"

The doctor stood with his hands behind his back trying to weigh up the woman throwing all the questions at him.

"We will probably prescribe apixaban. It is just as effective but has less serious side effects than warfarin. Kate will need to take the tablets twice a day for approximately 3 months. And she will need to wear compression stockings for at least 4 weeks. Sorry. I know they aren't very fetching."

For the first time since she had been brought into the hospital, Kate laughed.

"You can say that again."

"Right, let me get a nurse to inject the dye into you and we can get started with this procedure."

* * *

Caroline was pacing the corridor, her hand supporting the elbow of her right arm which was holding the phone close to her ear.

"No mum, everything is fine. Yes, yes, Kate is fine. No I have absolutely no idea. Yes, I will. Give my love to Alan. I've got to go. Bye. Bye bye."

As she put her phone into her pocket, she spotted a familiar figure striding towards her. She knew she had turned too late but she would have done anything to avoid being seen. Bending down she picked up Flora and started to walk the other way.

"Caroline! What are you doing here?"

Caroline slowly turned around.

"Oh, Dan. I err I erm didn't see you there. What a small world."

She took small tentative steps towards Dan.

"Listen Caroline, I need to explain. I need to talk to you."

Caroline stopped.

"There isn't anything to say Dan. And you have nothing that I want to hear."

Dan stood in her way as she went to return back to the waiting room. Flora was in her carry chair on the crook of her arm and Caroline thrust that in front of her to act as a barrier.

"Caroline, let me explain. Please."

Caroline shifted from one foot to the other and looked over Dan's shoulder, desperate for a distraction.

"I'm not going to let you leave until you hear me out. Please Caroline. Hear what I have to say."

Caroline put Flora down on a row of chairs at the side of her. She folded her arms and shifted her weight onto one side.

"Why Dan? Why should I give you even 1 minute to explain? First Elizabeth tries to take advantage of Kate and seduce her. And then you! You are under some strange illusion that I find you irresistible and would want to, well you know, that I would want to betray Kate and do whatever it is that people do when they cheat on their wife."

Caroline was starting to feel more awkward by the minute and she looked up at Dan and made to walk away once more. Dan reached out and touched her arm and quickly retracted as she felt Caroline flinch under her hand.

"I've got a new job down here."

Caroline turned her body so she was looking straight at Dan.

"We need a fresh start, Elizabeth and the boys and me. That's why we are here, in Cornwall. There are so many things that we need to get away from up there in Harrogate. We do love each other. We just need a chance."

"Oh I see."

Caroline looked at Dan, her head slightly on one side. She didn't know what to say.

"What about Elizabeth? Will she leave her job?"

"She will sign up with an agency once we are settled. There is always work for nurses."

"She is a damn good nurse Dan."

Dan smiled.

"Yeah, I know. She's a damn good woman. It's just that, oh I don't know. We are always under so much pressure with our jobs and looking after the boys and stuff. You lose sight of each other don't you? When you're not making time for your own relationship that is."

Caroline dug her hands into her pockets and looked down at her feet, her shoulders slightly hunched. She stayed that way for what felt like ages and then looked directly at Dan.

"I can't say I would know. Kate and I are …. Well we are …. Let's just say that we are not like that."

She turned to pick up Flora.

"I need to go and see Kate. They are, erm, she is having a procedure done and I want to be there when she gets back."

Extending her hand to Dan, she indicated that the conversation was over.

"Give Elizabeth my regards and all the very best to you too. Cornwall is a beautiful part of the country. I am sure you will be very happy."

Dan paused and then took hold of Caroline's hand, gently squeezing it before she shook it.

"I will. You take care Caroline. I do wish we could be friends and "

"Goodbye Dan."

Caroline had heard enough and was eager to get back to Kate. Without looking back, she walked down the corridor and back into the cubicle area.

Dan stood watching, her mind trying to focus on her new job and her family. Moving from Harrogate was absolutely the right thing to do.

* * *

Caroline was pondering the conversation with Dan when they wheeled Kate back into the cubicle. She jumped up onto her feet and rushed over to her.

"How are you?"

Kate smiled up at her.

"Fine. I didn't feel a thing. Well, I did when they put the dye in but other than that it was fine. How have my 2 favourite girls been?"

Caroline smiled at her and looked over at the doctor.

"Fine. Yes, we have been fine."

She addressed the doctor.

"How are things?"

The doctor put down the file and walked over to the bedside.

"Kate does have a clot in her leg but nothing that has caused us any great concern. We have administered a drug that will break it down and then she will need to be on another tablet for a while and visit the hospital for a review. But she is safe to go home. Well, back to your holiday apartment. You can enjoy the last few days of your holiday without any worries."

Caroline held out her hand to the doctor.

"Thank you."

"No, thank you Caroline. If it wasn't for your quick thinking, this might have gone unnoticed and been even more serious."

Caroline blushed.

"Oh, I don't know doctor. The fact that Kate collapsed on the floor told me it was something that needed attention."

They all laughed and the doctor backed away out of the cubicle.

"I will be sending a letter to your doctor outlining what has happened. He will be expecting you to get in touch so don't forget. Take care ladies."

"Thank you doctor."

Kate reached out for Caroline's hand and let out a big sigh. She smiled up at her and mouthed

"I love you."

Caroline leaned forward and kissed her.

"I know."

* * *

Caroline was quiet on the way back and Kate took it as relief that she had got the all clear and had been discharged with nothing more than a follow up appointment and a packet of pills. But when this continued into the evening, Kate was starting to worry.

She put Flora in her cot and sat at the side of Caroline, cosying up to her and leaning her head on her shoulder.

"OK?"

"What?"

Caroline took off her glasses looking somewhat distracted.

"I asked if you were OK. Caroline, something isn't right. You haven't been right since we left the hospital. What's wrong? Is something bothering you?"

Caroline brushed her hair from out of her eyes and folded her glasses into her lap. She gave a small cough and turned around slightly so she was facing Kate.

"I saw Dan earlier."

Her voice was a mere whisper.

"Where? You never said."

Kate sat forward and frowned.

"At the hospital. She had been for a job interview and had just accepted a new position."

"What, down here in St Ives? What about Elizabeth and the children? She's not leaving them is she?"

Caroline shook her head.

"Apparently not. She said something about them needing to make time for each other and that there were too many distractions in Harrogate. I do think she loves her you know. But I think she is someone who will never settle down with one person. The grass is always greener on the other side."

Kate took Caroline's hands in her own and gently squeezed them.

"Maybe it's for the best. For them. For us. I mean, I was never attracted to Elizabeth but she did come on rather hard. Dan was the same. Maybe they need someone else to tell them that they are loved, that they are special. I don't need anyone else to tell me that because I have you."

Caroline looked up and saw that Kate was crying. She reached out and took her face in her hands and wiped the tear away with her thumbs.

"Oh Kate. I love you. I love you so very much."

She took her hand and pulled her up off the settee.

"Come on, it's been a long and difficult day. Let's get some sleep."

* * *

Caroline opened her eyes and squinted at the sun streaming through a crack in the curtain. She buried her face into Kate's neck and whispered something in her ear. Kate moaned and shifted her position, placing a lingering kiss on Caroline's lips. Her kisses continued to her throat and she deftly unfastened the buttons on her pyjama top. Paying no attention to her sighs, Kate moved her mouth to Caroline's breasts, cupping one in her hand and bringing the nipple to her mouth, swirling her tongue around it and feeling it go hard.

Caroline ran her hands over the top of Kate's head, clasping her fingers together and pulling Kate closer. She parted her legs and Kate moved her body in between them. Pulling the bed clothes off, she gave herself access to Caroline's body as she lay in the middle of the bed.

Reaching her hands down, Caroline found Kate's pert nipples and she rolled them between her fingers, weighing her breasts with both hands and caressing them over her vest. Kate stopped for a second while she relished in the touch.

Feeling dominant, Kate's mouth slowly moved down Caroline's stomach and she gently nipped the skin around the top of her pyjama trousers. Carefully, she started to pull them down, revealing Caroline's creamy thighs. Caroline groaned and lifted her body, allowing Kate to remove the trousers. She quickly tossed them onto the floor.

Inhaling her scent, Kate's tongue started to run up and down Caroline's inner thigh, moving to her mound, darting in and out. Caroline closed her legs, clamping them softly around Kate's head, her hips thrusting slowly.

Kate buried her head deeper, her fingers slipping quickly in and out, first one and then two. Caroline bit her lip, her panting getting quicker until at last, Kate felt her quiver around her fingers.

When she finally stopped, Kate moved back up the bed and lay at the side of Caroline, propping herself up on her arm and watching the colour the colour gradually fade from her chest. She ran her fingers up and down her cleavage.

"I see someone is feeling better."

Caroline turned to face Kate and her smile was returned.

"I didn't hear you complaining."

Leaning forward, she gave Kate a long and slow kiss.

"Never my love. Never. Now, you lay there and I will make you some breakfast."

"I have no intention of moving until you do."

She flicked Caroline's thigh as she got up off the bed. Turning round, she blew her a kiss and walked out of the room, aware that Kate was watching her as she grabbed her robe from the floor and put it on.

* * *

Caroline threw the last of the suitcases in the jeep and then climbed the steps back to the front door of the apartment.

"Is that everything?"

She spoke as she walked down the hallway and into the kitchen. Kate turned around.

"Yes. I have checked the bedroom and the bathroom twice. We definitely have everything."

"Good. Let's get going then."

It was just after 11am and they had made a last minute decision to stop off in Bristol overnight. Caroline wasn't looking forward to a 7 hour drive and she was very aware that they would need to make frequent stops to allow Kate to stretch her legs and get some exercise.

They loaded Flora into the back of the car and Kate climbed into the front. Pulling slowly down the drive and stopped and they both turned around to get one last look at the view from the street.

"I will always remember this holiday Caroline. Our first holiday together. Our first holiday as a family."

Kate reached out her hand and placed it on Caroline's thigh.

"Me too. I was sad when we stopped coming here with the boys. But this is like the start of a new chapter for me. For us. Does that sound silly?"

She wrinkled her nose and looked over at Kate.

"Not at all. I love it when you get all sentimental with me. It reminds you that 92% of the children at school are wrong and that your nickname isn't justly deserved after all."

"What nickname?"

Her eyes were wide and Kate couldn't tell if she was on the verge of getting upset or just being dramatic. She laughed at her.

"Mmmm well, I have a few to choose from. When you are in your robes, the children call you Dr Death because they say you look like some ghouly figure almost floating down the halls ready to get your next victim. And when you are doing your staff meetings, the team call you Frosty Knickers because you are cold and hard faced."

Caroline opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again. Her hands flew to the steering wheel and she gripped it before turning slowly to face Kate. Her expression was one of shock.

"Do they? Do they really? I had no idea."

"Are you being serious? You had no idea that you had those nicknames? Has Lawrence or William never let them slip in conversations?"

Caroline shook her head.

"Never."

And then she laughed. Her body doubled over and her laugh got louder until she had difficulty breathing.

"That is actually quite funny. Dr Death and Frosty Knickers. It sounds like some Marvel character with a dual personality."

Her voice changed tone.

"By day, she stalks the halls of Sulgrave and answers to the name of Mrs Frosty Knickers. By night, she transforms into Dr Death and haunts the streets of Harrogate looking for her latest victim."

Kate started to laugh and she took Caroline's hand and kissed the back of it.

"I am glad you see the funny side of it Caroline."

"Oh I do. But God help the next person I hear calling me either of those names."

She put the car into gear and pulled slowly out of the street and down onto the main road. Smiling, she wound the window down and inhaled the sea air, looking out over the water and out into the distance. Yes, she would remember this holiday for a long time to come.


End file.
